Suitable age difference

kiora · Nov 15, 2006

There is no suitable age difference it depends. Personally myself I wouldn't go out with anyone past 30 but that is just a personal thing and I wouldn't go out with anyone younger than me. My fiance is 23 and that is nice but I would of considered going out with someone older than that

Niels · Nov 19, 2006

It's hard to make generalizations about this topic. The most reasonable age difference seems to be when the man is no more than 5 years older than the woman. Well, that's my comfort zone. A lot really depends on the people involved.

But who knows... maybe I'll end up marrying a woman who is more than 5 years younger than me. I'm still saving sex for marriage, and I have very little in common with 26-31 year old divorced parents.

1Cor13v13 · Nov 23, 2006

I have to say, if you're in Gods Will, He will determine the person, what ever the age.

princessellie · Nov 23, 2006

i find that any age difference more than say 2-3 years can be a bit of a problem, you are wanting different things out of life, but thats definately a personal opinion though experience

-Kyriaki- · Nov 23, 2006

Anywhere up to 10 years I think...but I mean it's different for everyone.

And on this topic - someone on the first page said about if you're an adult you should never ever date a minor? My boyfriend was 19 when he met me - at 15, asked my dad's permission and we've been together ever since. He's treated me like a princess (and with complete respect) for all that time, despite people making all sorts of comments about it when we were younger. Adult/minor relationships aren't necessarily a bad thing, they can be but I wouldn't make that generalisation. Just because someone's an adult (over 18) doesn't mean that it makes an incredible difference.

superfly · Nov 25, 2006

my fiance is 8 years younger than me. sure, some people have made comments (including my mom), but i largely ignore them. i know that the people are just concerned about me, and i appreciate that.

we know that God has put us together. we've prayed about it, others have prayed about it, and we have just seen God's hand at work in our lives and in our relationship. she's very mature, both mentally and spiritually, and she's like my perfect match personality wise.

my advice? don't worry about it, give it to God.

OceanGirl · Nov 26, 2006

See, that is how I feel. I am 10 years younger than my SO, but we both feel God has put us together for a reason, despite our obvious age difference. I have never gotten along as well with people my own age as I have with people either older or younger than me. So, I feel that it is more comfortable than me to date a 31 year old with a good job that he is invaluable in and cares about me as a person than to date a drunken 21 year old frat boy who only cares about my body and partying until he falls over. But that's just me. My boyfriend/significant other is a very strong Christian and an overall good person. Not to mention he treats me with utter respect and love. I don't see where age should make such a radical concern unless it's illegal or something (i.e. minors dating adults). I say pray about it. We both have prayed about our relationship and in both of our cases, we feel that the help we have provided each other is Godsent. It has to be.

candace1111 · Nov 27, 2006

I also wouldnt dated a guy who was over 30 if I was 21.
I think that it all depends on the mentality of the person and yourself, how mature you both are, and what your plans at the momment are.

CaliforniaJosiah · Nov 27, 2006

TLB said:
What do you think is a suitable age difference assuming that the guy is older then the girl and that the girl is 21 or older.

Of course, this isn't a "fixed" thing and it's more a maturity issue than a biological age one - but we need to be HONEST about this. Almost everyone THINKS they are more mature than they really are...

It's about being PEERS - being in the same "place." I'd totally wonder about a 25 year old man who is in the "same place" as a 17 year high school old girl - something is very WRONG with that guy!!!!

OceanGirl · Nov 29, 2006

candace1111 said:
I also wouldnt dated a guy who was over 30 if I was 21.
I think that it all depends on the mentality of the person and yourself, how mature you both are, and what your plans at the momment are.

I am very mature for my age. I see people my own age as grown up high schoolers and that makes me cringe. My boyfriend and I are pretty much on the same level. We laugh together, talk together and work together. All is well in our little world. I am not your typical 21 year old and he is not your typical 31 year old. So, I believe taking a look at the other person beyond their age is crucial.

Tegger · Nov 29, 2006

I've always wanted to see pics of the couples on here with the 8 yrs+ age gaps....

livin4thelord8 · Nov 30, 2006

My SO and I have 21 years age difference. I'm 23 and he's 44. When he first mentioned us taking our relationship further over a year ago I was like, "yeah right!" But I prayed about it...didn't want to miss something from God. God ended up bringing us together and we are very very happy. Even in my young age, we have had very very similar things happen in our lives (married young, had children young, made mistakes, came to know Christ, got divorced) and are on the same wavelength spiritually. I definately don't act 23...never had the chance to which I'm not upset about. With Christ by my side, I've survived horrible things and am now raising my boys to know Him, own a successful business (thanks to God) and he's been through many similar things as well. He doesn't act 44 either. We have tons of fun and laugh a lot. I think what's important is first that God brings you together, then you constantly seek Him, have good communication, similar likes/dislikes, goals, desires, dreams, standards, morals, etc. You trust God to put you with the right person and the rest will already be there. Our family hasn't said a whole lot about it. They joke about him being an old man more than anything. For the most part they just want us to be happy. After all, it's our lives, not theirs. When my scanner gets here, I'll post some pics of us on our recent trip to Kentucky. God bless!!!

Sothron · Dec 1, 2006

I don't think there is one quite frankly. Two people who are adult enough to understand the love that marriage entails and what it means have no age barrier in my eyes.

livin4thelord8 · Dec 1, 2006

I got to thinking last night, people we don't know haven't seemed shocked by us when we go places, either. Just last weekend he and I, my two boys (5 and 2) and his daughter (11) were in a store. The lady at the register asked his daughter how she liked having two younger brothers. She just smiled and said she likes it. Then the lady made a comment about me being his daughter's mom and we just smiled. Of course were joking about it later and still do...especially since I would have been 12 when I would have had her. lol I told her either I look really old or her dad looks really young. She thought that was pretty funny. I just thought about that and thought I'd share. lol God bless!!!

Silver-winged Flyer · Dec 7, 2006

livin4thelord8 said:
I got to thinking last night, people we don't know haven't seemed shocked by us when we go places, either. Just last weekend he and I, my two boys (5 and 2) and his daughter (11) were in a store. The lady at the register asked his daughter how she liked having two younger brothers. She just smiled and said she likes it. Then the lady made a comment about me being his daughter's mom and we just smiled. Of course were joking about it later and still do...especially since I would have been 12 when I would have had her. lol I told her either I look really old or her dad looks really young. She thought that was pretty funny. I just thought about that and thought I'd share. lol God bless!!!

Thank you for sharing. Its very encouraging for me to hear about your experience with your age difference being fairly big.

livin4thelord8 · Dec 11, 2006

TLB, do you and your SO have an age difference? Maybe you've already stated it on this thread...I just forgot. I'm going to try to download a pic. God bless!

whateveristrue · Dec 11, 2006

In my opinion, if the guy is older than her dad... that is not suitable!

Llauralin · Dec 12, 2006

PastorJer said:
I have my own little theory on this one... take your age divide by 2 and add 7...

You can do that until you are 40... at which point the age difference should NEVER exceed 13 years...

I think there must be a starting point for that one as well - by your calculations I could date a guy who was 17 - that would just be too weird

Llauralin · Dec 12, 2006

livin4thelord8 said:
TLB, do you and your SO have an age difference? Maybe you've already stated it on this thread...I just forgot. I'm going to try to download a pic. God bless!

That's such a cute picture!

livin4thelord8 · Dec 12, 2006

whateveristrue...well then we're safe. : )

Thnx Llauralin! He is such a sweetheart. I don't think I have ever met any guy with a sweeter spirit. He's one of those guys that makes you feel like you're up on a pedastal...and makes you want to make him feel the same. We had a really good pic of us in Kentucky but I haven't got my new scanner figured out yet. lol I'm so greatful to God for bringing us together. God bless you guys!

We hope the site problems here are now solved, however, if you still have any issues, please start a ticket in Contact Us

Suitable age difference

Senior Member

Woodshedding

Senior Veteran

Senior Member

seeking answers in stillness

Senior Member

Well-Known Member

Member

Well-Known Member

Well-Known Member

Newbie

Redeemed Through Christ

Humble Orthodox Christian

Redeemed Through Christ

I take the road less traveled

Redeemed Through Christ

Attachments

Regular Member

Senior Veteran

Senior Veteran

Redeemed Through Christ

Similar threads

Privacy & Transparency

Privacy & Transparency