Wanting to lose your virginity?

[Ave Maria]

My significant other says he wishes he wasn't a virgin. What can I say to him?

 

[chilibowl]

Why?

 

[swordsman]

once he loses his virginity...then what? has he conquered the world? no. has he accomplised a great feat in mankind? no.

The world we live in is so sex-crazed, and it's hard to be pure. Virginity is something so beautiful and innocent.

Tell him that I AM A VIRGIN!! ....and I LOVE IT!!! There is so much for me to do before I find a girl, get married and have children. Also tell him to do something constructive, and leave behind a legacy....sing to the Lord, give Him praise! Give a street bum a dinner treat! Help out a fellow brother/sister in Christ! Hold bible discussion talks with a youth group, or your friends, and do something fun together, like bungee jumping!

What I'm trying to say is that sex isn't the only thing in life, and even though I have not experienced it, I don't see anything special about premarital sex. It doesn't benefit a person from what I know.

 

[madison1101]

Have him read 1 Corinthians 6. Romans 12:1-2. Let God's Word speak to him.

 

[Ave Maria]

He says it's very tough to be a virgin when everyone else isn't one. I am not a virgin and he doesn't like it that I am not a virgin when he is. I can't talk to him now though. He's gone for three months. All we can do is pray for him.

 

[doofus125]

My significant other says he wishes he wasn't a virgin. What can I say to him?

Well, from reading some other posts of yours.....is it possible that he feels like that when the time comes for you two together that he may feel inadiquate or inexperienced and he's feeling that if he had experience in the past that he would know how to satisfy you? If that's the case tell him not to worry, the first few times will be awkward, it is for almost every guy because it happens so quickly. I know that some of us worry about that first time, it's nothing to be ashamed of because we have all been there (or will be).

 

[Ave Maria]

Well, from reading some other posts of yours.....is it possible that he feels like that when the time comes for you two together that he may feel inadiquate or inexperienced and he's feeling that if he had experience in the past that he would know how to satisfy you? If that's the case tell him not to worry, the first few times will be awkward, it is for almost every guy because it happens so quickly. I know that some of us worry about that first time, it's nothing to be ashamed of because we have all been there (or will be).

That may be the case. I honestly have no idea.

 

[Fatolia]

I have that desire too, to lose my virginity, but I know that it is only a desire of my flesh. There has to be a desire greater, one to serve the spirit. Mind over matter.

 

[Anti Existance]

That if he would love you that he would be willing to wait for you. If he says yes i will wait for you, then he really loves you. If he says im not willing to wait, then he wants you just for your body and doesn't love you.

 

[*Lana*]

That if he would love you that he would be willing to wait for you. If he says yes i will wait for you, then he really loves you. If he says im not willing to wait, then he wants you just for your body and doesn't love you.

I totally agree with you! I am 17 and still a virgin and I am proud. and yes I sometimes struggle, but I know its worth waiting for, I want my husband to make love to me, not just sex. I will for him!

 

[Aalbiel]

Only when you are ready. Period.

 

[JC 101 FM]

Christian or not, guys will say anything to get into a woman's pants when they fall into sin...

Sounds like a guilt trip attempt to me sister...don't cave in! Stay Clothed! 4 u guys.

 

[Chajara]

Can you really blame him? His body screams at him to go and have sex, just like most other guys. He's probably just hitting a rough spot in the waiting game for marriage and brought it up in an attempt to get your support. Just reassure him and tell him it's fine for him to want to be having sex... but it's not okay to act on it if you've agreed to wait until marriage.

The way I look at it, is if you don't want to deal with a guy's hormones and sexual drive, then don't date guys (Which means for those of us that are straight you shouldn't date at all.) You just have to help him through it.

 

[backagain]

For all those virgins out there, stay true to yourself.

In short, I was 21 when I lost mine, and sometimes, still wish I had it.

It opens more doors than needs to be experienced before your ready, with

your spouce.

It may be hard with your virginity, but it is harder without it.

God Bless you all.

 

[Hope_0004]

Well, maybe this three months will put things in perspective. Just be patient with him... he is probably feeling inadequate.

 

[JeremiahJ]

I don't know if anyone mentioned this or not, pardon me for being redundant if you have. It's also possible that your boyfriend feels a certain amount of jealousy because you are not a virgin. He might feel jealousy toward you because you have experienced what he has not. More likely, he may feel envious of the guy(s) you have had sex with in the past. There may be a sense of injustice there. It can be unsettling that one's girlfriend has had deeper physical experiences with other guys than she has had with him. It might be frustrating that he can never have what you have already given away. So, he wants to even it up. He wants to create a just situation by himself participating in sexually iniquitous behavior. In becoming a virgin, you guys have the same amount to offer to eachother, it's a situation of equality. That sort of logic seems sensible, but it's twisted. Still, he may feel this way or be thinking this way, but be unable to change the way he feels or thinks. It's possible that he's trying to change this way of thinking, and knows it's not right, but can't get over the injustice he feels. If this is how he's thinking, then he's probably hesitant to tell you because it is kind of an embarassing, confusing, and perturbing thought process.

This is a mere hypothesis, I'm just throwing another idea out there. I've seen something similar to this before.

 

[JosephD3000]

I don't know if anyone mentioned this or not, pardon me for being redundant if you have. It's also possible that your boyfriend feels a certain amount of jealousy because you are not a virgin. He might feel jealousy toward you because you have experienced what he has not. More likely, he may feel envious of the guy(s) you have had sex with in the past. There may be a sense of injustice there. It can be unsettling that one's girlfriend has had deeper physical experiences with other guys than she has had with him. It might be frustrating that he can never have what you have already given away. So, he wants to even it up. He wants to create a just situation by himself participating in sexually iniquitous behavior. In becoming a virgin, you guys have the same amount to offer to eachother, it's a situation of equality. That sort of logic seems sensible, but it's twisted. Still, he may feel this way or be thinking this way, but be unable to change the way he feels or thinks. It's possible that he's trying to change this way of thinking, and knows it's not right, but can't get over the injustice he feels. If this is how he's thinking, then he's probably hesitant to tell you because it is kind of an embarassing, confusing, and perturbing thought process.

This is a mere hypothesis, I'm just throwing another idea out there. I've seen something similar to this before.

oooo good one, i think thats, though i dont who he is
it's more likely than not.

im a virgin and like the idea of not having premarital sex,

go virgins!!!!