What do I do with this?

[hope4today]

This thread comes out of FNG's 'Am I missing out thread'. Some things were said in there about the chemistry and 'that fluttery feeling'.

At the moment I have been having that feeling about someone however there is a big complication. It is a person I have met on an internet board. This hasn't happened to me before. I have been chatting on boards now for about 3 years and have met many men on them, many of whom are really nice people, and I may have even taken a little note of them, but that has been the extent of it. The same with this person, until now when all of a sudden I seem to react in my heart when I read their posts etc.
This is really crazy. I don't really even know this person but ever since I have met them on the board I always enjoyed reading their posts and felt they had a relationship with God that I enjoyed hearing. It is totally illogical because in reality I know very little about the person and so how can I be reacting like this?

My question is, what the heck do I do with this weird feeing? I mean, I have just been trying to let it go and kind of ignore it but it is a bit frustrating and distracting. I feel I have to keep doing that until it goes away...but does it? I have no reason to believe they have noticed me any more than anyone else and in fact may have reason to believe they have noticed me less. And of course, as is usually the case on boards (because most people on boards are from the States and I'm from 'Down Under') they are on the other side of the world to me so it is even more ridiculous.

Have any of you single girls ever felt that way about someone on an internet board before? If so, what did you do about it? Did it settle down?

I know there are probably no real answers but I was feeling the need to 'get it out' and I trust the people here. And it might help if some of you can relate to what I am seeing at the moment as a little crazy and schoolgirlish.

***Big sigh....got that out....

oh..and

 

[Jenster]

Have any of you single girls ever felt that way about someone on an internet board before? If so, what did you do about it? Did it settle down?

Congratulations for being human, hope. I do know what you mean, and I also have taken notice of men on various online boards.

What can I say? Does the feeling go away? For me, yes, if I don't sense any reciprocity. I also remind myself, as you are doing for yourself, that I only know one part of the person. As with crushes, our minds tend to "fill in" the gaps, and even attribute characteristics to the person that don't exist. For example, I may assume that just because a person likes opera, he must be well-versed in literature too, which may not be the case. He may HATE reading. Or just because he says he's close to his mom, that doesn't mean he's got a great relationship with everyone in his family.

As long as you can take your feeling for what it is, infatuation, there is perhaps nothing too wrong with riding out a crush. If you start experiencing negative feelings, perhaps submitting the crush to the Lord in prayer would be helpful.

But I've tried to take these types of feelings for the positive aspects that come with them. You clearly connect with someone in some way. Perhaps you might benefit from figuring out what that connection is all about. It could help you learn more about yourself and what you value in a mate.

You might also wish to be open to how God could use you in this person's life. Maybe you would have a word of encouragement (as long as it's sincerely motivated of course) that the person needs sometime.

Hope that helps. Don't worry -- you're not alone in this.

ETA: Thanks for trusting us with it, hope. I for one am honored.

 

[eatenbylocusts]

Yes, that's happened before. I was attracted to the Christian maturity and wisdom in his posts. The timing was never right with both of us in and out of relationships and I probably missed an opportunity..... wasn't meant to be I guess.

 

[hope4today]

Thanks Jenster

What you said makes sense and is wise. I agree and know it in my head but my heart isn't so sure and can't help but think..maybe?...could it be possible?...Oh my goodness...where did that maturity I'm meant to have go?

EBL, so did he ever know how you felt?

 

[ido]

I definitely have experienced situations where I am drawn to the words on the page and, therefore, drawn to the person posting them. It does leave me curious to know more about the person and I appreciate opportunities that arise that allow that to happen.

I don't think there is anything wrong with feeling that way as long as we keep a healthy perspective on the situation.