Something every single person on this board needs to know

[UberLutheran]

In another thread, Brieuse stated this perfectly:

A tip is to think what you would say if you were speaking to that person face to face. If you wouldn't say it, don't post it.

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As tempting as it is to want to "squelch" our opponents once and for all, it behooves us all (me included) to remember that our opponent is someone created in the image of God (just as we all are) who is a flesh-and-blood person with feelings who can (and very well may be) hurt by our carefully-crafted pithy phrase or our "gotcha" statement.

I'm guilty of this, too: a couple of my character defects are a penchant for brutal honesty and an ability to craft words with surgical steel precision (which also cut with surgical steel precision).

If what we're about to post is something we would never say to another person when speaking to that person face to face, or it's something which would offend us were that thing said to us -- then don't post it.

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[ReformedChapin]

In another thread, Brieuse stated this perfectly:

A tip is to think what you would say if you were speaking to that person face to face. If you wouldn't say it, don't post it.​

As tempting as it is to want to "squelch" our opponents once and for all, it behooves us all (me included) to remember that our opponent is someone created in the image of God (just as we all are) who is a flesh-and-blood person with feelings who can (and very well may be) hurt by our carefully-crafted pithy phrase or our "gotcha" statement.

I'm guilty of this, too: a couple of my character defects are a penchant for brutal honesty and an ability to craft words with surgical steel precision (which also cut with surgical steel precision).

If what we're about to post is something we would never say to another person when speaking to that person face to face, or it's something which would offend us were that thing said to us -- then don't post it.

​

I agree partially, I have been trying to watch what I post but I have slipped a few times. There is a difference in dynamics when posting in a forum than having a debate in person. We have more access to resources and we can articulate ourselves differently on a written format.

We should focus more on debating the material rather than each other. I have been jumped on here WAY too many times on issues that had nothing to do with what we are debating insted focusing on my "character" than the topic at hand. If you want to offer advice to people about how they should grow in Christ do it with a PM not on the forum (this goes for everyone including myself).

 

[BAFRIEND]

If I wrote what I would tell certain folks to their face in person, after the very first time, I would be permanently banned from CF.

So this advice is not for all.

 

[UberLutheran]

If I wrote what I would tell certain folks to their face in person, after the very first time, I would be permanently banned from CF.

So this advice is not for all.

Hmmm. Then maybe it's even more apropos to the OP.

Interesting: people tell others exactly what they think of others, in no uncertain terms, with no tact and no empathy for the feelings of others -- and then those same people wonder why they're not liked.

In the worst case scenario and they're like some people I know, they wonder why they're alone and lonely when they're old.

I knew one exceptionally bitter gay man who, after spending a lifetime spilling his venom at everybody with whom he came in contact, finally died. Most people were relieved. Counting the minister and me (I played at his funeral), there were six people attending his funeral and no one went to the interment.

That is not the way I would want to be remembered.