If you take the time to read this, then may God Bless you. Forgive me, but I do not wish to mention (or remember) the incident I am talking about. What I was feeling is the true importance...
Two years ago, I did something. I did something very bad. Something that should never be forgiven.
I saw something very bad one ordinary night, and I was imagining it in my head over and over again after I saw what I had seen. I don't know why, but I did. I knew in my heart it was bad, but I continued anyway.
So, I kept on doing it. Doing it and doing it again and again. Until finally, I was caught. But, to some extent, I thank God that I was caught.
Who knows what could have occured if I had kept doing it.
I would have thrown away my entire future, never being able to return to what I was originally, according to my parents, a "good, intelligent little boy, who always respected what he was told."
For five months, I was living in constant anxiety, fear, and stress that something should happen to me. And for five months, I prayed non-stop. I constantly asked God to take away the burden that was hovering over my head, the fears that had consumed my mind. I told Him multiple times that I was truly sorry for what I had done, the sin that had tained my mind and soul.
I begged Him for His Mercy to be laid upon, and that even a little bit of His Mercy was too much for me. But I asked anyway, every day.
I was so nervous, that I had actually developed dandruff. Dandruff can occur due to extreme emotional distress, which I was under constantly. I had also lost 46 lbs, both due to exercising, and the constant depression, fear, and anxieties.
I got straight As, I was exercising every day, and I prayed every night, hoping that my mistake had not ruined my entire life.
I believe now that the incident is over now. But...I feel as though my mistake is not completely gone.
I feel like there's still a lesson that needs to be learned from my horrible and evil mistake, that was lead to me by the devil. I fear, that although I feel like I'm now on calm waters, God might still be planning an even more-still severe punishment for my wicked and devious sin.
Remember, the last person you ever want to get angry, is the LORD Himself. And God, all I ask is that you give me Peace from this sin, and let me live my life happily. Have Mercy on Me, Jesus Christ.
Please, Lord, I beg of You, let me live the way I imagined my life when I was a small boy: happily, successful, a good person, and with a beautiful family. I promise to never do this sin again, and I will try my hardest to obery your Ten Commandments.
Thank you so much for reading what I was feeling. And please, if you can find in your heart, please make a small prayer for me, a seventeen-year-old sinner who has already committed enough sins for one lifetime. Thank you, and may the Son of God Bless you.
Two years ago, I did something. I did something very bad. Something that should never be forgiven.
I saw something very bad one ordinary night, and I was imagining it in my head over and over again after I saw what I had seen. I don't know why, but I did. I knew in my heart it was bad, but I continued anyway.
So, I kept on doing it. Doing it and doing it again and again. Until finally, I was caught. But, to some extent, I thank God that I was caught.
Who knows what could have occured if I had kept doing it.
I would have thrown away my entire future, never being able to return to what I was originally, according to my parents, a "good, intelligent little boy, who always respected what he was told."
For five months, I was living in constant anxiety, fear, and stress that something should happen to me. And for five months, I prayed non-stop. I constantly asked God to take away the burden that was hovering over my head, the fears that had consumed my mind. I told Him multiple times that I was truly sorry for what I had done, the sin that had tained my mind and soul.
I begged Him for His Mercy to be laid upon, and that even a little bit of His Mercy was too much for me. But I asked anyway, every day.
I was so nervous, that I had actually developed dandruff. Dandruff can occur due to extreme emotional distress, which I was under constantly. I had also lost 46 lbs, both due to exercising, and the constant depression, fear, and anxieties.
I got straight As, I was exercising every day, and I prayed every night, hoping that my mistake had not ruined my entire life.
I believe now that the incident is over now. But...I feel as though my mistake is not completely gone.
I feel like there's still a lesson that needs to be learned from my horrible and evil mistake, that was lead to me by the devil. I fear, that although I feel like I'm now on calm waters, God might still be planning an even more-still severe punishment for my wicked and devious sin.
Remember, the last person you ever want to get angry, is the LORD Himself. And God, all I ask is that you give me Peace from this sin, and let me live my life happily. Have Mercy on Me, Jesus Christ.
Please, Lord, I beg of You, let me live the way I imagined my life when I was a small boy: happily, successful, a good person, and with a beautiful family. I promise to never do this sin again, and I will try my hardest to obery your Ten Commandments.
Thank you so much for reading what I was feeling. And please, if you can find in your heart, please make a small prayer for me, a seventeen-year-old sinner who has already committed enough sins for one lifetime. Thank you, and may the Son of God Bless you.