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grandvizier1006

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Your youth is wasted on self-exploration, foolish mistakes, nihilism and melodramatic coming-of-age crap. In your 30s and 40s, you're older and wiser but not too old to be feeble, so you can enjoy things and relax.
 
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TheGirlOnFire

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When I hit my 30 two weeks ago everyone told me this...

I think it's because you know yourself better....
 
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Toro

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Your youth is wasted on self-exploration, foolish mistakes, nihilism and melodramatic coming-of-age crap. In your 30s and 40s, you're older and wiser but not too old to be feeble, so you can enjoy things and relax.

This. Everyone I know that married in their 20s, now has a divorce to their past.

Also having kids in your 20s means you have to either, put aside the typical 20s life style which COULD very well lead to later in life issues (Mid life crisis for example) because you missed out on youth. Or, you dont put it aside and do nothing but live the 20 somethings lifestyle at the expense of your child. (Speaking generally here)

If I married and had kids in my early/mid 20s, I would now be forever tied to a woman that became my stalker for a few years.

I would like to hurry up and meet the right woman. But, I felt that way in my 20s too and I would do so much better of a job picking the future Mrs Toro T Bull now than I would have then..... so if it doesnt happen soon. At least I will know Id most likely be better at picking than I would now. So if it happens, it happens. If not...... so be it.
 
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KandiJo

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Ugh. I have a rant, for if anyone wants to listen.
I honestly dislike my fathers girlfriend. I really do. Shes still married, they have been dating for nearly three years now. She's best friends with my cousin (which only happened when they visited my aunt after they started dating) but doesn't even try to talk to me. Instead she tells my dad I am trying to break them up and that I am never going to move out (umm, hello, I do want to move out but once I can be stable enough to move out) and basically blames it on me.
I just don't understand why I am always the problem. People at work blame things on me, my dads girlfriend, my mom. Why am I always the issue.
I never talk back, I am never rude to them. I never yell or say mean things to them, yet I am always the issue.
I hate this. Why would God put me here if I am always an issue. If I am always the problem. I hate it. I hate going on. I just wish I could be in heaven already.
But God has me here, and I don't know why.
Anyways, sorry, that kinda turned depressing.
 
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Travelers.Soul

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You don't need to apologize. I'm sorry, Kandi. I'm sorry that you are going through that and I wish I had all the right words and the answers. The only ones I have may sound cliche and I don't want that. You need truth and hope, not a cliche. You are not the issue, you are not the problem. I wish I could say what I really think about a couple that is in a relationship even while the woman is married but out of respect for you I will not. It wouldn't be helpful or beneficial to anyone anyway. I will be praying for you. I know telling you that won't make you feel better but it's true. May God grant you peace and comfort.
 
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TheGirlOnFire

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We all feel like this kandi trust me it just sometimes feel like it everything hits you at once. Have you tried sitting down and talking to your dads gf about this? She's probably feeling from you that you dislike her.

People at work blame things on you maybe be cause you don't talk up and so it's easier to pin it on you because they know you wouldn't say anything.
 
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Toro

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Im sorry Kandi.

I don't know those people around you, but if you ask me it seems THEY are the problem and love to blame others instead of taking responsibility for themselves.

My PMs are always open if you need.
 
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graciesings

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Awww, Kandi, I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling.

I think the most comforting thing I can say is that we all have these struggles with parents. It's hard for Christian youth to be respectful of adults who don't conduct themselves the way they should. It's also really depressing to watch adults act super immature... so you're not alone.

And you are not defined by what your father's girlfriend says about you. She can say mean things, but they aren't true. What matters at the end of the day is who you really are and what your real goals are. Stay true to yourself and your goals and don't let their criticism affect you, except for making you a better Kandi.

And anytime it would help to have someone to talk with, I'm here for ya.
 
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KandiJo

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Thanks guys.

She thinks because I live with my dad that I automatically dont want him to be dating anyone because I want him all to myself. She said when she was here (she lives in another state btw) that when I was saying that would be my room and I would paint it this color: ___.. That I was pushing her out.
Oh I am sorry. I was the one that got told to stay at my aunts house because you where coming down here. I am the one helping him pay his bills so he can buy a house. I have no problems with him dating. I want him happy.
I'm just tired. I can never be enough for everyone else and they just keep pushing me and pushing me.
I just want it all to end.
 
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Toro

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In the end, all you have to be enough for is yourself and God.

Just from what you said, it seems she is the incredibly jealous type that hates that he even has offspring at all because you arent hers. (So she sees you as a threat)

Her issues in life are not your fault.
 
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KandiJo

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I know, its just I am getting this from all sides, my whole life. My mom telling me I am not enough, work, my dads girlfriend. Its just hard.
I just want to curl up and tell everyone to be gone.
In a less pleasant way. With curse words.
 
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