So, uh...Where is He?

[fluffy_rainbow]

Is it my imagination, or is there no man out there who I see eye to eye with? Where are the men who:

1. Are praying for a woman like me?
2. Are maintaining their purity?
3. Desire to save even a kiss for their wedding day?
4. Are mature enough in their walk to be my spiritual leader?
5. Strive to be christlike every single day?
6. Who take their faith seriously not just using it as a hobby or a "label"?

Oh! Where is he? I'm not so hung up on what his hobbies are, his chosen profession, or the way he looks. I'm just wondering...I know there has to be men like this out there so where are they hiding because they ain't in my church, workplace, or local coffee shop.

 

[unimportantbuthisnameis]

There are men like that out there. But I can's tell you where as I am not looking for him, but if I happen to meet him I'll let you know. Keep looking, and continue praying for him.

 

[OhhJim]

I don't know you well enough to speak to #1, but as for the rest...no, I don't know any. Sorry.

 

[hope95]

If you find him, ask if he has a brother.

 

[boilerblues]

We're out here, I often ask the same question about the women. It's waiting on God's timing for it. You didn't pray for patience, did you? You know how He likes to answer that one.....

Hang in there, it'll come. I keep getting told you'll find it when you're not looking for it. Find your contentment in Christ, seek His Kingdom first....I'm sure you've heard the rest too many times.

 

[gvsuman]

its ok everyone, I'm here now


just kidding.....I like to think of myself as fitting into that mold, besides #1 of course only because I don't know what you are like. I'm sure there are other guys exactly like that out there somewhere, you just have to let God bring him to you when he thinks your ready for him to come along.

 

[Fatolia]

May I ask, just for knowledge sake, how long have you been seeking these six things?

Is it my imagination, or is there no man out there who I see eye to eye with? Where are the men who:

1. Are praying for a woman like me?
2. Are maintaining their purity?
3. Desire to save even a kiss for their wedding day?
4. Are mature enough in their walk to be my spiritual leader?
5. Strive to be christlike every single day?
6. Who take their faith seriously not just using it as a hobby or a "label"?

Oh! Where is he? I'm not so hung up on what his hobbies are, his chosen profession, or the way he looks. I'm just wondering...I know there has to be men like this out there so where are they hiding because they ain't in my church, workplace, or local coffee shop.

 

[Matt.9:22]

Is it my imagination, or is there no man out there who I see eye to eye with? Where are the men who:

1. Are praying for a woman like me?
2. Are maintaining their purity?
3. Desire to save even a kiss for their wedding day?
4. Are mature enough in their walk to be my spiritual leader?
5. Strive to be christlike every single day?
6. Who take their faith seriously not just using it as a hobby or a "label"?

Oh! Where is he? I'm not so hung up on what his hobbies are, his chosen profession, or the way he looks. I'm just wondering...I know there has to be men like this out there so where are they hiding because they ain't in my church, workplace, or local coffee shop.

7. Don't forget chivalrous. If you with your buddies and you see me holding a door, take it from me instead of walking through it.
8. Doesn't cuss in or out of my presence
9. Doesn't try to treat me like one of the guys (I don't want to hear about the other females you've been in a relationship.)

These are a few that I wanted to add to this already really good list.

 

[TriptychR]

I truly don't mean to offend you, but how well have you truly been seeking some of these requirements in your own life? Do you feel mature in your walk? Do you strive to be Christ-like every day, or do you find yourself slipping up every now and then like the majority of us? Are you looking for someone superhuman?

 

[Christ Aficionado]

I see eye to eye with you on everything you listed, except let me just say that Number 3 would be really tough for a lot of guys. That's almost like saying no holding hands.

If you tell us more about yourself (hobbies, etc.) then I'm sure there are guys in this forum that will come out of their shell and introduce themselves to you...

 

[Sketcher]

Seriously, Fluffy, you just came back to the Lord. IMHO, you're looking for a mate when that shouldn't be your top priority. Building your faith and commitment to God should come first. It's great how you've returned to Christianity and Christian values, but there's a lot of strength that you need yet. You need to be a whole person without a man in your life, letting God be your reason to live and filling your needs. Being content and whole without that special someone is the best way to prepare for married life, and single life as well. Otherwise, I don't think any relationship with a man that you pursue will get too far off the ground.

 

[renaistre]

7. Don't forget chivalrous. If you with your buddies and you see me holding a door, take it from me instead of walking through it.
8. Doesn't cuss in or out of my presence
9. Doesn't try to treat me like one of the guys (I don't want to hear about the other females you've been in a relationship.)

These are a few that I wanted to add to this already really good list.

I think you could include #7 and #8 under #5. But it doesn't really matter. It's still a good list.

I don't know anyone who could say "yup, that's me," but I do know several guys (including myself) who would say that this list matches up with their goals. So maybe wait a few years and then they will be perfect (slight good-natured sarcasm applies here.)

Personally, #4 scares me the most. I've been a believer since I was 5, and I've never really strayed. But I have wasted a lot of time that could have been used better, and I don't feel that I'm ready yet to take on the responsability of being the spiritual leader of a family.

So where are we? (Those of us that are at least similar to what you describe, that is.) Well one guy, for example is attending Cal State Long Beach with a criminal justice major, intending to go into the Coast Guard as a helicopter pilot. To meet me, it would be best to either attend my church or study electrical engineering at Cal State Northridge. An other guy I know can be found at most of the bluegrass festivals around Southern California with his dad, mom, brother, and 9 sisters. An other one is a poet who actually does real cowboy work. Guys like us are out here. Don't give up hope.

#1, of course, could mean different things. Does "a woman like me" mean a committed Christian? Someone with a similar life story? Someone looking for a guy like this? Someone from your state?

Also, I don't know your exact situation, but I think twistedsketch's post is worth a good look.

 

[fluffy_rainbow]

Ah, I fear that most post has come across the wrong way. It isn't so much that I'm looking for a mate. I know that I am not ready for that just yet. God has alot of work to do on me before I am ready for a husband. I was just wondering if there were men out there who possessed the qualities I listed. Even in the churches and other Christian social circles (from what I have observed) they seem non-existent.

 

[Fatolia]

...men out there who possessed the qualities I listed.

So they don't possess your qualities, they're just possessed!

 

[hockeysistah12]

I'm 45 and I've done all the right things, prayed and seeked the lord, in fellowship continually and involved in the church. Yet sometimes I think that no mate is outhere for me because of one or two things (1) I'm not a "barbie doll", which Christian men seek, (2) I have to be rich--now I do work and hold down a job, however, it seems like men wants the fine car and the house and the "image" (3) you are not the right "race". Now I'm African American and that should be secondly to people, but yet, people are afraid to date me and the last relationship, the man said he "loved me" only to lie and abandon me. And yes, he is a "Christian" who I met online and is a pastor. And I do have that fear that no one will take a chance on a person like me. I'm not trying to whine or even cry about it, but there are times that I get angry at God because of it and the issue of being a widow comes in play too.

 

[TriptychR]

Can any of us ever do all the right things?

 

[boilerblues]

There are a lot of fantastic guys out there, I think I've got something to offer too. If that's God's plan for your life then He will bring them around at the right time.

Unfortunately there's no guarantee that God's going to provide anyone for any of us. We pretty much have two choices, we can sit around and be bitter about it and miss out on life. Or we can say "Lord, You know the desires of my heart. This is something that I'd like to have, but I am made complete in You and You alone. I will be thankful for your blessings and serve You faithfully where You have placed me in life."

 

[fluffy_rainbow]

Can any of us ever do all the right things?

Of course. Even if it's only for one woman. Obviously you aren't going to be all the right things to all women, but what is more beneficial?

A) Being a few of the right things to several of the wrong woman

or

B) Being all the right things to one right woman?

 

[hockeysistah12]

There are a lot of fantastic guys out there, I think I've got something to offer too. If that's God's plan for your life then He will bring them around at the right time.

Unfortunately there's no guarantee that God's going to provide anyone for any of us. We pretty much have two choices, we can sit around and be bitter about it and miss out on life. Or we can say "Lord, You know the desires of my heart. This is something that I'd like to have, but I am made complete in You and You alone. I will be thankful for your blessings and serve You faithfully where You have placed me in life."

I'm not being bitter about it, believe you me, but understand where I am coming from too because I am an older single and a widow, its hard to find someone of quality in the faith. I do also have dreams about being married again and I believe that God has placed those dreams, but it seem that if you are either a divorced or never married single, you have a better chance of finding someone without the stigma of your status.

Yes, I do want to be complete in him and that is one of my goals this next year...