Who else do I need to tell?

[singingwife]

The other day I was on Facebook, and claimed as a "friend" someone I worked for about a decade ago. I had kept in touch with him and his wife for a few years after, and they had been at our wedding. Once he read my page, and saw that I'm now a widow, well, more shock, more having to explain about the death. It was good to get sympathy and to know they now are praying for me specifically, but now I wonder; how many people still need to know? Those who have been widowed for longer; like years, are you still explaining this when you run into people you haven't seen since your spouses were still alive? Now I'm starting to wonder if I should take a new vow of celibacy or something; I sure don't want for people who knew us as Singingwife and ____ to then have to mentally shift to Singingwife and someone-else. AAAHHHH!!!!
Okay, thanks for reading.

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

I have been a widow for 4 years this month. I ran into a previous co-worker at a festival and when he saw me, I was with my kids, and he says "Michelle (last name) where is your husband?" So I had to tell him, he died. Then he felt very awkward (which wasn't my intent) but I had to tell him the truth. So I think you will probably have that as you run across people that you haven't seen in awhile. For me, when my husband died, I was the one that made the phone calls. I don't know why I did, but I just wanted to make sure that everyone that I thought should know did. It was harder at first, but now that he's been gone for a few years, I haven't run into anyone that doesn't know in awhile, but....if I did....yeah, I would have to explain what happened. I think it's more awkward for the people than me, cuz no one ever knows what to say, except "I'm so sorry". I know I still don't know what to say to other people either when they have lost someone. Even though we know that 100 percent of people die, we still cannot prepare enough to be ready to go thru losing someone, IMO.