Which Do You Think Is More Rude?

[HeyHomie]

I was at a wedding this weekend where the bride & groom had politely and tactfully specified on the invitations that children under the age of 10 were not invited. Nevertheless, two families brought small children anyway.

Who do you think was more rude in this situation: the bride & groom, or the people who ignored their request?

 

[Mskedi]

The guests.

The couple have every right to request no children at their wedding.

 

[MomBlessedBy2]

In this situation, I think the people who brought the children were rude. Whether they agree with the bride/groom or not, it was their wedding and their rules. But, maybe something happened and they couldn't get a sitter and the bride/groom said to bring them.

Personally, I've never been to a wedding where children were not allowed. I've heard of it, but never understood it. When planning our wedding, I kept in mind at how many people coming would be bringing children. I made sure there was a menu for the them. It never occured to me to not let them come.

Lynn

 

[sarasarabobara]

the guests...it was specified ahead of time, whether they agreed or not.

 

[ItalianAngel]

I think its much ruder to bring children to a child-free wedding rather than to host a wedding and ask people not to bring children.

When a couple plan a wedding they have every right to invite whomever they want, children included or not.

blessings,
~Michele

 

[Addicted2~Jesus]

While I think weddin's should be celebrated by all cause that's sorta the point, at the same time, folks are invited to celebrate "wit" this couple an if they didn't want children there then so be it, jes my two cents.

 

[andiesmama]

We had a "child-free" wedding, however I arranged for childcare during the ceremony (in one of the church classrooms) for couples who brought their children. We didn't care if kids were at the reception or not, so that wasn't an issue.

 

[Redguard]

Our wedding ceremony was open to all.

But the reception had an age limit that was CLEARLY indicated on our invitations.

We got a lot of flack from people who wanted to drag their kids to the reception, but we held our ground (for the most part).

Our reasons? The venue that we had booked just wasn't a child-friendly environment. The last thing we wanted were for the 5 and 6 year olds to start getting restless, giving each other "the look" and then engaging in a game of hide and seek, or tag in the middle of a banquet hall.

We had about 2 guests decline the reception invitation as a result of our "no child" rule. C'est la vie.

 

[giddybiscuit]

It's definitely more rude to disrespect the wishes of the bride and groom. It's their event and regardless of how right or wrong it is to not invite children, it is their choice.

I didn't invite children (other than out of town guests and nursing babies) to my wedding. I wanted to, but we didn't have the space or the money for it. We had a very small wedding, actually. People at my church accused us of despising children, etc., which was pretty hurtful and stressful, but we didn't let them pressure us into doing what they wanted and nobody disrespected our wishes.

In general I think children should be included in weddings, and I wish we had been able to do it that way; but there can be exceptions and if people don't like it, they should keep that to themselves.

 

[Heart4Him]

I think it was more rude of the guests to bring them.

One thing that I was curious about, though, was if the ones who brought kids were somehow related to the bride/groom or the wedding party.

Just a thought...I've been to weddings/receptions where it was "adults only" but small children/babies that belonged to the bridesmaids or sister of the bride, etc..were allowed to be there because everyone related was IN the wedding, or present at the wedding, so they had no one to babysit.

 

[MERCY@GRACE]

I think it's more rude for the guests, BUT having said that, if the couple really wanted their prescence there and the kids were best behaved ....I probably wouldn't hold it against em. ALthough intially it sounded strange that would be a request.... I could understand the bride and groom wanting their wedding(especially the vows) to be free from babies crying kids whining etc. I personally think it's tacky to put that on a wedding invite, but I can definitely see the logic.

 

[beehoney]

To bring children to a child free wedding.

 

[icbeckyc]

I went to one that was like that. I took mine and they had daycare. Which was good. I don't take my kids though unless it is someone that they are close to. Especially when they were young. Now that they are teens I would expect themto be on the ivitation if we all are invited. Usually they come to Connor Family or they have been specifically listed on the invitation.

 

[rainygirl]

The couple specified how they wanted their wedding....so the guests were in the wrong!!!

 

[sioleabha]

I probably wouldn't go to a wedding that said no kids unless I was really close to the bride or groom. But I don't know anyone that I'm really close to who wouldn't invite my kids or ask them to be in the wedding. (My daughter was the bridesmaid at my husband's best friend's wedding last year. I made the dress and she was SO cute!) I had a really small wedding, and about half the invited guests were kids. It wouldn't have been a wedding without them, IMO.

That being said, I would NEVER bring my kids to an event that said "no kids." Especially not a wedding, which the bride and groom only get to do once. Specifically ignoring a bride and groom's request on practically any issue is very, very rude, IMO.

 

[Leanna]

They might have specifically asked the bride and groom because they either had to come with their kids or not at all, so I think that making assumptions about these people is a bad idea.

 

[megg]

Its there wedding, if they don't invite children, it would be completely rude to bring them.
If you can't find a sitter, don't go. I am sure that they will be expecting some not to come for that very reason.

 

[KillerV]

it was rude of the guests.

 

[lin1235]

We asked for no kids on our wedding invites - it's the norm here rather than the exception. I've probably been to about 10 weddings in the last 3 years and I can only remember 1 where the invite did not say "sorry, no children", and that one was a morning wedding with an outdoor picnic reception.

What we did do, however, was to individually approach invited guests who had small kids and tell them they were welcome to bring them - like my cousin who had a 3 month old baby and who would either come with the baby or not at all. She chose not to come, fearing that the baby may disrupt the event (and this had nothing to do with the fact that nobody else were bringing kids).

I believe the guests were in the wrong by ignoring the bride and groom's request. And I agree with whoever said that ignoring ANY request of the couple when attending a wedding is rude, no matter how unreasonable you think it is!

 

[firestar]

The people that ignored the request. It's a pet peeve of mine when people invite more people than were actually invited- regardless of the extra guests' ages. That happened at my wedding- friends who were invited brought their friends who weren't and we had very limited space!!