question regarding an eloquent spouse.

[DrenchedInHisBlood]

Is any guy here married to a lady with eloquent speech? For those who are, let me ask, is that a big deal to you? I mean, someone who not only speaks complex sentences very thoroughly but also knows how to use smart vocabularies quickly on the spot. I am asking because I had lately been seeing a sister in Christ who i like so much, and she's really eloquent and has pretty good vocabulary and to me it is such an attractive thing. If we do end up being together for life, her speech will be a continual attention grabber to me. So I wanna see if there is any guy here who also takes such attribute seriously if you're married to a female who is like that.

And vice versa I ask the same to you married women

 

[JaneFW]

My husband can talk for Texas! Seriously. He just loves to talk and is very knowledgeable on a variety of issues, because he is interested in almost everything that he sees. He doesn't just scratch the surface, he gets beneath it and does the research, so he's always interesting.

Just one question: does she know when to stop? Sometimes, it can get old when someone doesn't know when to stop and enjoy the silence. So long as she can do both, she sounds like a lot of fun!

 

[Luther073082]

Is any guy here married to a lady with eloquent speech? For those who are, let me ask, is that a big deal to you? I mean, someone who not only speaks complex sentences very thoroughly but also knows how to use smart vocabularies quickly on the spot. I am asking because I had lately been seeing a sister in Christ who i like so much, and she's really eloquent and has pretty good vocabulary and to me it is such an attractive thing. If we do end up being together for life, her speech will be a continual attention grabber to me. So I wanna see if there is any guy here who also takes such attribute seriously if you're married to a female who is like that.

And vice versa I ask the same to you married women

It sounds to me like you are attracted to this woman partially becuase she is intelligent or at least seems that way. Thats a good thing.

Diplomatic or eloquent speech has its place and its good in public. And around people that you don't know you probably want to use that because you come off as intelligent. (You are not going to get ahead if everyone you meet thinks you are a moron.)

However that being said, there is a time, especially around people that you know very well to dump that kind of speech.

My wife and I in private often speek to eachother using a vocabulary and manner of speech that is well below our respective intelligence levels and abilities. And we'll often say things in a childlike manner.

 

[citizenthom]

I'm the more eloquent one in my marriage (I have to be; it's kind of my job), and my wife enjoys it. But it does have its pitfalls when we're trying to work through an argument, because if I "wax poetic" it gives me an unfair upper hand in her eyes. This is especially true if we're having a heated disagreement, because when she gets angry her verbal skills are the first thing to go, whereas my anger is extremely cerebral. I have to be purposefully conscious of these things: I listen a lot more than I talk, and when I do talk I try to talk more about my emotions than about facts and arguments.

Basically the more eloquent person has to be willing to A.) let his/her guard down (like Luther described), and B.) be extremely purposeful about not using it as a weapon.

 

[JanniGirl]

My husband has repeatedly mentioned that my vocabulary and antiquated way of speaking is very attractive to him.

Of course, I've also been told by him and others, that "nobody talks that way." -- I guess I am who I am. He says it lovingly, though. We often joke about the fact that due to our different upbringing (location, location, location) that we pronounce words differently, with different inflections, etc. -- I guess we're geeks to be so tickled by these differences.

There is often great beauty in the written and spoken word.

 

[Romanseight2005]

It is my job to expand the vocabulary of others. To me, all vocabulary is about communication. So if the words will help me be more specific, or if the words will help me to paint a clearer picture in some way, then I will use them. However, if the words will confuse the people that I am speaking to, then there is no point in using them.

 

[Conservativation]

I think vocabulary and eloquence are different things. not to mention vocabulary lends faux to eloquence, pseudo eloquence, just listen to our current president to hear a decent vocabulary, and a vacuum where eloquence should be, and a decidedly IN-eloquent populace so easily impressed by "2 dollar words" and toast masters inflection tricks.

 

[highlife]

I'm the more eloquent one in my marriage (I have to be; it's kind of my job), and my wife enjoys it. But it does have its pitfalls when we're trying to work through an argument, because if I "wax poetic" it gives me an unfair upper hand in her eyes. This is especially true if we're having a heated disagreement, because when she gets angry her verbal skills are the first thing to go, whereas my anger is extremely cerebral. I have to be purposefully conscious of these things: I listen a lot more than I talk, and when I do talk I try to talk more about my emotions than about facts and arguments.

Basically the more eloquent person has to be willing to A.) let his/her guard down (like Luther described), and B.) be extremely purposeful about not using it as a weapon.

I can use big words too and I know when someone is being condesending (although my grammer is not all that), I will cut off the relationship. Using big words or complex throughts can not win arguements because usually the issue that most people are arguing over is actually very simple and your using big words and complex thoughts in an attempt to manipulate the other person.

 

[moonkitty]

I can use big words too and I know when someone is being condesending (although my grammer is not all that), I will cut off the relationship. Using big words or complex throughts can not win arguements because usually the issue that most people are arguing over is actually very simple and your using big words and complex thoughts in an attempt to manipulate the other person.

My husband does that, and it drives me nuts. We are both college educated and both of us has excellent vocabularies. But when we disagree I like to get to the heart of the matter and put it simply, but he will attack my position grammaticality and it drives me bonkers.

 

[citizenthom]

My husband does that, and it drives me nuts. We are both college educated and both of us has excellent vocabularies. But when we disagree I like to get to the heart of the matter and put it simply, but he will attack my position grammaticality and it drives me bonkers.

That's what I have to avoid doing with my wife. It takes a lot of effort sometimes, too, since it's what I do all day at work. You just have to remember that your spouse is not your enemy. "Don't fight to win," as they say.

 

[moonkitty]

That's what I have to avoid doing with my wife. It takes a lot of effort sometimes, too, since it's what I do all day at work. You just have to remember that your spouse is not your enemy. "Don't fight to win," as they say.

Oh, he fights to win. I think he missed his calling, he should have been a lawyer.

 

[If Not For Grace]

My husband can talk for Texas!

so can mine-but he's just a good ole boy who likes to yap (even though he has a speech impediment & most folks look at him like he's crazy) Talks to every sales clerk, person behind or in front of him in line-used to drive me nuts. You can look at it 2 ways (hot air or warm breeze). He loves people which is part of why I love Him.

 

[WeCryOut]

My husband and I are both huge English geeks. It can be great, his speech is something I find highly attractive about him. Unlike our physical appearances, our vocabulary and communication skills will only improve as we age.

I am considerably more outspoken, and probably a little better at debate than my husband. However, my husband is literally a genius and while it's intimidating sometimes it's also incredibly sexy. As shallow as it is, I have never been attracted to men who were of average intelligence or lower. It's not that I dislike people who aren't well-spoken, I am just not attracted to men who can't hold their own in an intellectual conversation. I know my husband is attracted to me for similar reasons, although I am far from genius IQ.

 

[Romanseight2005]

My husband and I are both huge English geeks. It can be great, his speech is something I find highly attractive about him. Unlike our physical appearances, our vocabulary and communication skills will only improve as we age.

I am considerably more outspoken, and probably a little better at debate than my husband. However, my husband is literally a genius and while it's intimidating sometimes it's also incredibly sexy. As shallow as it is, I have never been attracted to men who were of average intelligence or lower. It's not that I dislike people who aren't well-spoken, I am just not attracted to men who can't hold their own in an intellectual conversation. I know my husband is attracted to me for similar reasons, although I am far from genius IQ.

I agree.

 

[twob4me]

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