What's Your Birth Plan?

[Miss Spaulding]

This may seem like a really odd topic to discuss to some people, but it really interests me personally and I'm curious to know what other women on here think. I would say this thread would be more directed towards the women on Singles who hope to be mothers one day, but the men on here who hope to be fathers can certainly chime in on how they'd feel about their wives' choice method on birthing their children as well.

As some of y'all may know, I'm a firm believer in alternative medicine and methods to achieve overall good health. But not just that, I'm a huge advocate for natural deliveries when it comes to having children. I know going a natural route for some seems scary, risky, and extremely controversial. ...Which is why I thought it would be an interesting topic to discuss. I'd like to hear everyone's take, particularly the women's, on how they feel about certain ways of birthing and what they personally would like to do when and if they ever have their own children. ...Strictly a hospital birth? Birthing center? Perhaps a home delivery maybe? ...I'd like to know.

I'm not known for 'popular' threads, so this thread could die in no time, but at the same time it could take off. If it proves more successful than I expect it to be, then all I ask is this: I know that this can indeed be a controversial subject, so please be civil and respectful of everyone's opinion.

 

[leothelioness]

Good topic, Sharon.

This is something I've thought about a lot and have decided that I want to have a natural birth (no pain medication) and I would prefer to have my child(ren) delivered by a midwife or doula as opposed to a doctor. I do not want to be induced. I want my child to come when it is ready.

In all things I want nature to take it's course. It's when people start to mess with things to be more "convenient" that it all goes downhill.

 

[Miss Spaulding]

Good topic, Sharon.

This is something I've thought about a lot and have decided that I want to have a natural birth (no pain medication) and I would prefer to have my child(ren) delivered by a midwife or doula as opposed to a doctor. I do not want to be induced. I want my child to come when it is ready.

In all things I want nature to take it's course. It's when people start to mess with things to be more "convenient" that it all goes downhill.

I hear you!

Induction is merely a convenience. But is convenience always good? No, it's not. Some things, like 'going into labor', need to come on their own time. It's not only, and most importantly, healthier and less stressful for the baby, but also for the mother as well. The baby will come, so let the baby come when their good and ready.

Would you be comfortable delivering at home with your midwife/doula by your side? Or would you like it best at an actual birthing center? ...I know most women who prefer a natural birth like to go to a birthing center as opposed to being at home, which is certainly understandable when it's your first.

 

[EyesOfKohl]

I was born on a couch at home with a midwife assisting Apparently my mother preferred it to being in a hospital environment.

 

[PetLuv]

I believe I would go midwife or a Dr. who thinks in line with that sort of thing.

 

[Gnarwhal]

My mom had my sister and I in hospital with her OB/GYN present, no drugs or epidural or anything like that. She didn't have a sonogram for me either (she had to for my sister because there were some heart concerns during her pregnancy).

Pretty traditional and old school, IMHO. I'd like it if the woman I have kids with chooses that route, it's her call ultimately, but I think it's kind of indicative of how my family never goes to either extreme. Not too far on the holistic side, not to far on the pharmaceutical side.

 

[Sketcher]

My plan is whatever is healthy for her and the baby. And I understand that this can change with every pregnancy. The OB/GYN will help determine what the best course of action would be.

 

[High Fidelity]

Forgive my ignorance, but what are the risks with natural births? Do you mean in the absence of medical professionals? No pain medication?

 

[Gnarwhal]

Forgive my ignorance, but what are the risks with natural births? Do you mean in the absence of medical professionals? No pain medication?

No pain medication, but I'm also unsure if midwives are equipped to address hemorrhaging or other critical medical emergencies in the event that they happen.

 

[.Mikha'el.]

My plan is whatever is healthy for her and the baby. And I understand that this can change with every pregnancy. The OB/GYN will help determine what the best course of action would be.

This. I have no other thoughts on the topic.

 

[High Fidelity]

No pain medication, but I'm also unsure if midwives are equipped to address hemorrhaging or other critical medical emergencies in the event that they happen.

Ahh. I think that may be a bit too worrisome for me. I'd be too concerned for the health of the woman and the child.

 

[Gnarwhal]

Ahh. I think that may be a bit too worrisome for me. I'd be too concerned for the health of the woman and the child.

Yeah, that's why I'd encourage her to deliver at the hospital, just so if anything goes wrong it can be addressed quickly.

 

[High Fidelity]

Yeah, that's why I'd encourage her to deliver at the hospital, just so if anything goes wrong it can be addressed quickly.

I think I would need medical attention if I had to watch my wife and child go through that risk

It might just be a small risk, but my mind over-analyses things and I'd be riddled with worry and anxiety.

 

[Orange Crow]

Ahh. I think that may be a bit too worrisome for me. I'd be too concerned for the health of the woman and the child.

^this.

In my family it all was depending on the situation of the child and what it needed. Only 3 out of 9 were born at home.

 

[Bobthemotorcycle]

.

 

[Keri]

I do not want to be induced. I want my child to come when it is ready. In all things I want nature to take it's course. It's when people start to mess with things to be more "convenient" that it all goes downhill.

Not all inductions are a matter of convenience. My original due date was June 27th. By the time July 17th hit, I was three weeks late and my mother was extremely uncomfortable and I was growing pretty rapidly. She had had no contractions and there was no sign of me wanting to come out and her doctor decided that if labour didn't happen naturally by the 17th that he would induce.

Thankfully he made that call because I was 10lb 1oz and my mother is a small woman. She tore pretty badly, internally and externally and there was a risk of me getting stuck because my chest circumference was the same measurement as my head circumference. (My dad is very tall, with a large bone frame). If they had waited for it to happen naturally then my mom would have been pregnant an extra month and there could have been some major complications and risks for both her and I.

So, not all inductions are a matter of convenience. Some babies just don't want to leave the womb.




With all that said, plans don't always work out. Especially when it comes to babies. Should I ever give birth or should my partner give birth, I would like to go as naturally as possible but keep in mind that intervention might be necessary and not be too uptight about it. Also, I would prefer having a water birth. Don't care if it's in the home or birthing centre or hospital. Give me a warm bath and I'll be happy.

 

[Messy]

In Holland most women have a natural birth with a midwife at home. Fortunately the first one was with his head up and I told him: Don't move, just stay that way, so that was a painless cesarian. Next one was natural without medication in a hospital. My goodness how I hated that stupid woman who didn't want to give me something for the pain. Before I even conceived the third I had it all figured out. I went to a hospital in another town where they do give you an epidural. Terrific! I didn't feel a thing, they had to wake me up when he came and I felt nothing. I had been reading a book about supernatural painless deliveries, but she said: if you doubt better use medication, so I did.
I'm glad it wasn't at home because I lost extremely much blood and they had to give me blood.

 

[Miss Spaulding]

A woman can tear severely with any size child really. My sister did with her daughter and her daughter only weighed 6 lbs. (and my sis is a small person, too). A friend of mine delivered a few days ago and she tore so badly internally that she needed to be stitched at the ER...her baby was only a little over 6 lbs as well. So it's true that no pregnancy and delivery goes perfect to plan, all sorts of things could happen, but that kind of goes for any critical moment in one's life.

My point about inductions is true though in the grand scope of things - inductions are not that necessary. The baby will come sooner or later, big or small. They won't bake forever. ...However, again, not all deliveries are the same and sometimes we have to incorporate something conventional to help a troublesome situation. So I'm glad your mom could be helped with an induction, Keri.

 

[Miss Spaulding]

I'm actually pretty surprised by everyone's ease with natural birthing. It's cool though! ...I'll be adding my own two cents a little later.

 

[Cearbhall]

I'm a huge advocate for natural deliveries when it comes to having children. I know going a natural route for some seems scary, risky, and extremely controversial. ...Which is why I thought it would be an interesting topic to discuss. I'd like to hear everyone's take, particularly the women's, on how they feel about certain ways of birthing and what they personally would like to do when and if they ever have their own children. ...Strictly a hospital birth? Birthing center? Perhaps a home delivery maybe? ...I'd like to know.

I plan to adopt and have no biological children. If I change my mind, I'll definitely use drugs.

One of the contributing factors to my decision to not give birth is the fact that women's birth plans are so often ignored and their right to autonomy compromised during labor and childbirth (episiotomy without consent, pressured to do C-section, etc.), and there's very little the woman can do about it afterwards. Birthing centers seem to pretty much eliminate this risk, but I would really want the drugs.