Why me... God help me...

[kleptobismol]

Lately more and more things have been coming back. is it possible i'm imagining all this stuff? how could i not remember anything up until now? i was pretty sure i repressed memories, but i never imagined it was anything like this...

if these things did happen it would explain alot about why i was so messed up.

certain words, smells, noises, faces will trigger memories. like little clips i dont ever really see... but i break down i know something bad happened but why cant i remember it... am i crazy? i cant tell my parents. i cant tell anyone i know. i have to resort to telling this to whoever happens to come across this thread.

is my mind playing tricks on me? please tell me its probably just my overactive imagination... im so scared how could this have happened? i dont even know where to put this. i dont know if it was sexual assault or assault or what. May God help me I feel so lost...

i know this probably doesnt make any sense... i cant make sense of it how could yall? all i know is something happened.

repeatedly.

Lord please make it stop.

 

[thepianist]

My dear, what do you see? Do you really see it? God can, and will, help you. Sounds like He is the only one who really can. I will pray for you - that the Lord will show you what you need to know and the way to deal with it.

If you would like to talk to someone, feel free to pm me anytime.

 

[RJHarmony84]

Lately more and more things have been coming back. is it possible i'm imagining all this stuff? how could i not remember anything up until now? i was pretty sure i repressed memories, but i never imagined it was anything like this...

if these things did happen it would explain alot about why i was so messed up.

certain words, smells, noises, faces will trigger memories. like little clips i dont ever really see... but i break down i know something bad happened but why cant i remember it... am i crazy? i cant tell my parents. i cant tell anyone i know. i have to resort to telling this to whoever happens to come across this thread.

is my mind playing tricks on me? please tell me its probably just my overactive imagination... im so scared how could this have happened? i dont even know where to put this. i dont know if it was sexual assault or assault or what. May God help me I feel so lost...

i know this probably doesnt make any sense... i cant make sense of it how could yall? all i know is something happened.

repeatedly.

Lord please make it stop.

Do you really think you're making it up? Or is it that you know it's true, and you wish to god that you could forget again? It's far too easy to repress memories...but that's the easy way out. They always come back to haunt you eventually. Know that you're not alone--there are many many women who are like you, who may have better advice than I, and God will always be by your side NO MATTER WHAT. He knows what happened to you and He can heal you. You may have to deal with memories like this for the rest of your life, but that doesn't have to be as horrible as it sounds. The memories may not go away, but you can find peace! I swear! I've found a bit of peace myself, and altho my case sounds very different from yours, God can heal anyone. Will pray for you...

 

[kleptobismol]

it's there... but how could i just forget about something and then have it come back to me? it's happened before but nothing like this. I'm so scared...

 

[RJHarmony84]

Repressed memories are another form of denial...Denial is something I know very well. I know this can be very crazy-feeling, all of a sudden realizing there's something where you thought there wasn't. I guess my only real advice, for now, is to sort through your feelings--take some time for yourself every day to pray about this. Try to figure out which feelings are real, see if any of them really are just overblown worries--and try to remember all that you can--It may hurt like nothing else, but it's better to know, believe me. Once you are sure of exactly what happened, you can deal with it much easier, and if you have to confront anyone, it's good to have your story straight. In the meantime, take care of yourself! You are a child of God, and you mean a lot to him. Not to mention all the people who care about you too!

 

[kleptobismol]

i was doing just fine... we're packing up because of teh hurricane and wham... it comes out of nowhere. but how could something happen to me and i never knew it happend... it still doesnt make sense to me and i've had to deal with these flashbacks for sometime now... but this is much worse. i feel so lost

 

[Johnnz]

Old memories can suddenly pop up out of nowhere. Each one contains a memory of something that ocurred in your life. When a memory arises identify what happened, how youfelt/reacted, and then ask Jesus to forgive and wash away any wrong response (eg anger, fear, etc) and to replace it with His love.

Feel free to PM me if there is any you wish to discuss or need help with

John
NZ