- Oct 1, 2006
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The next few months are going to be a difficult time for me to get through. Christmas is coming up, and I'm not looking forward to spending it without Brian. Around the end of December of last year, Brian started having what we thought were migraines. On January 11, 2006 he was diagnosed with a Glioblastoma class IV brain tumor, and 3.5 months later, he passed away on April 28, 2006.
The memories of all of this are still very real in my mind, and the feelings and emotions are welling up inside and I'm finding it hard to cope. I know God will use this time to strengthen me even more, and give me greater courage, knowledge and wisdom. I welcome these blessings very much. I also know, and look forward to the day when He will turn all of this around, and use these circumstances for His glory, and the edification of the church. He is true and faithful, and I know He is always with me especially in times of trouble.
Our 5th anniversary just passed on Nov. 10. I got through that O.K. It just seemed like another day to me, so I guess that's a blessing it went that way. I've had to have a lot of stuff taken to the dump that Brian gathered for renovations on the house. This saddened me a great deal, and only reminded me of the plans we had together as husband and wife, and his plans for the renovations on the house that he was unable to complete.
I do recognize the feelings and emotions I am going through, and understand how to deal with the process of mourning, grieving and then healing properly, and I know I need to allow myself enough time to work through each milestone as it comes.
I can see God's plan for my life unfolding. He has given me new desires in my heart, of which I feel He would have me do for Him sometime in the near future, but for now, I'll rest in Him and continue to allow Him to strengthen me and give me courage for the next few months, and always. In God's time, He will show me my destiny and the steps of His plan for my life and what He would have me do for Him.
I live on my own now, no children at home anymore, so it gets pretty sad and lonely for me. I guess what I need is some encouragement and a shoulder to cry on to get through these next few months. That's why I decided to post this, cause I know you all understand, and are compassionate people, and give a lot of really good encouragement when it's needed. Thank you.
The memories of all of this are still very real in my mind, and the feelings and emotions are welling up inside and I'm finding it hard to cope. I know God will use this time to strengthen me even more, and give me greater courage, knowledge and wisdom. I welcome these blessings very much. I also know, and look forward to the day when He will turn all of this around, and use these circumstances for His glory, and the edification of the church. He is true and faithful, and I know He is always with me especially in times of trouble.
Our 5th anniversary just passed on Nov. 10. I got through that O.K. It just seemed like another day to me, so I guess that's a blessing it went that way. I've had to have a lot of stuff taken to the dump that Brian gathered for renovations on the house. This saddened me a great deal, and only reminded me of the plans we had together as husband and wife, and his plans for the renovations on the house that he was unable to complete.
I do recognize the feelings and emotions I am going through, and understand how to deal with the process of mourning, grieving and then healing properly, and I know I need to allow myself enough time to work through each milestone as it comes.
I can see God's plan for my life unfolding. He has given me new desires in my heart, of which I feel He would have me do for Him sometime in the near future, but for now, I'll rest in Him and continue to allow Him to strengthen me and give me courage for the next few months, and always. In God's time, He will show me my destiny and the steps of His plan for my life and what He would have me do for Him.
I live on my own now, no children at home anymore, so it gets pretty sad and lonely for me. I guess what I need is some encouragement and a shoulder to cry on to get through these next few months. That's why I decided to post this, cause I know you all understand, and are compassionate people, and give a lot of really good encouragement when it's needed. Thank you.
I am praying that God hold you in his arms through this difficult time. The first few years are hard. (The first 20 years have been hard for me) But God will get you through it. Just have faith and lean on him when you get sad and lonely. He will always be there for you. 
