Singleness: Obstacle or Opportunity

[Stanfi]

I've been listening to a preaching tape by Charles Stanley with this title. I would like to recommend it. I got it from his website at intouch.org

Anyway on this subject: Before I got the tape, I had been doing some studying on Singleness. For years I thought it was a curse, but I have come to realize that it is a blessing from God. I have realized that as a single person, I have more freedoms than a married persons. I also don't have many of the finacial responsibilites or the responsibility of taking care of a family. I also have more free time to help others and do things for the Lord.

I believe that you have to be thankful for what God has already given you, if you ever expect him to give you anything else. Think of this way, you give a friend a Christmas present. Instead of thanking you for it, they yell and fuss at you. Are you going to give them something next year?

I thought this might be a good thread. Any comments?

 

[pinPoint]

i like that ^^^ thats good! i also think of it as a Blessing. thanks for reminding us what it is all about. good day.

pin

 

[esseJ]

I say opportunity....I'm living a dream of mine this winter...I'm renting a place in Breckenridge and skiing the winter away...think I could do that with a wife?

also, I'm looking at a few ministries that hire for overseas ministry...couln't necessarily do that with a wife either...(Not unless she wanted to go as well)

So I say opportunity....JMHO

 

[psycmajor]

Great thread! Some people may see it as a bad thing, but sometimes God just intends it to be that way. Savor the freedom (but without sinning).

 

[Hewitt]

Great thoughts, it reminds me of Paul's words in 1 Corinthians chapter seven.

 

[wvmtnkid]

Agreed! Life is what you make of it. For a time in my life I was miserable as a single. It just wasn't what I wanted. Now granted there are days that I am less than thrilled with that status. But I decided that I needed to embrace what the Lord had given me and accept the circumstances I had been dealt. I try to seen the things that I have been able to do because I am single that I would not be able to do if I were married and I try to take advantage of that. I still pray that if it is God's will that he will provide for me a godly husband, but I try not to make that my focal point in life anymore. There are just too many things out there that I haven't done yet, and that's what I have decided to concentrate on. Plus, there are many serving opportunities that I can be a part of. I guess really there just comes a time when you have to change your mindset about being single. You can decide to be single and miserable or single and content. And really, which do you think would be more attractive, for either friends or that special someone?

 

[Stanfi]

And really, which do you think would be more attractive, for either friends or that special someone?

This right here is very true. If you are so misearable that you don't even like being with yourself, more than likely noone esle is going to want to spend time with you either. I think people like to be around people who are fun and full of life, not those who are down and miserable. If everytime that someone sees you that first thought they have is "How bad of a mood are they in today?" Then I don't think anyone is going to be around you to much.

 

[jfreak]

I say opportunity most of the time because I am free to do whatever I want whenever I want with out having to clear things with "the boss" J/K I like the freedom but wouldn't mind a relationship. God has His own timing for life.

 

[desi]

I've heard the Chinese meaning of problem also means opportunity. Wherever you are is where God can use you if you avail yourself to him and if you avail yourself to him good things are in store for you!

 

[wvmtnkid]

Very profound, desi! I like that.

 

[Ronan]

Yea being single is a blessing. My friends say i am in "Denial". Asked them whats a river in Egypt got do with any thing?
And the longer you are single the more you learn about waiting on the Lord. Which for some people (like me). Is a very hard and long leason to learn.
Prase you Lord Jesus for your Blessings.

 

[desper84unity]

okay, sure singleness is definitely an opportunity.

However, if a person is so hyped up on hormones they feel they just gotta get married and have sex, they should prepare themselves as quickly as possible for the responsibilities, and get out and find a good mate.

 

[jfreak]

one, or two words... self-control. I find it very useful in being single

 

[Risen Tree]

I honestly think singleness is overrated in many Christian circles today. It is often misused as a liscense to sin instead of an opportunity to grow closer to God. When the day that singleness is to end approaches, it should not be delayed.

 

[SpiritPsalmist]

I've been listening to a preaching tape by Charles Stanley with this title. I would like to recommend it. I got it from his website at intouch.org

Anyway on this subject: Before I got the tape, I had been doing some studying on Singleness. For years I thought it was a curse, but I have come to realize that it is a blessing from God. I have realized that as a single person, I have more freedoms than a married persons. I also don't have many of the finacial responsibilites or the responsibility of taking care of a family. I also have more free time to help others and do things for the Lord.

I believe that you have to be thankful for what God has already given you, if you ever expect him to give you anything else. Think of this way, you give a friend a Christmas present. Instead of thanking you for it, they yell and fuss at you. Are you going to give them something next year?

I thought this might be a good thread. Any comments?

I agree with you Mrstace,

I've never been married, although I've had the opportunity, and I find much freedom to server God better than many of my married friends. While the woman are constantly fussing over their children and husbands (as they should), I am free to fuss over God.

I'm not saying that I don't ever want to be married but I want it to be the person God sends not just someone I pick because I'm feeling lonely at the time.

I don't view my singleness as an opportunity to sin. I view it as time to prepare myself more for Him and to learn to walk closer to Him. . .avoiding sin just as we all should.

Quaffer

 

[Blank123]

very good thread

we are not to look at this time in our lives as a curse but as a blessing as you say. looking at our singleness as a curse accomplishes absolutely nothing except to make us bitter n our hearts. There are so many opprotunities for us to get out there now and live and serve God now we don't need to wait to find a mate in orde to do that.

'in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.' - 1 Thess 5:18

 

[Highland Watchman]

I was actually reminded of some of the blessings of being single earlier this week. I was sitting and talking to a pastor who had gone through similar storms as I have gone through. I was thinking at first that it might almost be easier to go through some of those storms while married, but he actually disproved that case. See, a pastor's spouse has certain pressures even on them, and when the church experience gets sour for the pastor, it gets VERY sour for the pastor's family. And when the finances suddenly stop or just begin hanging on by a thread, and there seems to be no prospect or hope of things getting much better, it is much easier if you are only having to think of keeping YOUR head above water, let alone trying to support a family (even if that family is only you and your S/O).

It was mentioned earlier that it is easier to serve God when your single. I would agree to a point - there are some things that it is a lot easier to do (like move around, or take mission trips, or go to school, etc.), but there are also things that we singles are not so able to do that our married friends are so much better at (like raising the next generation), and to deny our human nature (which craves the human intimacy that only marriage can provide while staying in the will of God) is not the wisest course of action.

I think it is out of this nature and craving that the idea of singleness being a burden or a curse comes into play, especially when the media touts sex and intimate relationships as the ultimate experience and God's expectations are that it is to be reserved for marriage only. God made man and woman to be opposite sides of a coin, both wanting to be with the other side to make a whole coin. Both sides of the coin point to God, just as both are different and unique. But he created us to be in relationship with one another, which is why the drive is so strong sometimes.

So, to answer your quesion, I would have to say both. It is an opportunity/blessing in that we are free of the extra "burden" that a family can put on us when we are not ready... But it is also an obstacle/burden in that it is not according to the ORIGINAL plan of God before the Fall, and we have the problems of loneliness and our sexuality to contend with...

 

[beetlequeendiva]

Sometimes I see singleness as a blessing because I am free to do what I want and I can go any where I want to minister to others, othertimes I see it as a curse simply because I want to be married

 

[mina]

I don't think of it as either a blessing or a curse. I think it's both all mixed up- just like every season of life is. I can enjoy singleness but yet at the same time desire to care for a family. Wherever you are in life you have to be thankful for what you have, yet be honest with God about you want. I don't think it's wrong for single people to want to be married as long as they are waiting on God and trying to follow His will for them in their lives.

 

[JPPT1974]

Being single is really to me a blessing since I don't have nobody to be responsible for and just look after myself as I have enough worries already. Not that I don't care though because I do. Maybe God wants me to be single in His will and way.