Step 1

[LoG]

Step 1. We admitted we were powerless over _________ and our lives had become unmanageable.

What we are powerless over was left blank because people are powerless over many different things that can make life unmanageable.

This thread is for sharing what we are powerless over and how that has caused turmoil in our lives, since it is through admitting defeat that we open our hearts and minds to another way of dealing with our powerlessness.

 

[justanobserver]

Step 1 was at the time the hardest step for me to get thru. When I was able to finally admit to myself that I was powerless over my drinking and using, I was able to work on living a clean and sober life.

 

[If Not For Grace]

I can beat this "little problem",

That's what I keep saying about smoking--others have why can't I?

I'm not sure if I have a Step One or Step Three problem-- cause I seem to fight both:


It costs a fortune, is nasty, creates social problems, Inconvenience is not even close, and it stands between me and God (body a temple etc.)

But the truth is I want God to make it easy for me--like a magic genie and He said No.

That's right God said NO!

I will not change the rules for you. Everybody else went through withdrawal, everybody else has triggers. Now make it as easy on yourself as you can, but you must suffer the consequences for your choices. He says I will help you, I will make you a new creature, here is a seed, that will grow in you and soon you will become the new being.

I just want it my way, which Will bring us to Step 3? I guess that's what I need to work on 3.3.3.3.3.3.3.

Thanks--

 

[LoG]

I just want it my way, which Will bring us to Step 3? I guess that's what I need to work on 3.3.3.3.3.3.3
Thanks--

Hi dyanm, I have gone through the same intellectual gymnastics but I think for me it comes down to that I simply haven't hit "bottom" yet on the smoking. I've also convinced myself that the human race might be better off if I continue smoking for now.

 

[sdmsanjose]

Dyanm quote:
“But the truth is I want God to make it easy for me--like a magic genie and He said No.”



I was discussing God’s intervention with a friend of mine that is now over 2 years clean. She was a meth addict for 26 years and now is making a lot of progress.

I told her that I was praying for God to intervene in my son’s life and help him recover from meth. She said God will not intervene but will help him if HE CHOOSES to follow God’s ways. I thought she was way off on that one but now I am wondering.

Does God take the position, I am not going to make it easy for you, you know my ways, it is up to you to take action then I will help you?

Quote from NA book “It works How and Why”
Our Higher Power will take care of our spiritual needs, but we need to participate in our own lives; we can’t simply sit back and expect God to do everything. We are responsible for our recovery” Step 3, page 31

 

[LoG]

Admitted powerlessness over alcohol

I spent many years trying to control my drinking and drugging in one way or another. At 15 years of age there was already hints that there was a problem when I overdosed on angel dust in spite of strong warnings from the dealer to only take a certain amount and I did double that. The following Sunday, I sat in the back of the church desperately praying for help. I was able to stay clean for a few months on my own but eventually started to slip back into the drug scene until the age of 20 when I came to the conclusion that the drugs were too dangerous for me and I would just drink since one could do that socially, lol.

The next 15 years was a journey into progressively worse alcoholism, earmarked by repeated attempts to control my intake in one way or another. I tried to only drink on weekends, only at home, on a full stomach, on an empty stomach, a drink every half hour, only light beer, only when I had guests, geographical cures, not hanging with certain friends, etc, etc, etc. O a few occasions throughout those years I would swear off altogether only to find myself drunk again fairly quickly. The length of time I was able to abstain through willpower became progressively shorter until a couple of years before hitting bottom I stopped trying altogether.

Christmas day 1993, I hit bottom. I realized without a doubt that I was not going to be able to stop on my own. All hope was gone and for the first time in my life I realized that "tommorrow" was not going to be better and that in fact my addiction was going to kill me within 6 months. Although I almost welcomed my death there was still enough of my upbringing left over to make me realize that it may not have been a good thing to die as an alcoholic/drugie and certainly wasn't what I had envisioned for myself while growing up.

The essential ingredient supplied by my bottom was the humility to go get help. My best efforts bankrupted me spiritually, emotionally, physically and financially. All my prayers had been inneffectual because I lacked the humility to accept the help that God deemed best for me. I looked for God to take away my "secret" problem so I wouldn't have to face others admitting that I was weak and powerless over alcohol. He on the other hand knew that I needed humility because it is pride that kills so many alcoholics.

In AA, I learned that my problem was two-fold. One, I had a mental obsession to drink or medicate in some way from the stresses of life. Without alcohol I was not able to relax or enjoy life. The more stressfull life got,the more I would think about drinking. Putting tose thoughts aside were next to impossible for any length of time and even if I did I invariably would wind up with a drink in my hand wondering how come I had succumbed to the temptation again.

Once I had a drink into me, the second part of my problem kicked in. The physical craving. As an alcoholic the physical craving was so strong that any promises I had made or principles I had,were overturned to fullfill that craving. To satisfy that craving I was willing to go to almost any lengths but it was only triggered once I had the first couple of drinks into me. It is this craving which non-alcoholics neither experience or understand. In fact I only realized the craving myself when I tried to walk away from the third drink.
It is this physical craving which makes me realize that I can never again safely pick up a drink. The mental obsession has been lifted a long time ago by the grace of God but the physical craving is still laying there dormant waiting for the day that I pick up a drink again.

My life was unmanagable.

At first I thought this referred to my life while I was drinking but if that was the case then simply putting the "plug in the jug" should have made that unmanagability disappear. That wasn't the case. Quitting drinking in fact increased my problems because now I didn't even have a way to relax enough to make sound decisions. I became restless, irritable and discontent because I no longer had the booze to help me from the reality of my life. A dry drunk. My ability to deal with life on life's terms in a sane and sober manner was totally beyond me because from the time I picked up a drink or drug at the age of 12, to deal with life, I became emotionally stunted.
This fact was brought home to me by my step-daughter when I was in the program about 6 months. She was telling me about a situation she was dealing with in school and though she was 16 at the time I realized that she was handeling the situation in a more mature manner than I was capable of myself at 35.

It was that experience and a few others like it that convinced me that simply quitting drinking was not enough. To get some managability in my life I needed to grow up and mature. This was why I needed to work through the rest of the Steps and face the challenges and fears that I tried to escape by medicating myself before.

Only in this way would I find some peace, contentment and joy.

 

[sdmsanjose]

Lion

I really enjoyed your post!

I am not an addict of alcohol or illegal drugs but I think I can spot honesty when I read it. You seem honest and knowledgeable about addiction and God’s part in helping the addict.

My son has been using illegal drugs since age 13, he is now 25. He lost everything and has absolutely nothing, has not worked in 3 years. He lives from couch to couch and comes home and lives in my metal shed in the back yard from time to time.

His drug of choice for the last few years has been Meth and he has tried to stop on his own and has lost every time. He seems completely helpless to change even though he wants to. Almost everyone I talk to says that I can do nothing but pray, he has to want to get clean.

I know he has wanted to get clean and my wife and I have prayed many times in the last several years. My only hope was that God intervenes but there are many who say that God is not going to get your son clean. There was a post on the Substance Abuse forum that said:

Post by Westoff:
“I am an crystal meth survivor. I lived through that nightmare for two years, but I was stronger than the drug. I became addicted when my gilfriend's sister, a devout Christian, got her hooked on the drug by giving her large amounts for free. I tried my best to help my girlfriend, but in the end I only got hooked myself. Her sister began selling to us and all of our friends to support her own addiction, but she made a lot of money and was dealing with extremely dangerous people. I was in a cycle and I couldn't get out. After my girlfriend's sister got arrested and had to give up legal custody of her only son, we both gave up the drugs got clean.

I am sorry to tell you, but God alone will not help your husband and neither will you. In fact, both you and God will push him further toward the drugs. The truth is crystal meth COMPLETELY changes your mental and physiological state of being. The only thing that will save your husband is to check into a rehab facility for an extended duration, coupled with intensive psychotherapy. He will need to drastically change his surroundings to get away from the people selling him the drugs. Moving often is necessary for hardcore addicts. Doing manual labor will help him immensly because both his mind and body are extremely weak. Unfortunately, jail time may also be necessary for longtime users”


My post a few days ago asked the question:
I was discussing God’s intervention with a friend of mine that is now over 2 years clean. She was a meth addict for 26 years and now is making a lot of progress.

I told her that I was praying for God to intervene in my son’s life and help him recover from meth. She said God will not intervene but will help him if HE CHOOSES to follow God’s ways. I thought she was way off on that one but now I am wondering.

Does God take the position, I am not going to make it easy for you, you know my ways, it is up to you to take action then I will help you?

Quote from NA book “It works How and Why”
Our Higher Power will take care of our spiritual needs, but we need to participate in our own lives; we can’t simply sit back and expect God to do everything. We are responsible for our recovery” Step 3, page 31


If my son is powerless over his addiction, I can do nothing to stop his addiction, and God has done His part by offering the right way but is not going to intervene, what hope is there?


Lion of God and anyone else:
Do you have any comments about the posts that I quoted above and my questions?

 

[LoG]

If my son is powerless over his addiction, I can do nothing to stop his addiction, and God has done His part by offering the right way but is not going to intervene, what hope is there?

God works in mysterious ways, His wonders to perform.

I believe that God does intervene in the alcoholic/addicts life by making it harder. I have family members that I prayed for to come to a point where they would get clean and sober. Imagine my surprise when their life became even more challenging. At first I didn't get it but as I meditated on it, I realized that I didn't hit bottom because everything was going great but because things were so bad. It was through those challenges that I came to realize my inability to cope and that i needed outside help.

As human beings we often think that we are being loving by helping someone out when in reality we are enabling them to continue their lifestyle which is the cause of their problem in the first place.
Over the years of dealing with family members who are still using I have come to realize that I hurt their chances of recovery by trying to talk them into doing something about their problem. They resent me for it and their pride balks at doing anything that might prove me right. The more I talk to them, the more they attempt to prove me wrong by continuing to use. Mentioning God only seems to add fuel to the fire.

Does that mean God is not doing anything? Well according to my bible, He seeks that which is lost and He will bring them home when they are willing to be found. I believe God is a perfect and loving gentleman and will not force someone to come home until they are willing. He can be actively working in their hearts/consiounce and the externals to help sway the decision but the decision still has to be theirs. Unfortunately we can be a stubborn lot and can take a long time to wear down if at all.

As well as being powerless over alcohol I also came to realize that i was powerless over people. To get help with that aspect I attended Al-Anon for a number of years. It was there that I started to learn about loving detachment. They taught me a lot about how to deal with those who are still in addiction by not getting into their face about it, nor by enabling their lifestyle.
There is a NA counterpart called Nar-Anon. It is for those who are affected by the addictions of family members. Its main focus is to help those family members come to some peace about the situation through working the 12 Steps into their own lives.

 

[jerry ralph]

Step 1. We admitted we were powerless over _________ and our lives had become unmanageable.

What we are powerless over was left blank because people are powerless over many different things that can make life unmanageable.

This thread is for sharing what we are powerless over and how that has caused turmoil in our lives, since it is through admitting defeat that we open our hearts and minds to another way of dealing with our powerlessness.

You have made a common mistake in quoting the first step. Bill W. stated that "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol, that our lives had become unmanageable." You quoted "We admitted we were powerless over______ and our lives had become unmanageable." There is no "and" in the first step. We admit that we are powerless.........our lives could become unmanageable because of the powerlessness, or because of the unmanageability we developed a state of powerlessness. Unmanageability is not always a result of powerlessness........in some it could be that powerlessness was a result of unmanability.

Actually the problem lies within the self. "Self-centeredness, selfishness, that we think is the problem" The self motivates the fear (we are dirven by 100 forms of fear)..............

Many think that there are two parts to this step, and I have worked this step dealing with powerlessness, and unmanageability as seperate parts, but the truth is that the step is only one part.........jerry ralph

 

[sdmsanjose]

Lion Of God quote:
“I believe that God does intervene in the alcoholic/addicts life by making it harder”

I don’t any problem believing that! My son got two tickets in the last 6 months; one for driving without a license (2nd time) and the second is for drug para (2nd time). He was supposed to go to court in September but did not show. I have contacted the courts and the police and told them where they may find him.

I don’t think the justice system can change a man’s heart and will but this may be God working through the justice system and through me. My son may start thinking about recovery and God when he is in jail; he sure has not thought about those two topics in the last several years. I think that God works through people sometimes and I sure hope this action I have taken is part of God’s plan. Maybe a miracle like the parting of the Red Sea will not occur but perhaps some good old consequences is the way God is working.


Lion Of God quote:
“As human beings we often think that we are being loving by helping someone out when in reality we are enabling them to continue their lifestyle which is the cause of their problem in the first place”

My son lives in the metal shed in the back yard sometimes. The shed has no plumbing, heating or cooling and was used for storing yard equipment. We never give him money and he is not allowed in the home alone. He does use the bathroom and laundry once in a while. He has lived from couch to couch in other places for years and that did not change him. Actually we are enabling him in a small way but I decided that it is time that we come first for a change. Myself and the rest of the family are much better off when we see him 2 or 3 times a week than when he is gone for months at a time.


Lion Of God quote:
“The more I talk to them, the more they attempt to prove me wrong by continuing to use. Mentioning God only seems to add fuel to the fire”

The last time I talked to him about addiction and God was last year 2005

I am ready to give up it is just that I do not want to fail to do my part if there is a my part. I pray to God but do not get audible answers or signs. It seems to me if God answers my prayers it is through action events. The two tickets are action events and it may be my part to contact the authorities to have him suffer the consequences so that he can start thinking about a life style change.

I don’t believe 100% that family can do nothing. I believe that God uses family often. If I am not in God’s plan to help my son I will gladly step aside, I do not want anymore of this defeat!

Anything that you want to comment about would be appreciated. I know I do not think like an addict and this experience is going to take God’s intervention in some way if it is going to succeed. I visit several addiction boards but this one is a Christian Forum and that is my faith so naturally a Christian addict’s input would be valuable to me.

 

[LoG]

Anything that you want to comment about would be appreciated. I know I do not think like an addict and this experience is going to take God’s intervention in some way if it is going to succeed.

For myself I have found that God often will not intervene in some thing or situation until I completely let go and surrender. When I get involved in trying to control an outcome it tends to have disastrous consequences that achieve the opposite effect. This is what Step 1 is all about.

My other comment is about your lack of comment on Al-Anon or Nar-Anon. Both those programs have been instrumental in helping family members to cope with active addiction in others and through the principles and suggestions there have brought those others to the doors of AA and NA.

 

[sdmsanjose]

Lion of God Quote:
“For myself I have found that God often will not intervene in some thing or situation until I completely let go and surrender. When I get involved in trying to control an outcome it tends to have disastrous consequences that achieve the opposite effect. This is what Step 1 is all about.”


I generally agree with your statement most of the time but you said “often” not always, right? You also said “When I get involved in trying to control the outcome it tends to have disastrous consequences”. You seem to think that I am trying to control the outcome of my son’s situation. I know just enough about addiction to know that I did not cause it, cannot control it, and cannot cure it. Furthermore, in the beginning I did try to control it and after many defeats even a simple-minded person like me could see that without God you do not have a chance with addiction.

I am saying that God SOMETIMES uses action events and people to help other people. Do you agree with that statement? In my case I am wondering if the action events (my son getting arrested and failing to go to court) that occurred in the last few weeks is requiring me to take some action. Do I do nothing when I know that he has a warrant for his arrest and he is sometimes staying on my property and in my shed?

Lion, you said “ I believe that God does intervene in the alcoholic/addicts life by making it harder.” I do too, that is why I think that I may be part of God’s plan by informing the police as to where they may find him. When they put him in jail, will that not make his life harder? He sure has not changed by being out of jail for the last several years.

If you think that I enjoy trying to control this situation you are mistaken. God has used people many times in my life to help me so I do not think that “Let Go and Let God” applies always in every situation. If it is the person who has dreamed up the plan then YES it will have no lasting affect. However, If God is using me in HIS plan then I do not want to take the position of doing nothing. I had absolute nothing to do with my son getting two charges, getting arrested, and not showing up for court. My wife and I have been praying for months and this is the first sign that something may change. Does God want me to ignore the law? Does God want me to have nothing to do with helping my son face up to his consequences? Do you think that I should do nothing when I know he has violated the law and he is on my property? When you and I agree that making life harder is one of the ways God works, should I not help the authorities to bring him into a harder life?

The police got a call several weeks ago from a woman that said she saw a man with a gun at 1:30 in the mourning. The police came to check it out and my son rode his bike right by them and they followed him to my home and arrested him. The police searched everywhere and did not find a gun. They took my son so the reporting woman could see him and the woman said that my son was not the man. The police searched the shed and found drug paraphernalia. Was it just a coincidence that he rode his bike at 1:30 in the morning right by the exact spot that the gunman was reported?

Right now I feel that God has directed the events in the last few weeks and that my son going to jail is the next move in God’s plan. If I am wrong then I will have no trouble giving up this exhausting job that I detest. I do not want to be part of another defeat, I will gladly back away!

Lion of God quote
“My other comment is about your lack of comment on Al-Anon or Nar-Anon. Both those programs have been instrumental in helping family members to cope with active addiction in others and through the principles and suggestions there have brought those others to the doors of AA and NA.”



I have attended several AA, NA and Al-Anon meetings in the past. The AA and NA meeting were very informative but they both suggested as you did that I go to AL-Anon or Nar-Anon. Because we do not have a Nar-Anon I went to a few Al-Anon meetings. I found that some enjoyed dominating the conversation with their war stories and generally just said I could do nothing. I do not believe that then and I do not believe that now if God’s plan includes the family.
However, I may be wrong and if I am I will tell you. I am not interested convincing anyone that I am right I am interested in doing the right thing so that my son has a better chance of recovering. If that means doing nothing I am more than willing to do that right away!

Lion of God, I know you are trying to help me and I appreciate that very much. Frankly I am not 100% sure that I am right and want your input but I have to tell you how I see it for now. I think that a lot will be revealed in the next 12 months and that is another reason that I am writing to this forum. I want to see how God is going to handle this situation.

 

[formykidsiwill]

Step 1. We admitted we were powerless over _________ and our lives had become unmanageable.

What we are powerless over was left blank because people are powerless over many different things that can make life unmanageable.

This thread is for sharing what we are powerless over and how that has caused turmoil in our lives, since it is through admitting defeat that we open our hearts and minds to another way of dealing with our powerlessness.

Ok. I have a hard time being honest with MYSELF here. I've been sober from alcohol for one year Nov. 1st. From other drugs (street drugs same) but prescription drugs 2 days! I have trouble being honest with myself, again. I know that my body doesn't know the difference. If I put a narcotic in my body I start the vicious cycle. I can't live like that anymore. I say I am powerless over everything, and I mean that, but do I really have to break it down and fill in the blanks here, I really want to be serious. I LOST all my peace and serenity after I started using pain pills. I had my baby July 10th. C-section. The Dr. (which I did not tell about my addiction, on purpose, I WANTED the pills) BUT, after my script ran out, I started buying them from other people who had scripts. Then I told one on my 'key' people in AA about it. (this is how I trick myself!!!) I rationalize to myself that by getting on here and being honest and by telling her (not my sponsor) woooo, am I being TOO honest.......for the internet....this is messing with my mind....I'm just jumping in here wiht both feet, but maybe my experiences can help someone else. I am off the pills. I am re working the steps.

I found a pill on my dresser today. I put it in the bottle (incase I wanted it) then I remembered that once I put ONE in me, I'll be POWERLESS, so I flushed it.

So, I understand now why we is so important...

In the meeting someone pointed out how much I say I.....

Ok, for now that's all I've got..


Thanks.

 

[LoG]

Does God want me to ignore the law? Does God want me to have nothing to do with helping my son face up to his consequences? Do you think that I should do nothing when I know he has violated the law and he is on my property? When you and I agree that making life harder is one of the ways God works, should I not help the authorities to bring him into a harder life?

Alcoholics/addicts tend to hit bottom when things happen to them that out of their control. If I put myself in your son's shoes my answer to you turning me into the authorities would be to cut all ties to you since you would be a controllable threat to my well-being.

There is a fine line between what is enabling someone to continue in their addictions and when one is trying to control or manufacture a particular outcome.

. I found that some enjoyed dominating the conversation with their war stories and generally just said I could do nothing. I do not believe that then and I do not believe that now if God’s plan includes the family.

During the years of my recovery I have found that God tends to send the answers through those who I have the most difficulty in accepting or listening to. Recovery from both active addiction and codependency requires a humble heart and a seeking of greater humility to be able to accept God's healing.

I want to see how God is going to handle this situation

Then Let go and Let God as one of our slogans says.

 

[stelow]

If I put myself in your son's shoes my answer to you turning me into the authorities would be to cut all ties to you since you would be a controllable threat to my well-being. /quote]

You did read the part about her son having a warrant for his arrest and is hiding out in her backyard shed. She would be breaking the law by not turning him in.

 

[sdmsanjose]

Sdmsanjose’s question to Lion of God on October 11
I am saying that God SOMETIMES uses action events and people to help other people. Do you agree with that statement? In my case I am wondering if the action events (my son getting arrested and failing to go to court) that occurred in the last few weeks is requiring me to take some action.


Lion of God you did not answer my question above but you did answer another question I asked. You said:


Lion of God’s response on October 15
“Alcoholics/addicts tend to hit bottom when things happen to them that out of their control. If I put myself in your son's shoes my answer to you turning me into the authorities would be to cut all ties to you since you would be a controllable threat to my well-being.
There is a fine line between what is enabling someone to continue in their addictions and when one is trying to control or manufacture a particular outcome.”


Sdmsanjose’s update at 11-5-06
I did turn my son into the police and they arrested him. Lion, my son did not ‘…cut all ties…” with me. My son called me from jail several days after he was arrested and said the following, “Dad I am not mad at you, you did the best thing for me, I love you”

Lion, you seem to think that I am trying to “…control or manufacture a particular outcome” Perhaps that is why you did not answer my question in bold above in the first paragraph. . I did not manufacture the crime my son did, I did not manufacture my son getting caught with drug para, I did not control my son so that he did not show up for court, I did not manufacture the warrant for his arrest. I did turn my son into the authorities because I believe it is what God expected me to do. Do you disagree?

Apparently you do not think that God is using me to help my son. I feel that I am not trying to ‘…control or Manufacture a particular outcome “ I am following God’s plan by responding appropriately to the circumstances that have been presented to me Yes, I believe it is God’s plan for my son to go to jail. He has been running free in society for many many years and he has not been sober long enough to think clearly. I think that God uses pain to get your attention. A few Biblical references for my saying that is the story of Jonah and the Prodigal Son.

I DO NOT believe that you or I or God will override my son’s free will choices but I do believe that God uses people in His plan and uses people to help other people. I believe that God is using me in His plan to help my son and it seems that you do not.

Lion, I think you are a godly man but at this point I think you are wrong.

 

[LoG]

Lion of God you did not answer my question above but you did answer another question I asked. You said:

Answering that question would have then put me in the position where I was trying to force a particular outcome. Instead I only shared how I would have reacted to what you were planning.

I did turn my son into the authorities because I believe it is what God expected me to do. Do you disagree?

Apparently you do not think that God is using me to help my son. I feel that I am not trying to ‘…control or Manufacture a particular outcome “ I am following God’s plan by responding appropriately to the circumstances that have been presented to me Yes, I believe it is God’s plan for my son to go to jail. He has been running free in society for many many years and he has not been sober long enough to think clearly. I think that God uses pain to get your attention. A few Biblical references for my saying that is the story of Jonah and the Prodigal Son.

I DO NOT believe that you or I or God will override my son’s free will choices but I do believe that God uses people in His plan and uses people to help other people. I believe that God is using me in His plan to help my son and it seems that you do not.

That's not for me to judge. If you believe that this is what God's will was for you to do then I am glad that you looked for that answer from God.

There was a post not long ago where a wife phoned her husbands employer to inform them of his drug use on the job. The husband was fired and he then decided to file for a divorce because of it. The wife couldn't understand why.
I had that incident in mind when I posted my responses to you.

Your situation turned out well, hers didn't.

Lion, I think you are a godly man but at this point I think you are wrong.

I certainly have no problem admitting that I am wrong and am glad that I was. In my responses to you however I shared how I would have reacted had I been your son and responded to your questions in how I would have handled it, if I was in your shoes. I believe that is what you were looking for when you first started to post about this.

Perhaps as God has used you to intervene in your sons life, He has used me to intervene in yours by again strongly suggesting attendance at al-anon meetings for you and your spouse.





[/quote]

 

[sdmsanjose]

Lion's quote
Perhaps as God has used you to intervene in your sons life, He has used me to intervene in yours by again strongly suggesting attendance at al-anon meetings for you and your spouse.

I will keep Al-anon in my mind and I do love their principles. Lion, God has already used you to help me. Your testimony about your life and your passion to help others is a very encouraging spirit.
Thank you my friend!!

 

[Prodigal7]

Hi everybody,

I've been sober about five years and have enjoyed reading this thread. My heart goes out to anyone watching a loved one go through the turmoil of active addiction.

Why some people "hit bottom and recover" and why some people "hit bottom and choose to live there" is a great mystery. I think some people don't believe they can truly enjoy life without chemicals. Sometimes people need to "dry out" before they get sober. Their brains are changed and they are incapable of getting sober without drying out first.

Meth truly seems to be the devil's drug. I read only 7% of Meth addicts get and stay clean. That being said, I've seen numerous Meth addicts get and stay clean. It takes hard work however.

Without a solid first step I believe it is impossible to stay sober. I've noticed that if people get clean and things get "too good too quick" they tend to not stay sober though there is no hard and fast rule.

The Big Book clearly states if someone does not want to be sober we are wasting our time talking to that person. Does God plant the desire to be sober? I do not know.

I lost a lot before getting sober. I used to curse God for being an alcoholic. Finally I came to the conclusion that God wants me sober. Once I stopped fighting it got easier.

 

[angelgabrielle1973]

I know and admit I am powerless over my alcohol addiction. I have tried many times to quit through will power but that got me no where. I tried prayer but I always fell. I know I can not do this on my own so I am very thankful to the Lord for providing the strength and courage to join AA.

Also, when I gave my life over to God in March of 2004, I didn't give it all to him. I only gave him a little bit. But in reading The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren, I have learned that God has established a beach-head in my life / body, and slowly he is overtaking other areas of my life such as my sexuality and now my alcohol addiction. In joining AA, I'm actually saying, God, I give this addiction over to you. Help me to overcome.



In Christ,
~Angel Gabrielle~