To Delete Or Not To Delete?

[exitstageright]

To Delete Or Not To Delete?,that is the question.
I have 9 women's telephone numbers in my cell phone's contact list.All but one has gone out on me for a first date,but not a second date. They tell me that they are busy. Well,I am busy also,yet I occassional call them to try to set something up.

All of them are not attached.Only married women and women with boyfriends are very friendly towards me.

So,should I just delete their numbers and give up? I have had enough of their lame excuses why they cannot see me on their days off. I am willing to make time to see them between my very busy schedule.
If a woman wants something or someone bad enough,she would make an effort to get what she wants. I am fed up with all of this assinine nonsense! If they really wanted to see me,they would call me!
Maybe GOD gave me a self-sufficient personality,because I feel that I really do not need anyone to be contented in my life.
Right now,I can really indentify with this popular song by Simon and Garfunkel.:

A winter's day
In a deep and dark December;
I am alone,
Gazing from my window to the streets below
On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

I've built walls,
A fortress deep and mighty,
That none may penetrate.
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

Don't talk of love,
But I've heard the words before;
It's sleeping in my memory.
I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.
If I never loved I never would have cried.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

I have my books (Hobbies)
And my poetry(songs) to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

And a rock feels no pain;
And an island never cries.

 

[blackribbon]

How about you keep the numbers for a year but don't call anymore? That way their name will still pop up if they do happen to find time and are interested.

I seldom cut people completely out of my life...but that doesn't mean I invest very much time in friendships that are completely one sided.

However, if the numbers taunt you...then delete them.

 

[blackribbon]

To Delete Or Not To Delete?,that is the question.

If a woman wants something or someone bad enough,she would make an effort to get what she wants.

This is a true statement. You have found the answer for these particular women.

 

[exitstageright]

How about you keep the numbers for a year but don't call anymore? That way their name will still pop up if they do happen to find time and are interested.

I seldom cut people completely out of my life...but that doesn't mean I invest very much time in friendships that are completely one sided.

However, if the numbers taunt you...then delete them.

Keeping them for a year before deleting them? That sounds like a good idea. After a year,while deleting the numbers ,I will just play that Michael Jackson song, "She's Out of My Life"

 

[exitstageright]

This is a true statement. You have found the answer for these particular women.

Why...oh why...did I not learn this 40 years ago?

 

[renewed21]

move on brother. It's not healthy. Deletion is in order here. They aren't into you. Stiff upper lip sir.

 

[blackribbon]

Keeping them for a year before deleting them? That sounds like a good idea. After a year,while deleting the numbers ,I will just play that Michael Jackson song, "She's Out of My Life"

Nope, the hard honest truth was she never was in your life. One date does not make a relationship. At that point, you should be looking at the name and wondering "who the heck is this?", as in, you really don't remember because you haven't wasted one more moment rehashing it.

 

[exitstageright]

Nope, the hard honest truth was she never was in your life. One date does not make a relationship. At that point, you should be looking at the name and wondering "who the heck is this?", as in, you really don't remember because you haven't wasted one more moment rehashing it.

Well....the sad fact is that only married and attached women care about being with me.Yes,I do admit that it was wrong,in 1992,before I was ever married,to have an affair with a married co-worker. She kept comming on to me,while rubbing her hands on my hands.Why did not any single women ever pay attention to me? Yes,I was desperate. I justified the affair,because it was better than being with a hooker,or going to a massage parlour,in order for me to be touched by a woman.

Just today,a co-worker,who has been working for the company for only two months,told me indirectly,that she has a boyfriend. Yet,from day one,she has been very friendly towards me,always waving at me,tells me that my tennis shoes are cute,and she says that I make her laugh.She obviously enjoys talking to me on lunch breaks. We even had coffee together after work.She just wanted to vent. I just listened mostly. Other single women at my work place have boyfriends,and they are very friendly to me. Even my gay male co-worker is always glad to see me.!
I just cannot understand why married and attached women always treat me better than single and unattached women treat me. I never murdered anyone. My initials are SW, not........O.J.

 

[blackribbon]

Happy women are usually friendly people...and maybe feel safe to be more open with you because they know that you know that they are not available. It sounds like you are likeable...so I can't say why you aren't noticed by the available ladies. Maybe it is time to get one of those non-available but friendly people (gay guy included) to help you figure this out.

(I won't even begin to pretend I understand the married woman who came onto you.)

 

[exitstageright]

Happy women are usually friendly people...and maybe feel safe to be more open with you because they know that you know that they are not available. It sounds like you are likeable...so I can't say why you aren't noticed by the available ladies. Maybe it is time to get one of those non-available but friendly people (gay guy included) to help you figure this out.

(I won't even begin to pretend I understand the married woman who came onto you.)

I will ask them. Some women,who are attached,do ask me why hasn't anyone "snatched me up". All I could say is that we do not live in an ideal,and a logical world. I see homeless men on the street and some of them have a woman. If,GOD forbid that should happen to me,I know that I would not have any woman by my side.Who would want me? I am not wanted now,yet I am living the "American Dream".
Yes,there are more important things in life than money. But....for me..
money is the "consolation prize" I will just have to learn to live with myself,by myself,and for myself. I will just have to spend my money on myself,by myself,and for myself. I tried,I really tried to live right,to find a wife,as it says in the book of Proverbs. If those good christain women,who rejected me,are not a part of the solution,they must be part of the problem.

 

[renewed21]

perhaps you might ask such women their thoughts on why it is they have decided not to persue a relationship with you. Sounds logical to me. A direct answer straight from the horses mouth, so to speak.

 

[exitstageright]

perhaps you might ask such women their thoughts on why it is they have decided not to persue a relationship with you. Sounds logical to me. A direct answer straight from the horses mouth, so to speak.

Maybe you have got something there. I have not deleted all of those numbers yet.They all have voice mails. I will just ask them without sounding whiney,sad,or desperate.
I try to do the right thing, ( by seeking a long term monogamous realtionship with an intelligent, and caring woman),but I get no help.It seems, that the only women who want to touch me,are hookers and women who work in massage parlours.

How does this sound?
"Hello.... This is S...... I would like to know your thoughts on why you have decided not to persue a relationship with me? I hear women say,all of the time that they want to be persued. Well,.....I am persuing,but I am getting no positive results."

 

[blackribbon]

Maybe you have got something there. I have not deleted all of those numbers yet.They all have voice mails. I will just ask them without sounding whiney,sad,or desperate.
I try to do the right thing, ( by seeking a long term monogamous realtionship with an intelligent, and caring woman),but I get no help.It seems, that the only women who want to touch me,are hookers and women who work in massage parlours.

How does this sound?
"Hello.... This is S...... I would like to know your thoughts on why you have decided not to persue a relationship with me? I hear women say,all of the time that they want to be persued. Well,.....I am persuing,but I am getting no positive results."

You won't get an answer and you probably will get a reputation for being strange or desperate. These women have already shown that they are not direct answer type of people. In their minds, they think they are being kind by not hurting your feelings. Obviously, it hurts more NOT getting a direct answer and at least understanding what is going on. I'd ask the friend that seem the most frank and direct ... even to the point that it often shocks other people ... because this person doesn't filter everything that comes out of her/his mouth. When they tell you, don't argue with them ... just absorb what they are saying and go from there. (This is only their opinion...and no amount of arguing with this person will change the opinion of the women who are available.)

 

[exitstageright]

You won't get an answer and you probably will get a reputation for being strange or desperate. These women have already shown that they are not direct answer type of people. In their minds, they think they are being kind by not hurting your feelings. Obviously, it hurts more NOT getting a direct answer and at least understanding what is going on. I'd ask the friend that seem the most frank and direct ... even to the point that it often shocks other people ... because this person doesn't filter everything that comes out of her/his mouth. When they tell you, don't argue with them ... just absorb what they are saying and go from there. (This is only their opinion...and no amount of arguing with this person will change the opinion of the women who are available.)

Since you are a woman,and you know how women think,I will not ask them.
At the risk of sounding existential, I sometimes think that GOD does not care about us men who need a woman. We try,we try,and we try to "play by the rules",to keep his commandments,and to find a wife to keep from commiting fornication. Yet,he does not help us to find a wife. He does not give us (some men) the gift of what to say to a woman what she wants to hear,in order for that woman to romantically want us.

I take solace in the fact, in John 3:16: it does not say that GOD sent his SON into the world so that every man can find a wife.
After all,CHRIST coming into the world to save us,is.......the bottom line.

 

[blackribbon]

How do you know that God didn't put the perfect woman in your life...but you disregarded her because you didn't like the packaging or something else about her?

I went without any friends at one point in my life for a couple years. It hurt because I couldn't figure out why nobody wanted to hang around me and I had always had a number of close friends. I was forced to lean on God and deepen my relationship with Him during those years. I hit a point where I finally just was at peace with my hubby being my only friend and suddenly I had more friends in my life than I could manage.

Sometimes the dry spells in our life are times when God wants to refine us. You can either accept it and seek what you are to learn...or you can fight it and determine that God is a big meanie who doesn't have your best interest in mind.

I hear your pain and understand how lonely you feel. However, it is better learn to accept your current condition and make the best of it than fight God because He isn't giving you what you think you want.

Unanswered Prayers (Garth Brooks song)

Just the other night a hometown football game
My wife and I ran into my old high school flame
And as I introduced them the past came back to me
And I couldn't help but think of the way things used to be

She was the one that I'd wanted for all times
And each night I'd spend prayin' that God would make her mine
And if he'd only grant me this wish I wished back then
I'd never ask for anything again

Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers
Remember when you're talkin' to the man upstairs
That just because he doesn't answer doesn't mean he don't care
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers

She wasn't quite the angel that I remembered in my dreams
And I could tell that time had changed me
In her eyes too it seemed
We tried to talk about the old days
There wasn't much we could recall
I guess the Lord knows what he's doin' after all

And as she walked away and I looked at my wife
And then and there I thanked the good Lord
For the gifts in my life

Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers

Remember when you're talkin' to the man upstairs
That just because he may not answer doesn't mean he don't care
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered

Some of God's greatest gifts are all too often unanswered...
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers

 

[exitstageright]

How do you know that God didn't put the perfect woman in your life...but you disregarded her because you didn't like the packaging or something else about her?

I went without any friends at one point in my life for a couple years. It hurt because I couldn't figure out why nobody wanted to hang around me and I had always had a number of close friends. I was forced to lean on God and deepen my relationship with Him during those years. I hit a point where I finally just was at peace with my hubby being my only friend and suddenly I had more friends in my life than I could manage.

Sometimes the dry spells in our life are times when God wants to refine us. You can either accept it and seek what you are to learn...or you can fight it and determine that God is a big meanie who doesn't have your best interest in mind.

I hear your pain and understand how lonely you feel. However, it is better learn to accept your current condition and make the best of it than fight God because He isn't giving you what you think you want.

Unanswered Prayers (Garth Brooks song)

Just the other night a hometown football game
My wife and I ran into my old high school flame
And as I introduced them the past came back to me
And I couldn't help but think of the way things used to be

She was the one that I'd wanted for all times
And each night I'd spend prayin' that God would make her mine
And if he'd only grant me this wish I wished back then
I'd never ask for anything again

Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers
Remember when you're talkin' to the man upstairs
That just because he doesn't answer doesn't mean he don't care
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers

She wasn't quite the angel that I remembered in my dreams
And I could tell that time had changed me
In her eyes too it seemed
We tried to talk about the old days
There wasn't much we could recall
I guess the Lord knows what he's doin' after all

And as she walked away and I looked at my wife
And then and there I thanked the good Lord
For the gifts in my life

Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers

Remember when you're talkin' to the man upstairs
That just because he may not answer doesn't mean he don't care
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered

Some of God's greatest gifts are all too often unanswered...
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers

Thanks for the song. I like Garth Brooks. I just get tired of always being shoved into....."the friend zone". It seems that the only women, who do want me,feel as if it is their "calling" to emotionally torment me.

 

[Life2Christ]

Everytime I feel sorry for myself about being single and lonely I think back to all the times that I acted like a jerk in my relationships. I really wasnt an angel at times. But God is refining me in the fire of my lonliness. Could this be your situation as well?

Also find another way to say "friend zone". It makes you sound like a victim and you are not that.

 

[exitstageright]

Everytime I feel sorry for myself about being single and lonely I think back to all the times that I acted like a jerk in my relationships. I really wasnt an angel at times. But God is refining me in the fire of my lonliness. Could this be your situation as well?

Also find another way to say "friend zone". It makes you sound like a victim and you are not that.

You do not like the words"Friend Zone"?

Well how about?

1. Good,but not good enough

2. second place

3. She sees me as a brother but not as a lover.

4.A key without a lock

5. A king without a queen

6. An Adam without an Eve

7. Bumped and dumped

I am open for suggestions.At least I can have some fun with something.

 

[blackribbon]

Thanks for the song. I like Garth Brooks. I just get tired of always being shoved into....."the friend zone". It seems that the only women, who do want me,feel as if it is their "calling" to emotionally torment me.

I wish I knew you better so I could give you some positive feedback ... but I do not doubt that you are lonely and frustrated. Maybe you might want to go to a good Christian bookstore and look for a relationship book. For you I might try to find one written by a man since I think that you connect better with a man's viewpoint (so the logic makes more sense.)

Exit, you do deserve to be loved...not conditionally like your ex-wives did, but loved even on your very worst days. We all do. Unfortunately, life doesn't always give us what we deserve...but in the same breath, thankfully, life doesn't always give us what we deserve (which is damnation).

 

[Life2Christ]

You do not like the words"Friend Zone"?


I am open for suggestions.At least I can have some fun with something.

1.The penalty box

2. Dante's Ninth Circle of Hell

3. The black hole