The Argument for Divorce

[JuniperSomething]

Hello!

So I’ve been debating with myself over the idea of divorce and remarriage. I was wondering if anyone had any compelling Biblical arguments in the favour of divorce/remarriage

 

[Tree of Life]

There are two biblically defensible positions:

1. Divorce is never permissible (not my view).
2. Divorce is permissible under certain circumstances - namely infidelity or abandonment. (my view).

I hope we have the Christian charity in this thread to recognize that faithful, Bible believing people can have some disagreements on this issue.

 

[Yeshua HaDerekh]

Yeshua said that divorce was not at the beginning but was allowed later because of hard hearts. Sexual immorality is the only reason... Matthew 19

 

[GospelS]

I think bible is pretty clear on this whole issue with various scenarios. Arguments can only be discussed based on the situation because all marriages are different with different issues.

 

[bèlla]

There are definite situations that would warrant a separation of varying lengths. Abuse, infidelity, criminal activity, financial recklessness and addictions may require time apart.

I’m unable to think beyond that point. It’s possible the Lord may heal the issue and restore the marriage. I don’t want to get ahead of Him.

 

[NothingIsImpossible]

I think the bible makes it crystal clear. Its never permissible. It even says God hates divorce. Most use the adultery thing as grounds for divorce but I tend to say if you cherry-pick a verse, then yes, it sounds like its permissible. But if you read chapters in whole you will see the point of it was a lesson for us. To see that no matter what God says, people will always come up with a reason to do what they want when they have their heart set on it.

Like a teenager set on rebelling, sometimes you can't do anything to stop them and they have to learn the hard way. Thus the bible adds that anyone who divorces cannot remarry as in Gods eyes they are still married and they must live their life single until their spouse passes away or unless the remarry the person again. I'd add that the fact that even exists in the bible should be evidence that divorce is not allowed.

I'd say I am not saying you have to stay in with the person if they are abusive for example. You can choose to move out and stay married still.

Now the problem is people say "What if I move out and they divorce me? I am stuck being single because of their choice? That's not fair!".

Well it is not fair indeed. But God never said life would be fair. Especially as a christian. We sacrifice alot. And in the case of divorce we sacrifice ever being able to marry again. Unless of course are spouse passes away.

Remember our purpose is to spread the Word. To be light in the world. Marriage is not our purpose. It's just a thing we can do if we want to. People need to stop acting as if the world is terrible if they can't remarry. Our lives are short on this planet and for lack of better words, not important. After we die is the important part. If one is upset over not being able to remarry then it's obvious they made an idol out of love/marriage and are ignoring the most important love. God's.

Things come and go, but His love is forever.

 

[Lost4words]

The Bible says one thing but 'reality' says another.

 

[ProdigalGander]

There are two biblically defensible positions:

1. Divorce is never permissible (not my view).
2. Divorce is permissible under certain circumstances - namely infidelity or abandonment. (my view).

I belong to a church that believes #1.
My wife committed #2 - infidelity and abandonment.
That sort of leaves me out on an island.

I always thought divorce was wrong and never believed I would ever get one. But the reality was that there was absolutely nothing I could have done to prevent my wife from doing what she did. I have just had to learn to accept it.

My wife had suffered from some disturbing mental health issues. To me they had manifested only in the last few years of our marriage. But since she's gone my adult daughters opened up and shared with me the fact that their mother had some disturbing psych episodes while they were young children and I was away at work. In one instance she grabbed a pot of hot chili off the stove and threw it at my daughter. In another she threw a hammer. But she would always click into June Cleaver mode by the time I got home from work, and my kids opted not to tell me anything of this until recently.

You always think that staying together is the best thing for your kids, but now I actually feel guilty about that. There were apparently instances where I was putting young children in danger by leaving them at home alone with her.

 

[SkyWriting]

Hello!

So I’ve been debating with myself over the idea of divorce and remarriage. I was wondering if anyone had any compelling Biblical arguments in the favour of divorce/remarriage

Nothing in favor of remarriage. (Not that I'm complaining Dear. )

 

[bling]

Divorce for even the wrong reasons does happen, since Jesus calls it divorce and remarriage can happen for even the wrong way, but Jesus called it a marriage. So if a couple divorces and remarries they have divorced and remarried, so have spousal responsibility to their new mate.

 

[SkyWriting]

I belong to a church that believes #1.
My wife committed #2 - infidelity and abandonment.
That sort of leaves me out on an island.

I always thought divorce was wrong and never believed I would ever get one. But the reality was that there was absolutely nothing I could have done to prevent my wife from doing what she did. I have just had to learn to accept it.

My wife had suffered from some disturbing mental health issues. To me they had manifested only in the last few years of our marriage. But since she's gone my adult daughters opened up and shared with me the fact that their mother had some disturbing psych episodes while they were young children and I was away at work. In one instance she grabbed a pot of hot chili off the stove and threw it at my daughter. In another she threw a hammer. But she would always click into June Cleaver mode by the time I got home from work, and my kids opted not to tell me anything of this until recently.

You always think that staying together is the best thing for your kids, but now I actually feel guilty about that. There were apparently instances where I was putting young children in danger by leaving them at home alone with her.

It's always good to intentionally be open to hear what ones kids are hesitant to tell you. I've worked at being a good listener. And you can start that any time with no regrets....unless you don't do it.

 

[ProdigalGander]

It's always good to intentionally be open to hear what ones kids are hesitant to tell you. I've worked at being a good listener. And you can start that any time with no regrets....unless you don't do it.

The flipside of that situation was that her father had mental issues which were much more obvious than hers. Had we split while the kids were little she likely would have taken them to live with her parents, and given his track record, even worse things might have happened.

 

[SkyWriting]

The flipside of that situation was that her father had mental issues which were much more obvious than hers. Had we split while the kids were little she likely would have taken them to live with her parents, and given his track record, even worse things might have happened.

No regrets is the best way to go.
Because that's how it went.