Hello to you all,
I am a 19 year old that has recently been having great internal struggles about the quality of my faith in God, and walking the Christian walk. I, as many people were, was raised in a Christian home. My dad became a Christian in his 20's or 30's, and I believe that my mom knows the Lord well. Recently, however, I have been thinking about my own faith.
I feel like I've gone through my life so far "confident" that I am a Christian, having gone through the walks of being raised in a Christian household, but then I look hard into myself. I have had many sleepless nights recently that have ended with me being in tears (and I consider myself a "tough guy") and distraught, thinking "what if it (the Bible) isn't true? What if we are born of dust and wither away?".
In a fallen world among fallen people, there are those that deny the Lord, deny the existence of God, and praise instead their own ideas of both the origin of humanity and its destiny/meaning. When I was little, I found it much easier to accept the Bible and all accounts in it, but now that I am older, I find myself thinking of miracles and extraordinary happenings in the Bible, thinking "oh come on, could that really have happened?".
I have heard that many Christians have periods of doubt in their lives. I believe that this is that time. I think of my family and my dog, people and an animal that I have loved tremendously throughout the years, and have horrifying thoughts of all of that disappearing into time. As Christians, we are commanded to love the Lord with all thy heart. What prompted me to write this message was a verse that I read on another discussion page that someone posted (I forget the context of their post), Matthew 10:37:
"Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me;"
Reading this verse disturbed me greatly. My father and mother, my sister, even my dog - these people (and animal) I love so much. They are people I've loved as well as shown me love and nurtured me. Part of my struggle is finding that same love for the Lord. I (want to) believe that God sent Jesus to bridge the gap between Himself and humanity, and to be offered up as a sacrifice for our sins, but I find it difficult to love Him more than my own earthly family.
In essence, I'm at a hazy void in my life where I feel like I don't even really know myself. I wish I could go back to the time when Jesus walked the earth, more than anything. I'm trying to solidify my faith - not as what I'm brought up to believe, but what I CHOOSE to believe. Please pray for me.
Thank you for hearing me out. I wasn't sure if this was the right place to post this, but this has been a huge burden on me recently.
I am a 19 year old that has recently been having great internal struggles about the quality of my faith in God, and walking the Christian walk. I, as many people were, was raised in a Christian home. My dad became a Christian in his 20's or 30's, and I believe that my mom knows the Lord well. Recently, however, I have been thinking about my own faith.
I feel like I've gone through my life so far "confident" that I am a Christian, having gone through the walks of being raised in a Christian household, but then I look hard into myself. I have had many sleepless nights recently that have ended with me being in tears (and I consider myself a "tough guy") and distraught, thinking "what if it (the Bible) isn't true? What if we are born of dust and wither away?".
In a fallen world among fallen people, there are those that deny the Lord, deny the existence of God, and praise instead their own ideas of both the origin of humanity and its destiny/meaning. When I was little, I found it much easier to accept the Bible and all accounts in it, but now that I am older, I find myself thinking of miracles and extraordinary happenings in the Bible, thinking "oh come on, could that really have happened?".
I have heard that many Christians have periods of doubt in their lives. I believe that this is that time. I think of my family and my dog, people and an animal that I have loved tremendously throughout the years, and have horrifying thoughts of all of that disappearing into time. As Christians, we are commanded to love the Lord with all thy heart. What prompted me to write this message was a verse that I read on another discussion page that someone posted (I forget the context of their post), Matthew 10:37:
"Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me;"
Reading this verse disturbed me greatly. My father and mother, my sister, even my dog - these people (and animal) I love so much. They are people I've loved as well as shown me love and nurtured me. Part of my struggle is finding that same love for the Lord. I (want to) believe that God sent Jesus to bridge the gap between Himself and humanity, and to be offered up as a sacrifice for our sins, but I find it difficult to love Him more than my own earthly family.
In essence, I'm at a hazy void in my life where I feel like I don't even really know myself. I wish I could go back to the time when Jesus walked the earth, more than anything. I'm trying to solidify my faith - not as what I'm brought up to believe, but what I CHOOSE to believe. Please pray for me.
Thank you for hearing me out. I wasn't sure if this was the right place to post this, but this has been a huge burden on me recently.
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