I've been recovered from anorexia/bulimia/compulsive eating for 7 years. I'd been in the middle of one or more of these from the ages of 11-33, and was in various types of treatment. If I can be of any help, please let me know. Recovery is possible!!!
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recovered eating disordered person
- Thread starter pediNurse
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Auntie
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Congratulations, pediNurse.
Your recovery and positive witness gives hope to all. God bless you for starting this thread, and welcome to Christian Forums.
I used to have a good friend who was bulimic, and she was also an ER nurse. We lost touch over the years, and I sometimes wonder what happened to her.
I used to have a really bazaar eating disorder, but it was anxiety based, and not related to anorexia or bulimia.
Your recovery and positive witness gives hope to all. God bless you for starting this thread, and welcome to Christian Forums.I used to have a good friend who was bulimic, and she was also an ER nurse. We lost touch over the years, and I sometimes wonder what happened to her.
I used to have a really bazaar eating disorder, but it was anxiety based, and not related to anorexia or bulimia.
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urbanfaerie:
don't give up hope babe it is possible. I got an assignment for ya Study what God thinks and says about you in the bible etc.
You are beautiful God made ya in his image, perfect. He doesn't make mistakes. He loves you so much. He hurts to see you hurting. Please don't give up, he won't give up on you. he died because he loves u
don't give up hope babe it is possible. I got an assignment for ya Study what God thinks and says about you in the bible etc.
You are beautiful God made ya in his image, perfect. He doesn't make mistakes. He loves you so much. He hurts to see you hurting. Please don't give up, he won't give up on you. he died because he loves u
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Well done for getting better, but at the moment I don't see anyway out of this for me. I've tried and failed again and again, I've prayed for so long that I will be free of this but I can't get rid of it. I'm trapped, I'm sinking, it's pulling me down and I don't have the will to fight it anymore.
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Here's one of the things that helped me-
The body is the temple of the Holy Spirit- it's not really mine, sort of a 'rental'!!!! So, it's my job to take care of it , so I can return it in good condition one day. If a neighbor asked me to watch their house while I was on vacation, and water the plants, and feed the cat- I'd want to do a really good job, and be sure that when they came home, things were how they left them....if I'd do that for a neighbor's house/plants/cat, how can i not do my best to take care of what God has given me????? It didn't all happen at once- it was a slow process, but dying was a real possibility, and how was I gonna stand before God, and explain what I was doing there at such a young age, because of what I'd done to myself???? YOU CAN GET BETTER- if you're willing to do anything, and willing to face the ups and downs, you can recover. With God, ALL things are possible......I'd been and ED wreck from the ages of 11-33..... that was 2/3 of my life at that point. And I got better.... spent time in looney bins, treatment centers, groups, and individual therapy- but until I wanted to get well, and was willing to go to God 
, it wasn't going to happen. We have to humble ourselves before Him, and ask Him to show us what He wants us to see...and be what He wants us to be.....life is SOOOOOO much better with out starving/bingeing/purging.....I wasted so much time and energy on worthless pursuits. PM me if you want to talk!!!
The body is the temple of the Holy Spirit- it's not really mine, sort of a 'rental'!!!!
So, it's my job to take care of it , so I can return it in good condition one day. If a neighbor asked me to watch their house while I was on vacation, and water the plants, and feed the cat- I'd want to do a really good job, and be sure that when they came home, things were how they left them....if I'd do that for a neighbor's house/plants/cat, how can i not do my best to take care of what God has given me????? It didn't all happen at once- it was a slow process, but dying was a real possibility, and how was I gonna stand before God, and explain what I was doing there at such a young age, because of what I'd done to myself???? YOU CAN GET BETTER- if you're willing to do anything, and willing to face the ups and downs, you can recover. With God, ALL things are possible......I'd been and ED wreck from the ages of 11-33..... that was 2/3 of my life at that point. And I got better.... spent time in looney bins, treatment centers, groups, and individual therapy- but until I wanted to get well, and was willing to go to God , it wasn't going to happen. We have to humble ourselves before Him, and ask Him to show us what He wants us to see...and be what He wants us to be.....life is SOOOOOO much better with out starving/bingeing/purging.....I wasted so much time and energy on worthless pursuits. PM me if you want to talk!!!
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ukok
Freaked out, insecure, neurotic and Emotional
i am so pleased for you that you have been able to work through this problem. You are quite right, our bodies are on rental from God and it is a waste of time and energy allowing one's life to revolve around ones dietry habits. Still.....old habits are hard to break.
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While prayer is certainly important, you also have to DO something- even if it's something little- little steps still get you somewhere...it's doing nothing that keeps you stuck. And, you have to get out of your own head.... something that helped me was a gratitude journal... at first I listed things like "my socks match", but pretty soon, I had a list of over 200 things, and those things lead to being thankful for other things, and that stuff showed me that I could pray for OTHERS, etc..... Nothing on this planet is all about us.... there's a much bigger picture out there. Eating disorders keep the focus on ME- not HIM, or someone else who is hurting. Even if you can only put off bingeing/purging/starving for a few minutes longer each day, you're still DOING something. Being a 'victim' is a choice- YES- a choice..... it's all about attitude, and being willing to do whatever it takes to get past something. The past is OVER, so that excuse doesn't fly (I could tell some stories about my past, but bottom line is SO WHAT- it's over- how do I choose to live TODAY???). Ya gotta get out of your own head, and look for things outside yourself.
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J
Jet Black
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congratulations , I really hope that you can help others. I think that eating disorders are a real tragedy, and anything that can help you overcome them is a good thing.
LittleMissShy... I know it is hard, though I have never been there, but please do not give in to despair, Please look for the strength to get you through this, whether it is a strength from inside, or somewhere else. My wishes are with you.
, I really hope that you can help others. I think that eating disorders are a real tragedy, and anything that can help you overcome them is a good thing.LittleMissShy... I know it is hard, though I have never been there, but please do not give in to despair, Please look for the strength to get you through this, whether it is a strength from inside, or somewhere else. My wishes are with you.
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To those who think they can't get well-
YOU are the only one who can give up on your recovery. If you decide it's hopeless, and that you're a 'victim', then you're right, you probably won't get better- BUT, if you truly want to get well, and are willing to do whatever it takes AND SEEK GOD'S purpose for your life, you can be renewed beyond all expectations
. I didn't recover myself. I talked to God. Many nights, I'd ask Him to just let me wake up the next day....and to show me what i needed to learn. And He did. Eating disorders are such 'self' diseases, and as long as you turn to 'self', you will stay sick, and will probably die from the disorders. That is so unnecessary and sad- and what a way to go- from something you could choose to change..... I KNOW- it doesn't feel like you have choices- I remember those days very well- but WHO DOES if you don't???? The choices and decisions don't have to be major ones- you can start out with very tiny changes, and it still 'counts' as progress!!! Rome wasn't built in a day, and you didn't get messed up with this overnight!!! But not doing anything is really suicide. YOU CAN DO IT!!!! If I can turn 22 years around, with being told I'd be dead in 'x' months I don't know how many times, YOU CAN GET WELL!!!! God doesn't want us so wrapped up in such trivial matters as weight and food.... He wants us to seek Him and to turn to Him. If you're still breathing, you have choices!!!!
YOU are the only one who can give up on your recovery. If you decide it's hopeless, and that you're a 'victim', then you're right, you probably won't get better- BUT, if you truly want to get well, and are willing to do whatever it takes AND SEEK GOD'S purpose for your life, you can be renewed beyond all expectations
. I didn't recover myself. I talked to God. Many nights, I'd ask Him to just let me wake up the next day....and to show me what i needed to learn. And He did. Eating disorders are such 'self' diseases, and as long as you turn to 'self', you will stay sick, and will probably die from the disorders. That is so unnecessary and sad- and what a way to go- from something you could choose to change..... I KNOW- it doesn't feel like you have choices- I remember those days very well- but WHO DOES if you don't???? The choices and decisions don't have to be major ones- you can start out with very tiny changes, and it still 'counts' as progress!!! Rome wasn't built in a day, and you didn't get messed up with this overnight!!! But not doing anything is really suicide. YOU CAN DO IT!!!! If I can turn 22 years around, with being told I'd be dead in 'x' months I don't know how many times, YOU CAN GET WELL!!!! God doesn't want us so wrapped up in such trivial matters as weight and food.... He wants us to seek Him and to turn to Him. If you're still breathing, you have choices!!!!
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I know recovery is possible. So keep going if you are struggling. Sometimes the last thing you want to do is keep going but its all you can do, keep going and rely upon God. Be broken before him and he WILL build you up again.
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i won't speak for anyone else, but...
maybe you're right in some way. half of me IS holding on. but the other half sees something, and wants to smash the mirror into a million pieces. scream. crawl into my room and never come out. everytime i decide to try to get a better, i fall flat on my face, worse off than before. and yeah, i did pray. and for a while, it was working. but then all this other stuff hit me, and now i'm here.
again, maybe that's just me.
*****
and while all that sounds great -- the pray for others, focus on Him, and so on -- it just doesn't do it for everyone. people can tell me that i look pretty, but what do i care? i don't care if people find me attractive. if what i see in the mirror doesn't please me, i won't be happy. i'm the one who has to get ready in the morning. people's opinion about me aren't trustworthy, especially when their focus is on making me "better".
and right now, my relationship with God pretty...low. and i don't want to add my whole life's story to explain why...but i'm just trying to have a relationship that isn't forced. i feel like my whole life has been spent, trying to work for His affection. legalism. all the while, my heart was...dead. it wasn't cold. it just felt nothing. anyways...yeah. sorry if i sound like a horrible person, but i don't mean to be.
maybe you're right in some way. half of me IS holding on. but the other half sees something, and wants to smash the mirror into a million pieces. scream. crawl into my room and never come out. everytime i decide to try to get a better, i fall flat on my face, worse off than before. and yeah, i did pray. and for a while, it was working. but then all this other stuff hit me, and now i'm here.
again, maybe that's just me.
*****
and while all that sounds great -- the pray for others, focus on Him, and so on -- it just doesn't do it for everyone. people can tell me that i look pretty, but what do i care? i don't care if people find me attractive. if what i see in the mirror doesn't please me, i won't be happy. i'm the one who has to get ready in the morning. people's opinion about me aren't trustworthy, especially when their focus is on making me "better".
and right now, my relationship with God pretty...low. and i don't want to add my whole life's story to explain why...but i'm just trying to have a relationship that isn't forced. i feel like my whole life has been spent, trying to work for His affection. legalism. all the while, my heart was...dead. it wasn't cold. it just felt nothing. anyways...yeah. sorry if i sound like a horrible person, but i don't mean to be.
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Hey blueiverson -- you don't sound like a horrible person. You sound like a hurting person
and I felt sad when I read your post and sad when I found myself nodding right along with it because I understand it so well.
I just felt bad that you thought you may come across as horrible - you didn't. It's a constant struggle and so hard to kick. I've hurt a lot of people in the process of falling in and out of my ed - none on purpose but it hardly matters when you're hurting people around you because of your actions.
Personally I have a really hard time feeling like the ed isn't a massive sin. I have huge issues with the idea of being selfish and I think an ed is a huge form of selfishness, in a way. It is hard to 'give it up to God' when so many things would have to change. "But you're so unhappy now" one might say - "why wouldn't you want things to change?" Ah, but it's the comfort and 'safety'
of the status quo, no matter how destructive.
I appreciate pediNurse very much in the support she has offered to me in the past and to others w/ this post - those who suffer from eds really need someone who understands to come alongside them since so many people can't possibly understand unless they've been there.
Ooohh I am so with ya there. I know that my eating disorder has a lot to do with my shying away from God for as long as I have. (3 years?!?)blueiverson said:
I just felt bad that you thought you may come across as horrible - you didn't. It's a constant struggle and so hard to kick. I've hurt a lot of people in the process of falling in and out of my ed - none on purpose but it hardly matters when you're hurting people around you because of your actions.
Personally I have a really hard time feeling like the ed isn't a massive sin. I have huge issues with the idea of being selfish and I think an ed is a huge form of selfishness, in a way. It is hard to 'give it up to God' when so many things would have to change. "But you're so unhappy now" one might say - "why wouldn't you want things to change?" Ah, but it's the comfort and 'safety'
I appreciate pediNurse very much in the support she has offered to me in the past and to others w/ this post - those who suffer from eds really need someone who understands to come alongside them since so many people can't possibly understand unless they've been there.
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pediNurse, that is so awesome that you overcame your ED, i'm sure it's probably the hardest thing you've ever had to do. I'm in recovery right now for bulimia and have been for a few years. It's tough to keep trying when i relapse and it seems as if i'll never get over this terrible disease. prayer has helped me a lot and i rely on it to get me through some of my days.
blueiverson, i've been where you are now, when it seems impossible to live your life any other way. it's so easy to just keep up with the disorders ways and forget about recovery all together. I'll pray for you to find the incredible amount of courage it takes to over come the most difficult part of recovery.
blueiverson, i've been where you are now, when it seems impossible to live your life any other way. it's so easy to just keep up with the disorders ways and forget about recovery all together. I'll pray for you to find the incredible amount of courage it takes to over come the most difficult part of recovery.
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