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CodyFaith

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As long as I don't hear "I never knew you" I'll be satisfied enough (Still stuck in the phase of doubting my salvation status sometimes... speaking of fear haha)

Of course I'd love to know I did his will and used the short time we have on here to the fullest as well, and even though I still have doubts in things like my salvation status I still run the race and sow seeds.
 
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alsughasoughaiuyfygh

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I'm afraid of hearing this:

"You wicked and lazy dog! You failed me and everything I taught you! Why couldn't you be more like Billy Graham?! Your eternal occupation will be cleaning out the sewers of heaven! You'll live in the slums of Heaven! You will be segregated from everyone and will live like a second class citizen for the rest of eternity! I don't care if you are broken, you should have done a better job at life!"

Intellectually I know that this will likely not be the case but emotionally I don't. Living a screwed up life with everything and everyone against me has left me cynical about how I will finish this race.
 
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CodyFaith

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Ain't no such thing in heaven man.

Remember the verse
1 Corinthians 2:9
But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.

and if you believe in Jesus, he's your Lord. And if you believe in him and he's your Lord, you love him.
 
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MehGuy

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At least you get into heaven.. lol.
 
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alsughasoughaiuyfygh

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Like I said, intellectually I know the answer but emotionally I don't. Even after being officially saved I continue to do messed up things, desire selfish things, and now I'm pretty much doing nothing in life when there is that slight possibility that I could do something but am too afraid of doing it. I'm too undesirable for the world's rewards and I'm too sinful for Heaven's rewards. I don't expect Jesus to tell me I did a good job. I just expect the opposite.

I don't seek to be the governor of Heaven or anything. I'd just be happy with a well made cabin with plumbing, running water, and electricity for a home. I'd just be happy being a cartoonist in Heaven. I'd just be happy spending my eternity with a few close friends. Life has made me cynical indeed.

At least you get into heaven.. lol.

Maybe in Heaven I'll travel around with a shopping cart to collect gold beer cans from garbage bins to buy a can of beans that taste like a $100 steak from a five star restaurant.
 
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Travelers.Soul

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Yeah....none of us are going to be compared to Billy Graham or be chastened because we didn't do what Billy did. God only made one Billy Graham, one you, one me. Better to keep our eyes on Christ then to compare ourselves to others. Comparison is the thief of Joy.
 
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alsughasoughaiuyfygh

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Hard to do that when one grew up being the poster boy for eugenics that everyone hates while having a gifted and talented sibling who everyone loves.
 
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Paulie079

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Hard to do that when one grew up being the poster boy for eugenics that everyone hates while having a gifted and talented sibling who everyone loves.

You've just got to keep in mind that God sees you in a much different and better light than any person can. You need to keep preaching truth to yourself about your identity because like any human being, your inclination is going to be to believe that you have to somehow earn God's love and that's simply not the case. The reason you see yourself in such a poor light is that you don't believe you deserve heaven, and you would be right. The truth, though, is that God doesn't treat us according to what we deserve. In His grace He has promised you a place at His table.

Nothing you can do will make God love you more or less than He does now. He loves the current version of you as much as He loves the five-years-from-now, highly-improved version of you. He chose to pursue relationship with you knowing all of the wrong things you were going to do, and He doesn't regret it. He promised to complete the work that He began in you, and that's what He is going to do. That's a promise to grasp onto.
 
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alsughasoughaiuyfygh

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I'm going to get the best crown for being the most humble. It'll be amazing.

I'm going to get the crown of life for suffering the most.

I mean, my internet went out for an hour. I was this close to losing my sanity. Woe is me.
 
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Saucy

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I'm going to get the crown of life for suffering the most.

I mean, my internet went out for an hour. I was this close to losing my sanity. Woe is me.
Suffering for Jesus!
 
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alsughasoughaiuyfygh

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(Sigh) You're right about everything. I spent my entire life trying (and failing) to earn people's love that I assume God is the same way. It's not enough my mind is screwed up from birth but growing up in a crappy environment just makes it worse. I'm sorry. It's hard to shake off this skewed perspective.

Thank you, everyone. All your words bring much comfort to this black sheep.
 
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alsughasoughaiuyfygh

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OMM: Thinking about End Times persecution as predicted by the Bible.

https://www.opendoorsusa.org/christ...2014-the-worst-year-in-christian-persecution/
http://religionnews.com/2016/01/13/2015-worst-year-christian-persecution-says-open-doors/
Report: 2016 Was ‘Worst Year Yet’ for Christian Persecution
http://www.christianitytoday.com/gl...s-christian-persecution-world-watch-list.html

During the Antichrist's reign there will be persecution of Christians cranked up to an eleven. Would there be a specific reason for this persecution that would make sense to the secular world? Donald Trump has chosen his cabinet with many of them Christians and is reversing everything Obama has done during the last 8 years. This is possibly giving the world the impression that the US will become a Christian dictatorship. What's more is that with all this talk of World War III between China and the United States, I can see why so many people will start to resent Christianity for threatening world peace and stability.

It's going to take a major crisis for the Antichrist to take power and I think Donald Trump might be the one who creates this crisis. Since we were the ignorant, intolerant, bigoted Bible Thumpers that brought the world closer to nuclear annihilation, it would make sense that the world would be on board with killing Christians during those 7 terrible years.

Just a thought.
 
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Toro

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I so wish I could get back into writing fiction. I miss it so much. Writing a lot of non-fiction for clients just makes my mind tired.
Write a story about the bull...........

My rise to ......... the awesomes.....

My humble beginnings looking like the boy from A Christmas Story............. to......the bull of awesome.



I have super powers you know.......
 
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