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... marriage is not a right we are entitled to but a privilege we must earn.
Too many stumble their way into marriage, making mistakes all along the way to the altar, and then continue to make a mess of things after they've tied the knot.
If a particular level of personal development must be achieved before God grants us a spouse, I haven't seen it.
Although I think we should strive to become better versions of ourselves, bringing positive qualities to our relationships, meeting such standards in no way guarantees that we'll find a wife or a husband.
It increases the odds that we'll have a good marriage should we happen to find someone compatible, but it doesn't bring that person into our life. Arguably, it might even help us avoid wrong relationships, perhaps resulting in prolonged singleness.
If people can trust God for practically everything in their lives as far as a job, house/apartment, car, and a whole list of other perks and necessities, then why not a spouse?
You don't "need" perks and it is good and necessary to trust God, that also means trusting Him if His answer is "no, that is not something you need." You should be trusting God to provide a fulfilling life that serves Him,, with or without a spouse. Not everyone gets married or is even happy after they get married. You trust God to provide within HIS WILL, not your desires. That does not mean you can't ask for a spouse if you desire one but don't make it the end all of end alls.
Most people aren’t called to singleness. The challenges some face in finding a companion doesn’t alter the reality of His plan.
People marry everyday. Saved and unsaved. I don’t believe a defeatist attitude benefits anyone or will attract a suitor.
While there is nothing wrong with desiring a spouse, there is something wrong with finding your life a failure if you don't ever get married.
There is a way to look at this where never marrying could be seen as a failure. Suppose you avoid marriage out of fear when you were designed for it. You suppress your drive and avoid the opposite gender. You are in a sense, hiding from your calling. People certainly do it. It could be seen as a failure in that regard
What is the defeatist attitude? That some of us won't get married (or get married again)?
But I don’t believe in burying yourself in a room over the possibility you’ll never marry. Nor smothering your desire for a spouse because you’ve come up short.
I do believe in getting up and looking forward to what each day will bring and spending your time to improve your life and those around you.
What I don't believe in is spending much time even thinking about dreaming about how your life would be improved with a spouse and potentially not making decisions because you are hoping a spouse will enter into the picture. (This is likely not how you, LaBella, see life but many do).
At the risk of sounding pseudo-spiritual to a lot of people, I will say this: I don't believe God uses the word, "no" in his vocabulary a lot. However, this only applies to believers who walk in step with His Spirit continually. Look, I know the Word of God. And His promises are yes and amen in Christ. The scripture also gives the promise that if we abide in Him we can ask Him for whatever we want and it will be given to us. This isn't blab it grab it theology. To put it this way, if we're in deep communion with the Lord, the thought of asking anything against His will will not even cross our minds. This goes back to the promise that if we delight ourselves in Him then He will give us the desires of our hearts. For a small minority, this means they won't marry but will stay in that solo fellowship with God only. I know this type of faith will rub some folks wrong, but I would encourage them to really study the Word and pray about what I'm saying here. Alas, the biggest issues we face as followers of Jesus is not getting told no, but "wait". And I will be the first to admit, that's hard to do sometimes.You can trust God to provide what you need. However, that may not be the mansion you want but rather a room in someone else's small apartment. They both meet the need of "shelter". You don't "need" perks and it is good and necessary to trust God, that also means trusting Him if His answer is "no, that is not something you need." You should be trusting God to provide a fulfilling life that serves Him,, with or without a spouse. Not everyone gets married or is even happy after they get married. You trust God to provide within HIS WILL, not your desires. That does not mean you can't ask for a spouse if you desire one but don't make it the end all of end alls.
I find it discouraging for people to encourage with false hopes that end in disappointment.
Two of the biggest mistakes Christians make today are having a small view of God and a minimalist attitude of what He can do for them if they totally give themselves over to Him.
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