School and marriage issues?

[NettersDeal]

I have been attending college and working on my internship in Human Services. I plan on becoming a Christian counselor. The stress of trying to maintain a marriage and a good relationship with you spouse, a relationship with God, and trying to study, sleep and work is very hard. Is there anyone else who has had to deal with this out there?

My husband and I are getting depressed because we never see each other. I am finding it difficult to weight Christian principles against Psychology and the beliefs that go along with that. Let alone trying to find time to clean my house, do laundry, or any of the other 50 things that I need to do. How do you deal with this stress without destroying your marriage and your other relationships?

It doesn't help either that I am fighting MS and Fibromyalgia, and my husband is fighting Epilepsy so things are even more difficult in terms of the rest that I need. Any advice out there?

 

[JeremiahJ]

You know, there really isn't advice that's going to make everything better. My best advice is to prioritize, and make sure your priorities are rightly aligned. Keep your focus on Jesus Christ, understand what He cares about, and let that be what you care about most too. Your life should reflect what's important to you. Make sure that you are spending time with God and seeking His guidance on what is important, asking Him to help you with your stress, psychology-Christianity coalescing issues, marriage, prioritizing, and the like. Find peace in God. Know that He will not give you more than you can handle and maintain a life that is not anxiety-ridden and a healthy growing marriage. If it is more than you can handle, then something that is not of eternal value must be cut out. I'll sum my mini-ramble here: Prioritize your life based upon the priorities of God.

 

[Syrup6]

My husband and I are just about to do what you're talking about... going back to school to do marriage and family counseling. I know it's going to be hard, but remember where you were at when you were where I'm at... with the passion of the bigger picture... of God's call for your life. Anyone who is called to counsel marriages I believe will have more than their fair share of problems... as a matter of relating. I know it doesn't help things much now, but sit down with your husband and open the lines of communication back up. We notice that it becomes harder and harder to keep the lines open as we become absorbed in our lives of doing this and that. YOU MUST take the time to slow down and relax. We just did that yesterday after too long without it and it was like swimming in a cool lake on a hot day. Amazing God bless you as you pursue eachother and God in this. IM me if you want to talk more or need a friend or something.
Tracy

 

[Solitaire]

One thing I wish I would have been doing throughout my undergrad. (i have one semester left!) is not to be so hard on myself and get perfect grades on everything. The stress I caused myself was ridiculous, and it all added up until I got a panic attack the week after finals in May.

This is very good advice. I am studying and married, and so was my SIL (just finished!). One thing we found is that you cannot be a perfectionist. Sometimes you just have to do your best and accept a slightly less than perfect grade. It makes life so much better, because you have time for "family time" as well as all of the mundane things around the house.

Also, consider taking a lighter course load. I have dropped one subject this past semester so that I am no longer trying to do these things full time, and it has made a huge difference.

Good luck!