Hi all
I am wondering if you can give me some advice on what I should do. Basically, I am feeling extremely despondent about my current church and am questioning whether I should continue attending my current church or if I should consider another Church.
What has basically led up to this is the following.
My church was a mission established church in my country and used to be extremely passionate, community outgoing and just "felt filled with the Spirit" if you get my meaning.
However, that pastor eventually left back to his country, and a new local pastor took over the church.
The first issue that bugged me was the way he approached a member of the congregation. We were having a study at his home when a member called in tears saying her teen daughter was throwing a tantrum and locked herself in her room. This member begged the pastor in tears if he could speak to her daughter, even over the phone, to calm her down. The pastor point blank refused, said he will not get involved, and told her to call the police if she wanted help with her daughter.
If the teen has a history of this, i can see him responding this way.
if the church is pretty big, i can see that he wouldn't be able to be available for every
little tantrum. Not to be rude, but those pastors could really be running here and there
for their people if they didn't have strong boundaries.
the next issue hit much closer to home. I am a single male who lives by himself. My family live hundreds of miles away in other cities so I am really on my own. One day, I had to go into the hospital for an emergency gall bladder removal. I was scared and felt completely alone, so phoned my pastor to ask if he cant maybe come over to the hospital for an hour or so just to keep me company and pray for me. His response? Sorry, too busy, he cant come over but good luck. Not once during my stay did I hear from him (or any other member of the congregation for that matter). That was the time I truly felt totally alone. Even after returning home, during my recovery period I desperately needed help for transport, buying food and even just day to day activities for cooking, as it was extremely risky I could tear my stitches and get infection if I over exerted myself. I asked for help from the congregation and pastor. the response? Sorry.....too busy...cant help. can understand some people can't, but not even 1 person tried to help me even for a day or something? I think that was the moment my passion for church well and truly died. A Christian family? During the one time I needed them, they basically told me to get lost. Btw I did find someone to help me, from a friend who does not attend my church.
So sorry! I know that feeling.
Horrible when you reach out, out of need and desperation, only to be left alone to suffer.
But with God, it turns into a blessing.
When we really have to TOTALLY depend on Him, things get real !
Definitely a growing/pruning situation.
(Sometimes I think He doesn't want a human to pick up the other end of the line...maybe not, that's just me musing)
This then led to me to stop going to Church for a couple of weeks. I got one call from Pastor and Deacon who asked where I was. I explained and said I just need some time to clear my head and then I will come back. Then the next thing, I got a letter in the post informing me that my membership to the church was cancelled because I was not attending.
wow
(in case you were wondering, I was very active in my church, leading bible studies, volunteered at holiday bible club, was a deacon for a year, on the music team etc. But this was mostly when the old pastor was still around; under this pastor most of these things such as my Bible study etc have been cancelled by him as he wants to lead everything himself or says there is no money to hold such an activity, etc).
I am so angry and depressed, I don't even know if I want to attend any church anymore. What I have picked up is that churches are populated by hypocrites, all saintly on the outside when a passionate pastor is in charge but when you do need them they show their true colours. I just feel so desperately alone now and I am now at the stage where my faith is floundering and my whole outlook on Christianity is very bleak
Is there any advice anyone can give me? Am I over reacting to how I feel about my Church's reaction to my situation? I am so lost
Hi T7
all i can give is my own thoughts.
Bible says "Is any one of you afflicted? Let him pray".
(I know it says a lot of other things, but bear with me)
God alone is your savior. Sometimes, when this happens,
it really is HIM stretching us, pruning off the old junk so
new fresh growth can move in!
My advice is to pray and fast and seek God's face.
Why try to make such a decision based on your partial
understanding, when your FAther, who sees all , who
judges hearts, can direct you and give you insight!
Don't be like me though, and wait for some big
neon light! Listen .. listen starting right this second.
Did He gently nudge you earlier about some little thing?
Just DO it.. It's the beginning of that life you've dreamt of!
God has a rich life for you. Repent, cry out to God
keep crying out to God. Seek Him.. with ALL of
your heart. Press in! Keep pressing in. Maybe every
day for a week,,, maybe two.. maybe it will only take
a couple days. But press in and don't stop until He
moves. Like Jacob with the ladder to Heaven story?
Sell everything and purchase that field. Forget about
pastor and church folks and where to go and such for
a season. Rest and rejoice in Him. Let Him love you
as only the Father can! Let Him demonstrate how
much He loves you.
To get you going tomorrow morning: