Why can't everyone in the world just be nice to each other?

Solum Aeternum · Jun 25, 2022

This is a legitimate question, why is it so hard for people to just be nice? Why do people have to be mean occasionally? I'm sorry if I don't live in the "real world" or you label me an idealist. But I never understood why people choose to be mean? And that is in all walks of life, in any spectrum, discussing any top, people just resort to low hanging insults when you don't agree. Yes even on Christian forums, when discussing politics I'd see vile things said about people like it's a toxic twitter thread, heck even discussing the Bible I've some insults and name calling and people just angry. I may have been that way in the past but it's really getting on my nerves every time I scroll through comment sections on any place. Even watching conversations in real life, it feels unnecessary to me. Why do some want to bully people, at school work, even at home. Wouldn't the world be a better place if we were all just friends? I don't accept the notions that "it's life deal with it", I choose to believe we can all be better.

BravoM · Jun 25, 2022

The age old "problem".
Even when faced with an E.L.E like a meteor or the COVID attack, humanity isn't going to "come together" like some Hollywood fantasy.
Humanity, generally, and at large has rejected God so much and the after effects can easily be seen.
There is only one real solution and we can't do anything to affect.
If anything, be the good and light in this world regardless of how much it hates you, family and friend included.

atpollard · Jun 25, 2022

[Romans 5:12 NASB95] 12 Therefore, just as through one man sin entered into the world, and death through sin, and so death spread to all men, because all sinned--

… in a nut shell.

timothyu · Jun 25, 2022

The discovery of self by way of self interest (the original sin) created selfishness. Selfishness begat strife.

ByTheSpirit · Jun 25, 2022

The big issue is pride. If you want to see something truly upsetting, people within the Church don’t even get along. How is the world going to do so if people who “have” the Holy Spirit can’t do it?

BravoM · Jun 25, 2022

ByTheSpirit said:
The big issue is pride. If you want to see something truly upsetting, people within the Church don’t even get along. How is the world going to do so if people who “have” the Holy Spirit can’t do it?

I agree.
I left my last one for reasons and one was the gossip that had started over a recent year. I blame the newer people who came for our food bank for awhile and nothing of the sort was a thing until more of these showed up.
I don't have an answer but almost every problem has a solution.
A constant reminder that gossips is bad would help. Men don't gossip as much as women do and that was where the problem started. That is another story for another time.

Rachel20 · Jun 25, 2022

Bullies are everywhere. And I've found if you try to be humble, respectful, etc... that just makes some of them 10 times worse. But I always try and always will.

And if the righteous scarcely be saved, where shall the ungodly and the sinner appear? 1 Pe 4:18

timothyu · Jun 25, 2022

Pride is selfishness

Rachel20 · Jun 25, 2022

BravoM said:
Men don't gossip as much as women do

Not true. I work in a male-dominated field and am surrounded by men. Used to go out drinking with them all the time (that's history), and I know they're just as bad.

timothyu · Jun 25, 2022

Rachel20 said:
and I know they're just as bad.

Oooooo ... tell me more

BravoM · Jun 25, 2022

It is true.
You're one person and however many you work for don't describe a majority or even half of men.
Your group might be but no minority defines a majority.
There are stereotypes about gossiping and truth is women are the majority.

timothyu · Jun 25, 2022

Nice you caught the humour in that Rachel20. Some might have taken offense. Hence the topic of the thread.

jacks · Jun 25, 2022

Solum Aeternum said:
I choose to believe we can all be better.

I believe this too. I try to remind myself, that the only person I can really control (and not completely) is myself. So even when people are being bad to me, I try not to respond in kind. I also try to reach out to people and just be friendly. It has been my experience, that most people respond positively to this. It's amazing how far a smile can go.

Rachel20 · Jun 25, 2022

BravoM said:
You're one person and however many you work for don't describe a majority or even half of men.
Your group might be but no minority defines a majority.

ditto for you and your church group

BravoM said:
There are stereotypes about gossiping and truth is women are the majority.

don't believe every stereotype

Cockcrow · Jun 25, 2022

Thank Eve for that, if you want to understand more about why the Earth is the way it is today read the book of Genesis, 1st book of the Bible.

Gregory Thompson · Jun 25, 2022

Solum Aeternum said:
why is it so hard for people to just be nice?

This has always been a problem, the first born son of humanity was killed by his younger brother. The first commandment was to love God and your neighbor as yourself, commandments are only given when there is transgression .. so it's always been a problem.

Those who can be nice to one another, do that, but the majority of humans lack the capacity except when for selfish reasons.

bèlla · Jun 25, 2022

If women have a monopoly on gossip then men get the academy award for complaining. And if that’s you here’s the secret.

Just ignore them. Stop getting worked up about the things people do and say and sitting around discussing it. Out of everything you could focus on that’s what comes to mind?

If it bothers you that bad pray about it and leave it alone. Be the difference you want to see and stop expecting others to do the same.

timothyu · Jun 25, 2022

jacks said:
It has been my experience, that most people respond positively to this. It's amazing how far a smile can go.

It's also amazing how quickly a look of confusion or mistrust comes over a great many peoples' faces when you smile and wave.

Jonaitis · Jun 25, 2022

Solum Aeternum said:
This is a legitimate question, why is it so hard for people to just be nice? Why do people have to be mean occasionally? I'm sorry if I don't live in the "real world" or you label me an idealist. But I never understood why people choose to be mean? And that is in all walks of life, in any spectrum, discussing any top, people just resort to low hanging insults when you don't agree. Yes even on Christian forums, when discussing politics I'd see vile things said about people like it's a toxic twitter thread, heck even discussing the Bible I've some insults and name calling and people just angry. I may have been that way in the past but it's really getting on my nerves every time I scroll through comment sections on any place. Even watching conversations in real life, it feels unnecessary to me. Why do some want to bully people, at school work, even at home. Wouldn't the world be a better place if we were all just friends? I don't accept the notions that "it's life deal with it", I choose to believe we can all be better.

I agree with you, and I wish it were different. I always remember that most people's reactions aren't always and necessarily directed at myself, even if it seems logically that way, but rather they display a form projecting from the hurt they have inside from their past related in their minds to the present moment. Everything that happens now, happens because of previous actions. This one woman on Facebook said something similar, and I agree with it:

I learned to understand that the situations I go through are not personal to me. They are just the outcomes of choices. Some of those outcomes affect me negatively, and some positively. I saw my experiences as math problems, like 2+2=4 or 3+4=7. I’ll give an example: an ex who abused me, (even though memories of that still feel painful), they themselves had drank a lot, and were abused themselves. So when the abuse fell upon me, I can now see it as me just experiencing a product of a probable outcome. Some who is abused, and uses drinking to cope, puts themselves in a position to rage. Someone already angry, but now drinking and angry, will only stay angry. And I just happened to be there to experience the outcome of that equation.

This was detrimental to me, because any time I have experienced something negative, I have always seen it as a personal insult. Like, People only want to hurt me, because I'm not worth it to them, to be given their respect. But how others treat me, has never been about me. I was just exposed to their mathematical life expression, because we are all connected. That perspective is helping me deal with my suicidal ideation. When I feel hurt, and helpless, I can remind myself that the pain of their actions, speaks nothing to my value. To be able to remind myself I am valuable, and that nothing changes it, makes it easier to tap into resiliency to live.

partinobodycular · Jun 26, 2022

Solum Aeternum said:
This is a legitimate question, why is it so hard for people to just be nice? Why do people have to be mean occasionally? I'm sorry if I don't live in the "real world" or you label me an idealist. But I never understood why people choose to be mean? And that is in all walks of life, in any spectrum, discussing any top, people just resort to low hanging insults when you don't agree. Yes even on Christian forums, when discussing politics I'd see vile things said about people like it's a toxic twitter thread, heck even discussing the Bible I've some insults and name calling and people just angry. I may have been that way in the past but it's really getting on my nerves every time I scroll through comment sections on any place. Even watching conversations in real life, it feels unnecessary to me. Why do some want to bully people, at school work, even at home. Wouldn't the world be a better place if we were all just friends? I don't accept the notions that "it's life deal with it", I choose to believe we can all be better.

So people are mean...so what? Poor sensitive you doesn't like it. You'd prefer it if the world was all sunshine and lollipops. Well sorry but it's not, if you can't handle that, well that's your problem, but the world has no reason to care about what you do or don't like. People are right, it's life, learn to deal with it. We ain't here to make you happy.

Why can't everyone in the world just be nice to each other?

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Change is inevitable, feel free to spare some.

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