What are you most afraid of?

[Armistead]

I talked with someone today who was just told they were dying
of terminal cancer. I listened to his fears. He is only 46, wife, kids...
He is a Christian...but said when the words came...4 months, maybe a few more...he said he felt panic... The unfairness of not raising his children, knowing that one day his wife will move on.....

Are we all really terrified of dying. If so, is it the cause more than the
fact?

What are you most afraid of and how do you deal with it?

 

[IndomitableAmy]

I'm not sure if I'm terrified of dying or not.. I haven't thought about it recently and I can't remember thinking about it.. and I don't see how it's worth my thought. It's going to happen sometime. And, um, your next sentence didn't make any sense to me.

Personally, what I'm afraid of most at the moment is having instances of forgetting a great deal about my life very close together, say a week or two apart, at least while I'm in an unstable place. The things of which I speak actually happen to me.. from time to time, as I understand. I can't remember past the last one, you see.. at least not without being reminded; I might could remember a bit then. Where I am right now, the people who would take care of me if I needed are unreliable, let's say. If stuff like this keeps happening so close together I can't begin to get over it, to feel like I know my world, to feel safe.. then it strikes me as some kind of psychological torture ...that I wouldn't be able to do anything about. Right now, that's what scares me most, probably because it's been two and a half weeks since such a thing happened. I don't expect many others to be afraid of such a thing.

How do I deal with it? Hm. Largely, I don't.. I have more pressing things to deal with. I did mention it to someone I trust.. but that person doesn't know what to do. I guess I just hope that if it comes to that, I'll be somewhere more stable, somewhere I could get by well enough no matter the condition of my memory. Or else a plan for the case of this happening. I just can't worry that much. If nothing else, sort of like it says in Matthew, I believe... there's enough trouble today.

*Note: I'm currently uncomfortable with religious talk directed personally at me. Pray for me if you wish, but please do not tell me about it, or what God wants for me, or what I should do/believe religiously speaking.*

 

[Linus]

I'm not afraid of dying because then, I will be with Jesus Christ and there will be no more sorrow but I really don't want to die. I'm blessed with a wonderful wife and I hope and pray for the blessing of kids in the future. I also want to grow closer to God and see what plan He has with my life.

 

[Celticflower]

I'm not so much afraid of death as of the process of dying. It is purely a physical thing. And I do worry sometimes about the ones I'll leave behind. My husband says he often prays that we will die together because he couldn't see leaving me to go on alone and he doesn't want to go on without me.

 

[Apollo Celestio]

Most afraid of, I don't know. So many options, but I don't think any of them stand out..
Losing my mind, failure, death, eternal incompetence, uncertainty, social inability, tomorrow..

 

[HuntingMan]

I talked with someone today who was just told they were dying
of terminal cancer. I listened to his fears. He is only 46, wife, kids...
He is a Christian...but said when the words came...4 months, maybe a few more...he said he felt panic... The unfairness of not raising his children, knowing that one day his wife will move on.....

Are we all really terrified of dying. If so, is it the cause more than the
fact?

What are you most afraid of and how do you deal with it?

I think its just my wife and family I worry about. I thought Id be afraid to die before, but when I was actually close to death it wasnt really scary at all....other than the family thing.
Laura is only 25...its hard to think about her being left without a husband so young since Im so much older than she is and she doenst have a lot of family at all (you can literally count her entire family on two hands and most of them dont live anywhere near here).

Ive been ready for death for some time, I could take it or leave it. But leaving my wife behind, not seeing my new grandson for 20 years or so like my grandfather had with me, that would be a bummer.

 

[Dat_1_Chiq]

I am most afraid of dying without doing something great. Changinging the world or having some type of positive effect on some one. I have seen people die miserable. I don't want to die like that. I am not afriad of dying I am more afriad of failing even though i have done it hundreds of times.

 

[Armistead]

I think its just my wife and family I worry about. I thought Id be afraid to die before, but when I was actually close to death it wasnt really scary at all....other than the family thing.
Laura is only 25...its hard to think about her being left without a husband so young since Im so much older than she is and she doenst have a lot of family at all (you can literally count her entire family on two hands and most of them dont live anywhere near here).

Ive been ready for death for some time, I could take it or leave it. But leaving my wife behind, not seeing my new grandson for 20 years or so like my grandfather had with me, that would be a bummer.

Yea, I lived on the verge of death for about two weeks. I only had a few days to think about it, before they put me in induced coma. I was afraid before they put me out, that may be my last look at my wife. It was wonderful when I came out...I just didn't remember much...It may be selfish, but I do hope I go before my wife and like most...before my children.

I guess my biggest fear is not taking care of my family. I have Lupus, sometimes it's bad, sometimes not..may die next year or live to 80.
I'm doing all I can to make sure they will be taken care of should I not
be here

Having faced death sort of...I do believe once you get past the intial shock,,,grace sets in....and really dying doesn't hurt.

My friend that is dying...they obvious were not ready for it...no life insurance, wife no job...and they had little to start with. I think his nerves
will kill him before the cancer. He just cries like a helpless baby..His kids were his life and he feels robbed...and right now hates God. I just don't know what to do except listen and pray with him and working on setting up a fund for his wife. Pray for him....

 

[cCensor]

I talked with someone today who was just told they were dying
of terminal cancer. I listened to his fears. He is only 46, wife, kids...
He is a Christian...but said when the words came...4 months, maybe a few more...he said he felt panic... The unfairness of not raising his children, knowing that one day his wife will move on.....

Are we all really terrified of dying. If so, is it the cause more than the
fact?

What are you most afraid of and how do you deal with it?

So I got to say that I have never been afraid of death.
Right now I am dieing and having a good time. God has alway taken care of me and I know He will be there when I leave you all.

So there is no fear in my heart, but I can say that I am sad for many of you. Why? Most of you really don't know God's heart and many may not ever know.

With Respect. Censor

 

[Armistead]

So I got to say that I have never been afraid of death.
Right now I am dieing and having a good time. God has alway taken care of me and I know He will be there when I leave you all.

So there is no fear in my heart, but I can say that I am sad for many of you. Why? Most of you really don't know God's heart and many may not ever know.

With Respect. Censor

What are you dying from? Your off base to feel sad for us or to think
most don't try to understand the heart of God. I'm in many groups of people that suffer with illness, die from it, ect. Most are concerned not
with themselves, but with the well being of the ones they leave behind, not just having a good time. Many suffer in terrible pain, not able to have
a good time.

 

[cCensor]

What are you dying from? Your off base to feel sad for us or to think
most don't try to understand the heart of God. I'm in many groups of people that suffer with illness, die from it, ect. Most are concerned not
with themselves, but with the well being of the ones they leave behind, not just having a good time. Many suffer in terrible pain, not able to have
a good time.

I see that you have strong opinions of those who are ill. And that I am off base and that most around here do not understand the heart of God.

I have known God for a long time and He has always taken care of me. Never had a cold or flue, but now have congestive Heart failure. So you are upset with me having a good time. I guess it is how you look at some one having a good time. If you look around you will always find some who doing worst then you or better. Some one who is worst pain or in less.

So I am to feel like you do. Even though you do not know how I feel and what make me happy. You do not think I should feel sorry for those who do not know the heart of God. I hope you have understand that many on this CF don't even know God. If you think I should care more for those I leave behind then those who are around here, then you may not understand the heart of God.

I don't have a problem with your opinion and you have every right to express it, even when it wrong.

With respect....Censor

 

[Armistead]

I see that you have strong opinions of those who are ill. And that I am off base and that most around here do not understand the heart of God.

I have known God for a long time and He has always taken care of me. Never had a cold or flue, but now have congestive Heart failure. So you are upset with me having a good time. I guess it is how you look at some one having a good time. If you look around you will always find some who doing worst then you or better. Some one who is worst pain or in less.

So I am to feel like you do. Even though you do not know how I feel and what make me happy. You do not think I should feel sorry for those who do not know the heart of God. I hope you have understand that many on this CF don't even know God. If you think I should care more for those I leave behind then those who are around here, then you may not understand the heart of God.

I don't have a problem with your opinion and you have every right to express it, even when it wrong.

With respect....Censor

I have no problem with people being happy or having a good time. I had
one friend that died of cancer a few years ago at 32. Many of us chipped
in, so he could do as much as he wanted before he died...sorta like the movie the bucket list...

However, to imply someone may not know God because they go through
panic, fear or saddness over dying is simply insensitive and shows a lack
of understanding of humanity. Because people love as God commands, there is often unbearable saddness at the loss of a loved one...Would you
be happy and have a good time if you're children were murdered? I expect not.

Knowing the heart of God is accepting his grace, even through fears or panic..

Even Christ cried out " My God why have you forsaken me"...Would you say he didn't know God, while in his humanity, like most humans...he cried out basically..."God, where are you."

I think you have a lot to learn about....knowing God.

 

[Tavita]

Many suffer in terrible pain, not able to have
a good time.

It's easy for me to say I don't fear death, but I haven't faced it yet. Usually God gives grace for a certain situation when we need it, not beforehand. If you look at Fox's Book of Martyr's those people went through some terrible things, but with joy and peace given to them at the right time... that's what I trust God for. That He'll give me His peace and grace when I need it.

My husband is dying too with a disease that is long, slow, painful and uncomfortable. He had a bone marrow transplant for leukemia about twelve years ago and contracted Graft Versus Host Disease. It means his immune system tries to kill him. The medications he needs to control this disease are killing him now too. And the effects on his body are absolutely terrible, the doctor's don't know how to treat him anymore, and nothing heals the Graft Versus Host Disease. Most people lose the disease within a year or two of the transplant, or die. My husband has suffered with it for twelve years.

He has periods of fear, of anger, of frustration and also of peace and faith towards God... he's only human, and he doesn't deny the feelings he has. I know that at the time he needs it God will take away any fear and give him His perfect peace.

I think one of the greatest ways to know God's heart is to suffer.

 

[Armistead]

It's easy for me to say I don't fear death, but I haven't faced it yet. Usually God gives grace for a certain situation when we need it, not beforehand. If you look at Fox's Book of Martyr's those people went through some terrible things, but with joy and peace given to them at the right time... that's what I trust God for. That He'll give me His peace and grace when I need it.

My husband is dying too with a disease that is long, slow, painful and uncomfortable. He had a bone marrow transplant for leukemia about twelve years ago and contracted Graft Versus Host Disease. It means his immune system tries to kill him. The medications he needs to control this disease are killing him now too. And the effects on his body are absolutely terrible, the doctor's don't know how to treat him anymore, and nothing heals the Graft Versus Host Disease. Most people lose the disease within a year or two of the transplant, or die. My husband has suffered with it for twelve years.

He has periods of fear, of anger, of frustration and also of peace and faith towards God... he's only human, and he doesn't deny the feelings he has. I know that at the time he needs it God will take away any fear and give him His perfect peace.

I think one of the greatest ways to know God's heart is to suffer.

Sorry to hear that Tav, it can be tough on all. I often go through that cycle. I deal well, then the meds, pain, ect...just bring me down. Then I will pull myself back up. Overall, no one would guess I deal with what I do.
I certainly have been luckier than most dealing with my illness. As stated,
some of the meds can do wierd things to you. I do plan to live to be an old man.

Certainly I believe in the aspect, as much as possible, being as happy as
you can be. There is a lot of medical proof that a positive attitude, dealing with stress, can even help heal disease. I know if I let
my stress get to me, I will relapse, so I try and keep positive and laugh
as much as possible. Laughter is a great pain reliever.

I often work at a camp where children suffering from terminal
or severe illness can go. They can ride horses, canoe, fish, many thing
planned for their enjoyment. Even if only for periods of time, it's amazing
to see the smiles and laughter over the pain and stress they deal with.
If having a good time relates to that...then I would basically agree. Still
noting they deal with fear.

Suffering does bring us closer to God and the bible clearly states God can use it for that purpose. James tells us to endure our trials with faith and
run the good race.

 

[cCensor]

I have no problem with people being happy or having a good time. I had
one friend that died of cancer a few years ago at 32. Many of us chipped
in, so he could do as much as he wanted before he died...sorta like the movie the bucket list...

However, to imply someone may not know God because they go through
panic, fear or saddness over dying is simply insensitive and shows a lack
of understanding of humanity. Because people love as God commands, there is often unbearable saddness at the loss of a loved one...Would you
be happy and have a good time if you're children were murdered? I expect not.

Knowing the heart of God is accepting his grace, even through fears or panic..

Even Christ cried out " My God why have you forsaken me"...Would you say he didn't know God, while in his humanity, like most humans...he cried out basically..."God, where are you."

I think you have a lot to learn about....knowing God.

So you want me to feel your pain! You want me to know how it would feel to loose my kids. Well I lost my grand father in 48, and my father in 68, brother in 78, and my mother in 88. Let's see its now 2008.

Who and how many have to die to make you happy?

I am happy because I have my God near me and I don't worry about death for the same reason. I am not going to die one second before God wants me too.

I will be in no more pain then God thinks I can handle.

God will not allow any more death in my life then I can take. Also I will not allow any way one in my life to make me feel ill.
Now I never said that some one who is ill does not Know God any more then some one who is not ill does know God. Pain does not find God.

I am happy because God has given me all I need. That may make you unhappy, but that is life.

With respect. Censor

 

[Armistead]

So you want me to feel your pain! You want me to know how it would feel to loose my kids. Well I lost my grand father in 48, and my father in 68, brother in 78, and my mother in 88. Let's see its now 2008.

Who and how many have to die to make you happy?

I am happy because I have my God near me and I don't worry about death for the same reason. I am not going to die one second before God wants me too.

I will be in no more pain then God thinks I can handle.

God will not allow any more death in my life then I can take. Also I will not allow any way one in my life to make me feel ill.
Now I never said that some one who is ill does not Know God any more then some one who is not ill does know God. Pain does not find God.

I am happy because God has given me all I need. That may make you unhappy, but that is life.

With respect. Censor

Why would I be unhappy because you feel God has given you all you need.

The bible is full of verse stating suffering and pain bring people to God, just as God would not remove Paul's condition to keep him humble.

Stop making silly blanket statements that I want you to loose your kids or " Who and how many have to die to make you happy." I don't even see the sense or purpose in it. I was stating there are facts that bring people to despair, regardless of how strong they may think their faith is.

You seemed confident that most here do not know the "heart of God"
because you can be happy in your suffering or because they may lack
happiness in their suffering. That is where we differ. Let God judge those
that deal with suffering..unless you also know the mind of God and can also judge who does and doesn't know the "heart of God."

Again, Christ felt rejected on the cross.....you can't ignore that fact.

Let's just agree to disagree.....time to move on.

Peace...

 

[marksman315]

To answer the OP, I most scared of snakes, worms, and getting my blood drawn. Well, there is the fear of how I would die. The more painful it is the scarier it is. However, to follow the line of death and dying, I am not afraid of death for myself. I have been more afraid of the possibility of living alone the rest of my life than actually dying. The only reason I would be afraid of dying now is that it would severely hurt my fiancee, and I want to be there for her and be the greatest husband I could ever be for her. There is so much promise there for me starting my life over again, and I don't want her life to suffer without me being around.

There have been so many times that I have wished for God to just take me home. Plenty of pain and anguish in my life, but there are plenty of others that have it a lot worse than me so I should not complain much.

Others have mentioned about God not giving us more than we can handle. I have read this in the Bible, too, and that has gotten me through some situations knowing that I should be able to handle what I am going through at those times, but it still is really hard, and the wish to be with God in Heaven is extremely strong.