Seeks gods advice through you

[Anon103]

Been Married a Longtime. Husband and I have been through owning our own place to renting then his inheriting the family home.

During this time husband has had affairs. I have forgiven. (circumstances at the time or so I thought were to blame), namely my working long hours as the family bread winner.

Now he has returned to his hometown. I hate it here. I carn’t work. Not that I don’t want to work. Only people have to die or move away before any good jobs are giving up. Those that retire usually put their children relatives or spouses up for the jobs.

Anyway I am now a housewife. A full figure one. Why, because when I was younger that’s who my husband went off with. So I figured if he likes ‘em big!!! Now he treats me as a “Sack of Potatoes.”

I am basically now a household druigg. I wash cook clean all day and that’s all I do. I cannot remember the last time he actually took me out. Unless you count shopping for DIY stuff (which was last week. Because I’m the one who takes the measurement and orders the goods).

Even for Valentines, Mother’s day etc I am usually with my own family (Parents and siblings and their families), as he will be working or does not want to come.

I have found we have been arguing since I got here about a certain female. Whenever I bring the name up he is immediately on the Defensive he sticks up for her. But if others get onto me. He reckons he does not need to because I can take care of myself.

He’s done this so much, our son who has moved home for a bit follows his lead. So now I have two of them constantly criticising and getting on at me. But I notice they do not take over and do what I do to show me where I am going wrong. Or when I ask them to do things they take nearly a week before they get around to it. But I am supposed to do everything like yesterday.

The other day hubby actually said for all your qualifications look where you are now!!! I am not happy. Am I being unreasonable, here? This woman he defends is about 20 years younger than me. Maybe more. I am approaching retirement age. I don’t feel threatened by her as I consider her as a kid hell she is not much older than my own child. But this attitude of his is beginning to wear thin. And I get the impression (even though he denies it), that its designed to make me pack my bags and leave.

 

[Another Lazarus]

Forgive your husband and i pray to Jesus may He comfort you and give the best to your life and may your husband repents.

 

[Sarah G van G]

I am sorry to read your post, you must be very unhappy. Whilst I believe that forgiveness is very important I am not too sure you can go on the way you are. It sounds like you are well qualified and could support yourself financially if you were to move (alone) to an area where there is work for you.

I don't think there is anything wrong with being a housewife but it doesn't sound like it is enough for you at all. I am not suggesting divorce at all but living apart so that you can work and have your self-esteem (which your husband seems set on destroying?!). I do not speak for God and I am (probably?) not being led by the Holy Spirit to advise you. I am writing this with the righteous anger of a married woman who has experienced men behaving badly my whole life. Thus out of sisterly solidarity I say that if he wants you to pack your bags and leave, do it. Buy yourself some clothes and get a nice haircut first though, you will have interviews to go to!