What is Love?

[GenuineSunshine]

My boyfriend told me he loved me, and I know he's sincere, but I couldn't say it back....because I don't know what love is!

 

[Immanuel]

This sounds so familiar. I've been through this where I didn't know what love was because I haven't experience love. After a while of being hurt by my ex, I knew what love isn't. Then, when I met Jesus, I finally knew and experience what love is. and boy he swept me off my feet. My love is Jesus now.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. - 1 Corinthians 13:4-7


God is love. When you think about his undying, unselfish, endless love, nothing can every compare to that.

Love are not only words to be spoken, but they are also action. How many times did Jesus actually tell his diciples or anyone he loves them? Or even remember Jesus saying "I love you." Honestly, I don't remember if he did, but I do know that: "but God demostrates his own love in us that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." If that's not love, then I don't know what it is. LoL.

Here are some verses to ponder on.

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. -- 1 John 3:16

And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us. -- 1 John 4:16-19

Your love, O LORD , reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies. -- Psalms 36:5


This is it for now. I hope you will be blessed and I pray that in the name of Almighty Jesus that the confused be gone. The in his victorious name, may the Love of God be overflowing to you so that you will find no words to describe what love is because of your experience with our loving Lord and Savior.

 

[GenuineSunshine]

I understand that love; but I want to know what love between two people of the opposite sex is. There's so many different forms of love, like love between family, friends, God, people you don't know but your heart reaches out to, Christian love, etc. You know what I mean?
I can check off everything on the 1 Cor. 13 list with Mark....and a bunch of other people. But what makes it special with him?
Arg, is this making any sense?

 

[Living4Him03]

Love is a committment. It's a decision. Definitely more than just a feeling. Love between a man and a woman is special...you could read about the different couples in the Bible to find out more about love between men and women, as well as Song of Solomon. Eve was definitely special to Adam and vice versa. Love between a man and woman is unique! I personally think the "L" word should not be said unless you can make a committment along with saying it...proposing marriage.

 

[Immanuel]

I understand that love; but I want to know what love between two people of the opposite sex is. There's so many different forms of love, like love between family, friends, God, people you don't know but your heart reaches out to, Christian love, etc. You know what I mean?
I can check off everything on the 1 Cor. 13 list with Mark....and a bunch of other people. But what makes it special with him?
Arg, is this making any sense?

I apologize. I guess for you, you are looking at love in bf/gf relationship right?

I think in a bf/gf one, when u love someone, you are trying to push them to be the best them that God has made them to be. That when you go into the relationship. you are not seeking to get something out of it, but to bless the other person, and to give something to them. The bible doesn't say much about dating, but they do talk about marriage. YOU can take a look at some examples of Adam and Eve. Issac and Rebekah, Abraham and Sara.

God made us as relational beings. Boy, It would be easier to talk to u on phone. LoL. It's a lot to type and I could write an essay on it. But if you are interested, I have some stuff on the computer about dating and Love.

I hope I can help in anyway though.

Are you having trouble saying "I love you" back cause you're not sure? How long have you been w/ this person? Maybe you can message me.

 

[GenuineSunshine]

Well, when he said "I love you, Aly" my initial response was shock. It was unexpected. We just had a very serious conversation and were talking about how good it felt that we could share pretty much everything with each other. But the first thing I said, after I told him I was speechless, was, "What is love to you?" He paused a moment and replied, "Love is being there. Love is always having someone to talk to. Love is someone who knows what's wrong. Love is wanting to grow with that person. Love is looking at that special person and having the feeling you can't go anywhere else. Love is affection. Love is passion. Love is an intense liking. And much, much more." Then I said, "I'm not sure whether to say your definition of love is accurate or whether your only looking at this on one level." He just said, "Believe me or not, but I know what my heart says." Somewhere I said, "Love is more than a feeling, it's a decision." And more dialogue. Then he left to take a walk and clear his head. When he came back he said, "Love is a commitment." I thought that was rather impressive.

Well, he certainly is special to me, I know that. I'm not self-seeking in the relationship, I want to be there for him. In fact in a couple weeks I'll be supporting him at a memorial service for a friend of his who passed away a couple years ago. We talk about the future, and I don't mean just a week or months or even years away. Not to the extent of marriage though. Can you say you love someone without talking about marriage?

We've been dating a year. We started out as friends and got to know each other, though there was almost always a little edge to it. We've taken our relationship slow. Physical contact's been on the down low. It was 6 months (approx) until we started holding hands, and he put his arm around me the first time maybe a month ago. We haven't kissed. He's asked for a kiss, but I just said "maybe later." (It really wasn't the time or place for me. But what can I say, I'm a bit of a romance lover, lol)

Yeah, I really want to read that stuff you have about dating and love.

 

[Immanuel]

It sounds like you are giving him a challenge, which is good. Hehee. I was thinking about you this morning. One thing I was thinking is what was going through your mind when he told you "I love you"? Were u scared? Worried? I mean I dont know what has happened in your life, but some people can't say it back, cause they don't love, or they are scared. I'm not saying that bout you. i'm generalizing.

Don't worry about taking it slow though. God chosed us before the end of time to be holy and blameless in his sight. This couple in my church, they have been dating for like 5 or 6 years and their first kiss was at the altar. So don't worry. hehee

I hope things will work out for the best. Can I email you?

 

[mina]

I think true human love is pointing someone towards Jesus, and putting them before yourself.

 

[GenuineSunshine]

edited to remove email address

 

[empty_spaces]

my initial response was shock. It was unexpected. We just had a very serious conversation and were talking about how good it felt that we could share pretty much everything with each other.

Yes, i can relate to this, when someone told me this. :o I was confused, mainly because i wasn't sure what he meant. What on earth did he mean?

Love in todays society is overused, i myself am guilty of saying i love something, without knowing what i mean.

I had a discussion about this with a group of my friends once. I told them what i believed; that the ultimate, definitive love was pure, and only God could give it. I said that man man could never truly attain it, but tried to duplicate it in the four types of "love" mentioned (at least, i thought it was mentioned) but no man can ever truly love as God intended. Needless to say, no one else agreed with me.

So i too, am searching for what was meant when someone told me they loved me.

 

[Immanuel]

Talk about being pure. Has anyone read "Passion and Purity" By Elisabeth Elliot? I'm reading it now and it's pretty good. It talks about giving up everything for God and allowing God to control your love life.

 

[n3w3xp]

I have a friend who has been with her current boyfriend for I believe 3 years now... I asked her a while back, about saying the "L" word to each other. She told me that when her and her bf said it in the beginning it was just a thing to say because you're "supposed" to say it when you're in a relationship. Now it grew on them I guess.

For me, when a significant other told me that they love me, I responded with silence..and some awkward comment. My reason for this was because I was shocked, didn't know how to accept their love, was scared, and didn't know if I love them also or not. I think it also depends on when someone says the "L" word. I know most couples say it when they are getting physical or making out, and I personally don't believe it when they say it at that moment. It might just be the passion that took over their mind.

 

[charligirl]

I understand that love; but I want to know what love between two people of the opposite sex is. There's so many different forms of love, like love between family, friends, God, people you don't know but your heart reaches out to, Christian love, etc. You know what I mean?
I can check off everything on the 1 Cor. 13 list with Mark....and a bunch of other people. But what makes it special with him?
Arg, is this making any sense?

Our language only has one word for love, so it IS hard to define

In the bible there are 3 words for love and I believe that for a marriage relationship you need all three.

Philio - is friendship love.
Eros - is sexual/physical love which you can have feelings of (often the 'in-love' stuff of poems and films).. but obviously the sex bit should be saved for marriage.
Agape - The God love, the committment and covenant love the 'Come what may I CHOOSE to still love you' love

So many relationships start with eros and miss agape totally, jumping ship when the eros starts to dwindle!

I think the love in 1 Cor 13 is talking about agape, the love of choice, of committment, the love that says, 'you did wrong' or 'you look bad' or 'I don;t FEEL anything eros like today' but still chooses to love and show love and live out of 1 Cor 13.

So you can love a friend with philio and agape, the eros is the attraction that makes it different, once two people marry they cement that by making love and literally cutting covenant with each other.

What you have described sounds great, taking it slow and developing the agape and philio side of things is paramount... Eros can take time to mature and come out, which is the way it should be!

 

[Tangnefedd]

Talk about being pure. Has anyone read "Passion and Purity" By Elisabeth Elliot? I'm reading it now and it's pretty good. It talks about giving up everything for God and allowing God to control your love life.

How do you know the difference between God controlling your love life, and wishful thinking? I suppose if it all goes right God has done a good job, if it goes belly up God messed up! I really don't think God interfers in the world in that way!

 

[Immanuel]

How do you know the difference between God controlling your love life, and wishful thinking? I suppose if it all goes right God has done a good job, if it goes belly up God messed up! I really don't think God interfers in the world in that way!

when you ask how do you know the difference between God controlling your love life and wishful thinking? That's up to the individual and their relationship with God. I mean if you can't hear what God is trying to tell you, then you gotta take a look at your relationship with him.

But when someone accepts Christ, it's one of the principles that you give up your control of your life anyways. That's why we hand over our Lordship to Jesus.

But as far as if things go right, then God has done a good job and when things are wrong God messes up. No, i dont think that God messes up. For me, (I dont know about anyone else) when bad things happen, I praise God for them. There's been times where God has told me NO and I didn't get what I want, but I praise the Lord because he looks out in my best interest because he wants the best for me. But I had to trust him. When things go bad, I am the one that messes up, NOT God. THings go bad when I am not handing over my Lordship to him.

NOTE: This is in my case only. Not referring to anyone cause everyone's relationship with God is different.

Be Blessed

 

[KLLM82]

How do you know the difference between God controlling your love life, and wishful thinking? I suppose if it all goes right God has done a good job, if it goes belly up God messed up! I really don't think God interfers in the world in that way!

Isn't God concern in every area of our lives? Yes He is. People mess up by not letting God do what needs to be done.

~Katia~

 

[Warrior Poet]

Love, True Love is endurace. Its a choice. Its a bond. Its an action. Its a lifestyle. Its work.
I think this is the hard part though. Not saying it but meaning it. Actions speak louder then words. Love is not butterflies in your stomach, is not a tingly feeling you get, or a romantic notion of dying without that person. Its commitment, loyalty, work, choice, actions, conversations, laughs, cries, smiles, winks, footrubs, understanding, patience, endurance, keeping promises, hugs, squeezing of a hand, wiping of tears, listening with your heart not your ears, knowing without saying, giving up the last bite, dying to yourself, trust, and friendship. Its not words, its not kisses.

 

[mina]

Love, True Love is endurace. Its a choice. Its a bond. Its an action. Its a lifestyle. Its work.
I think this is the hard part though. Not saying it but meaning it. Actions speak louder then words. Love is not butterflies in your stomach, is not a tingly feeling you get, or a romantic notion of dying without that person. Its commitment, loyalty, work, choice, actions, conversations, laughs, cries, smiles, winks, footrubs, understanding, patience, endurance, keeping promises, hugs, squeezing of a hand, wiping of tears, listening with your heart not your ears, knowing without saying, giving up the last bite, dying to yourself, trust, and friendship. Its not words, its not kisses.

I agree

 

[Tenorvoice]

Love is NOT a feeling, it is an act of slefless sacrifice and anybody that is in existance with a need is worthy of it!!!

True love seeks not its own

Love does not do what it feels, it does what is right.

we are to love eachother the same way that Christ loved the Church ...He loved the Church before it existed, before time even began.

He gave the greatest gift to those who were the most unworthy.

if you love someone you can get mutual enjoyment w/o physical contact

and last if someone loves you they will not defile you by saying: if you ove me you will do __________.

 

[MrDude]

How do you know if your in love? Here's a hint, it's a lot like being the one.