Hi there.
I have a question regarding money and marriage... I appreciate the time, thought and prayer given to me in answering if possible...
My fiance and I are planning on getting married in March of 09. I met him in a church group last year. We have been dating almost a month shy of a year. We really do love each other, have a very communicative relationship. We want to commit our lives to live with each other and help each other grow as Christians and one day have a family and be there as best friends for each other. Our parents approve, the church and our pastor approves, we are going through biblical counseling and we both get along with our families very well and want God to be strongly in our relationship.
Here are some problems...I feel like we moved too fast. I feel guilty. We 'just knew' we were going to be married and he asked me to marry him in May, 6 months into the relationship. We do have a great one and we wish we were married months ago. He is a full-time college student with 2-3 years left of school. We are so close with each other and with the Lord that the waiting is very hard. Especially sexually to the point we don't kiss anymore on the lips because of the sexual temptation.
We also both have part-time jobs. He is in school so he can only have a part-time job and I have a very rewarding job part-time and there aren't many full-time positions available with the economy right now. He just started his new job and doesn't know his income yet compared to mine to see if we can make it financially to live on our own.
He is not worried and feels we can make it, meanwhile I am VERY worried and feel like we may just scrape by. Between us we'll have at the very least 10,000 in savings by the time we get married if we do in March.
This whole experience I am going back and forth with a wedding date and understanding money. I knwo I drive him nuts even though he is patient with me. I know I need to trust and be a good steward. I am very confused of what to do. Also I have been given the gift of visual arts and writing and I have an online shop to sell Christian-themed encouragement cards. I am unsure if it is a sin to make money off of that since I am not a preacher. I know it can help the income and especially if and when we have kids I can work from home to help...but is it a sin?
My second question is this:
I felt like we were moving too fast because it all seemed so fast in our relationship. We spend a lot of time with each other and we share a lot communication-wise. I have gone through a struggle of just me...literally in my family and almost zero friends before my fiance that were Christian. Everything was revolved around God. it was awesome and when I started making new friends at a good church and in a relationship with my fiance I felt like it was harder to be with God all the time. I struggled. I wanted to be with God more and I missed Him and I was also so excited to have met the godly man I never knew I wanted!! I went back and forth. I did not abandon God but I srtuggled and I wanted to push through because I knew one day I will have to. Lately I have been praying more and focusing more on God through this time of wondering if we should wat 6 months or a year and a half for his next break from school ot be married, or longer which really makes us upset. I feel like maybe I was idolizing the wedding and my fiance and I was excited yes, but worried that I was. I want God first and we pray with each other and I have been trying to do more for God and He has aslo given us provision....like I got a wedding gown 2 months early for a hundred dollars new form a Christian woman. The whole expereince was chance and by God no doubt. He provided my fiance and I with a job ...while others we know have applied 20 or more places and no such blessing. Eeveryhting seems to be getting into place.
I still feel weird. We set the date and yet I am thinking we should wait to see if in 2 months how much we make between us and budget wise.
Also I wondered if waiting would be a sacrifice to God to show Him He comes first before my fiance and marriage, It would be painful and all and thus a sacrifice. I feel at peace either way. I asked for forgiveness of sins and trying hard to repent and I just dunno what to do. Can you help sort this out for me?
I have a question regarding money and marriage... I appreciate the time, thought and prayer given to me in answering if possible...
My fiance and I are planning on getting married in March of 09. I met him in a church group last year. We have been dating almost a month shy of a year. We really do love each other, have a very communicative relationship. We want to commit our lives to live with each other and help each other grow as Christians and one day have a family and be there as best friends for each other. Our parents approve, the church and our pastor approves, we are going through biblical counseling and we both get along with our families very well and want God to be strongly in our relationship.
Here are some problems...I feel like we moved too fast. I feel guilty. We 'just knew' we were going to be married and he asked me to marry him in May, 6 months into the relationship. We do have a great one and we wish we were married months ago. He is a full-time college student with 2-3 years left of school. We are so close with each other and with the Lord that the waiting is very hard. Especially sexually to the point we don't kiss anymore on the lips because of the sexual temptation.
We also both have part-time jobs. He is in school so he can only have a part-time job and I have a very rewarding job part-time and there aren't many full-time positions available with the economy right now. He just started his new job and doesn't know his income yet compared to mine to see if we can make it financially to live on our own.
He is not worried and feels we can make it, meanwhile I am VERY worried and feel like we may just scrape by. Between us we'll have at the very least 10,000 in savings by the time we get married if we do in March.
This whole experience I am going back and forth with a wedding date and understanding money. I knwo I drive him nuts even though he is patient with me. I know I need to trust and be a good steward. I am very confused of what to do. Also I have been given the gift of visual arts and writing and I have an online shop to sell Christian-themed encouragement cards. I am unsure if it is a sin to make money off of that since I am not a preacher. I know it can help the income and especially if and when we have kids I can work from home to help...but is it a sin?
My second question is this:
I felt like we were moving too fast because it all seemed so fast in our relationship. We spend a lot of time with each other and we share a lot communication-wise. I have gone through a struggle of just me...literally in my family and almost zero friends before my fiance that were Christian. Everything was revolved around God. it was awesome and when I started making new friends at a good church and in a relationship with my fiance I felt like it was harder to be with God all the time. I struggled. I wanted to be with God more and I missed Him and I was also so excited to have met the godly man I never knew I wanted!! I went back and forth. I did not abandon God but I srtuggled and I wanted to push through because I knew one day I will have to. Lately I have been praying more and focusing more on God through this time of wondering if we should wat 6 months or a year and a half for his next break from school ot be married, or longer which really makes us upset. I feel like maybe I was idolizing the wedding and my fiance and I was excited yes, but worried that I was. I want God first and we pray with each other and I have been trying to do more for God and He has aslo given us provision....like I got a wedding gown 2 months early for a hundred dollars new form a Christian woman. The whole expereince was chance and by God no doubt. He provided my fiance and I with a job ...while others we know have applied 20 or more places and no such blessing. Eeveryhting seems to be getting into place.
I still feel weird. We set the date and yet I am thinking we should wait to see if in 2 months how much we make between us and budget wise.
Also I wondered if waiting would be a sacrifice to God to show Him He comes first before my fiance and marriage, It would be painful and all and thus a sacrifice. I feel at peace either way. I asked for forgiveness of sins and trying hard to repent and I just dunno what to do. Can you help sort this out for me?
