stop life

[soyness]

I just want to stop life. I hate to sound this dramatic. I don't know why i want to covet something that everyone else have: something like a perfect life iwth perfect family, akways happy, pretty, girls or guys chasing after them, practical and perfect in every single way... list goes on. I know i am a Christian and I know i shouldn't feel like this. but i do all the time. Please pray for me. I have a lot going on for my life. but i just feel like it's not good enough. I'm messy, impractical and just foolish in some ways.

 

[ChildOfGod15]

I'll be praying for you.

I know exactly how you feel. I'm extremely self-conscience about the way I look and they way people treat me, and I've also been struggling with depression/suicidal thoughts, etc. Everything just seems so...horrible since I broke up with my boyfriend. I can't seem to find joy in a single thing I do or have. It really seems like killing myself would just make things better.....just dying and getting it all over with. Escaping from this living nightmare seems like the only way out sometimes.

I keep telling myself that if God wanted me to be in heaven, then he'd let me die. I also think about my family and friends. They freaked out SO much when one of my friends started cutting, what would they do if I just died...disappeared out of their lives? And my mom....she's told me before that she doesn't know what she'd do if I weren't around for her to talk to and laugh with.

You may not be as blessed with loved ones like I am, but even if you don't have that many people in your life that love you remember this: God loves you nomatter what you've done, what you look like, where you live, or who you know. He's there for you all the time, even when you have no guys chasing you.

If you start feeling unimportant or really down on yourself because you don't have a boyfriend or husband, just remember that you're still a good person, and you shouldn't need a guy to make you happy. I'm not saying you can't get lonely, that's completely understandable, but remember that you do still have things to look forward to. And just because you don't have a guy now doesn't mean you won't find one in the future....so what's he supposed to do if you give up on looking for him now?

God Bless
-Sarah