what does this mean when a guy says...?

[OrangeHope]

my bf and i have been together for 4.5 months and a few weeks ago we were talking about how this are going for us and how great we are together and at one point he said "i'm so glad i met you....i think we were ment to be together, don't you"? that same night he said "tell me, would you like us to live together?"so about 2 week ago we were studying in his room and took and brake from math and just cuddled a bit and out of like nowhere he said "if we had kids, who do you think they would look, like what color hair and eyes they'd get from us?" o.k so i don't wanna over think but what would that mean to you guy? do you think he's already thinking about a future with me?

 

[Maeyken]

Yes. I would say he's thinking about a future with you. If you're in doubt of that though, definitely sit down and have a talk with him about it. Something like, "so, lately you've been talking a lot about the future. how do you see things happening?"

To me, it sounds as though he's curious what your feelings on the subject are.

 

[~Beauty_from_Pain~]

Yes, it could mean that. You know your guy best though. Is it a serious relationship? I heard once from a Christian speaker that some guys (and he used to do it to) will start to talk about kids, etc, just so that they can get to sex. But like I said, you know him. What type of guy is he? It's hard for other people to give input on these things because you gave limited info and so it could mean many things. Talk to him.

 

[joeman1]

Simply put and speaking from a guys point of view. He is hinting that he wants to be with you for the rest of his life. We guys can hint some but we just ain't no good at it as you can tell. Anyway like everyone else has said if you don't know how you feel yet just spend some time talking about the subject and tell him to slow down if you are not comfortable with that.

 

[keyz]

my bf and i have been together for 4.5 months and a few weeks ago we were talking about how this are going for us and how great we are together and at one point he said "i'm so glad i met you....i think we were ment to be together, don't you"? that same night he said "tell me, would you like us to live together?"so about 2 week ago we were studying in his room and took and brake from math and just cuddled a bit and out of like nowhere he said "if we had kids, who do you think they would look, like what color hair and eyes they'd get from us?" o.k so i don't wanna over think but what would that mean to you guy? do you think he's already thinking about a future with me?

It sounds like he wants to get into your pants.

 

[InTheFlame]

To me, it sounds as though he's THINKING about marriage (or living together... hmm). That doesn't mean he's decided he thinks it's a good idea.

 

[ChildOfGod20]

i think he wants to know if you think you two have a future together

 

[Boss_BlueAngels]

Here's how you know... you ask him not us. We hardly know you, let alone us knowing what he means by it.


It could mean he wants sex, it could mean he is thinking of a future with you, it could mean he was just curious, or it could mean he felt awkward and didn't know what else to ask.

The only thing everyone responding is doing is guessing.

 

[InTheFlame]

Here's how you know... you ask him not us. We hardly know you, let alone us knowing what he means by it.


It could mean he wants sex, it could mean he is thinking of a future with you, it could mean he was just curious, or it could mean he felt awkward and didn't know what else to ask.

The only thing everyone responding is doing is guessing.

WHAT? Come off it, where's the fun in THAT???

I've changed my mind. I think he's feeling you out re: moving to a commune and having 30 children, with the help of fertility drugs and multiple births.

 

[CarrierOfChrist]

my bf and i have been together for 4.5 months and a few weeks ago we were talking about how this are going for us and how great we are together and at one point he said "i'm so glad i met you....i think we were ment to be together, don't you"? that same night he said "tell me, would you like us to live together?"so about 2 week ago we were studying in his room and took and brake from math and just cuddled a bit and out of like nowhere he said "if we had kids, who do you think they would look, like what color hair and eyes they'd get from us?" o.k so i don't wanna over think but what would that mean to you guy? do you think he's already thinking about a future with me?

He is obviously interested in the possibility of spending the rest of his life with you. I mean, if he's thinking that far ahead already about your future together.

I'm curious about the part where he said "tell me, would you like us to live together?" Was he more specific (living together after marriage)? I'd be a bit worried if he's thinking about moving in with you before marriage. I wasn't sure.

I pray that God shows you and your boyfriend His will for the both of you.

 

[OrangeHope]

thanks guys, my guy knows no sex till marriage. and yeah we want to try to live togther befor marriage, i can see how it would worry you guy, it's just that i can't stand living with my mom (he can't stand living with his mom any more) she puts me down so much and i'm almost 21 and i should be on my own by now and if i move out i rather have a roomate i trust like my bf.now thinking back at it he was resting his head on my tummy and then out of nowhere like i said asked me how our kids would look like.boss, i doubt thats only what he wants from me, see befor me i had none believer gf's, since he's been with me he's come to know so much more about god than he ever did and think i set him on a good path, he still has to learn much more befor calling himself a christian but i feel he's really getting there, from the start he knew no sex and he said he'd wait till marriage.as for i the question if i can see a future with him the anser is yes, very much, like when he asked what our kids would look like i played along, a bit befor he asked i too was sort of wondering what our kids would look like if we had some.

 

[chocolateloverjen]

my bf and i have been together for 4.5 months and a few weeks ago we were talking about how this are going for us and how great we are together and at one point he said "i'm so glad i met you....i think we were ment to be together, don't you"? that same night he said "tell me, would you like us to live together?"so about 2 week ago we were studying in his room and took and brake from math and just cuddled a bit and out of like nowhere he said "if we had kids, who do you think they would look, like what color hair and eyes they'd get from us?" o.k so i don't wanna over think but what would that mean to you guy? do you think he's already thinking about a future with me?

well it sounds like he is. i'd be happy bout it

 

[keyz]

thanks guys, my guy knows no sex till marriage. and yeah we want to try to live togther befor marriage, i can see how it would worry you guy, it's just that i can't stand living with my mom (he can't stand living with his mom any more) she puts me down so much and i'm almost 21 and i should be on my own by now and if i move out i rather have a roomate i trust like my bf.now thinking back at it he was resting his head on my tummy and then out of nowhere like i said asked me how our kids would look like.boss, i doubt thats only what he wants from me, see befor me i had none believer gf's, since he's been with me he's come to know so much more about god than he ever did and think i set him on a good path, he still has to learn much more befor calling himself a christian but i feel he's really getting there, from the start he knew no sex and he said he'd wait till marriage.as for i the question if i can see a future with him the anser is yes, very much, like when he asked what our kids would look like i played along, a bit befor he asked i too was sort of wondering what our kids would look like if we had some.

Well another way to look at it is that he knows you've said no sex till marriage. Marriage is a commitment. Perhaps he thinks he can dish out a whole lot of promises so he can get close to you and then have sex with you.

Ultimately, I'm just taking a stab (guess). You have to find out what he means by it and he could lie. But to ask about living together before marriage, having kids, and thinking you have a future together... that sounds a bit odd to me... especially since you've only been in relationship with him for four months and he doesn't share your beliefs as far as God and sex being sacred in marriage. Sure he may understand them to a certain extent but he won't share them.

I've known some guys to do that.. make a whole lot of promises that are really out there and then the girl just melts and she thinks it's love.. but really it's manipulation... and ya you know the rest of the downhill spiral. He unbeliever.. he doesn't understand your no sex rule to the extent you know it with your relationship between God. You have to understand he's probably been burning with a passion to have sex with you ever since he met you.

I'm just saying becareful.. those are some very odd and bold things to say in a 4 month relationship. Becareful what situations you put yourself in. Living together would definitely not be wise.. definitely not.

 

[OrangeHope]

thanks keyz,i understand you concerne, i would be too but we both would like to live on our own, personaly i don't think i can stand living with my mom any more, and he makes me feel so comfortable around him. from the start i checked to see just what kind of a guy he is, i made sure he let me pay some times too even though when we go out he always pays but you know i wanted to make sure he wasn't the kind of guy he would turn out to be controling. by foot he live 25 mins away and when it's dark out side he'll walk me till my house just to make sure nothing happens to me. just so many signs that he really loves me and never use me. thinking of it i'd rather live together befor getting married cause we're only together 4.5 months and it would be even more odd if we got married now.

 

[Maeyken]

If you're ready to live together, you should be ready to be married. At least that's what I think. If you're serious about moving out, there are other ways to do it besides living with your bf. I understand that you want to live away from home, but there are many ways to find female roommates that you could live with for a year or 2 until you're ready to get married (and he could find male ones if he really wants to move out too)

To me, it sounds as though you are making excuses for wanting to live together. Besides the sexual aspects, there are other things that I think should be reserved for marriage... like just living in the same house, and all the intimacy that comes from that.

I'm curious- why do you think it's ok to live together before marriage?

 

[OrangeHope]

I'm curious- why do you think it's ok to live together before marriage?

i donno...no one ever told me it's not o.k.....i knew this one christian couple (now married) who also wanted to move out of their parents house and lived together, they said on some level it did help them see how it was living together befor marriage (like how they get along together in the same house for 24\7)i don't think it's bad, you just have to stick to your standards.though i'm just wondering if you think it's bad living together i would like to hear your opinion about why it is, and how should i tell this to my bf?

 

[millihelen]

I think that he could be thinking about the future with you and not just be thinking about sex, my bf and I started talking about stuff like that not long into our relationship but I suppose the difference is we are both Christians so we share the same values about it all.

The reason I wouldn't live together before marriage is because I think theres an intimacy that develops when you are living together as bf and gf even if you are not sleeping together. Just think how you would feel if you'd taken that step of moving in together and then it didn't work out, even though you'd not slept together you'd still have experienced a deep level of intimacy with someone who wasn't your husband. I suppose it could work for you though I mean everyone is different, but personally I want to save all that stuff for marriage, I want it to all be a new adventure when we get married not just the same as before but with sex involved.

 

[Boss_BlueAngels]

WHAT? Come off it, where's the fun in THAT???

I've changed my mind. I think he's feeling you out re: moving to a commune and having 30 children, with the help of fertility drugs and multiple births.

haha!

Well she evidently didn't read all of my post, so I change my original idea and agree with you too!

 

[OrangeHope]

^ i'v read it, though it's not so nice to say we'll have 30 children, with the help of fertility drugs.... we both stay far away from drugs, nor do we even smoke. we share alot in common, and i think we all deserve a chance, maybe i shouldn't have gotton involed with a none-believer but the fact is i did and maybe god got us together for a reason, maybe he plans for my bf as a believer but he needs my help to lead my bf to christ.

 

[keyz]

^ i'v read it, though it's not so nice to say we'll have 30 children, with the help of fertility drugs.... we both stay far away from drugs, nor do we even smoke. we share alot in common, and i think we all deserve a chance, maybe i shouldn't have gotton involed with a none-believer but the fact is i did and maybe god got us together for a reason, maybe he plans for my bf as a believer but he needs my help to lead my bf to christ.

God can very well use a situation in some form or another, but I have to wonder since he forbids us to be yoked with nonbelievers. You know that right? You're walking on dangerous ground whether or not you can see that.