Question about Adultery

How long you have to wait is your's and your husband's problem to work out. Again, you can't go dumping him and running off because it doesn't suit your lifestyle and you want to go jumping in someone else's bed. The Bible forbids it and there are no valid arguments in favor.

SirKenin said:

And how you achieve that peace is to leave the man and remain single. Not remarry. You can't use that line as an excuse to sin and get away with it.

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Better yet, we can stay married and just flirt with someone other than our spouse

babyangel said:

Oh ok should I rush out and call him tonight, and invite him back so he can keep abusing me? I am not dumping him. I asked him to leave to straighten up, instead of straightening up he has kept on his ways and apparently wants to divorce me. What have I done wrong in that scenerio, am I wrong because I cant sleep with him or live with him? Where in the bible does it say I can not protect myself? And whose bed do I want to jump into. If divorced I would probably remain single for awhile anyways. But I need some scriptural back up here, all I have been hearing is the repeat of man made rules, not biblical.

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Good point babyangel. Sometimes people fail to use common sense. If God is against murder (one of the 10 commandments), then God would surely hate physical abuse. That's a "no brainer." So, be rest assured that you are doing the right thing. God favors godly marriages, not ungodly marriages.

Grishnak said:

Better yet, we can stay married and just flirt with someone other than our spouse

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LOL!! Thank you Grishnak for bringing a chuckle to my day. I needed the laugh. It's been a rough day for me. Humor keeps all of us sane sometimes.

seebs said:

What if you left and remarried before becoming Christian? I am here, today, with vows made in good faith to stand by someone as a husband, 'til death do us part. I reject any theological speculation which says I should break those vows.

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Ah, ignore these people seebs.

Remarriage at worst is apostatizing oneself from a marriage covenant.
Big whip-de-do if it was a situation where someone was being abused everyday of their marriage.

If Jesus can let David slide for breaking the law by eating forbidden bread when he was hungry, Im quite sure He can forgive us over our mistakes or having to leave a spouse for abuse then remarrying.

God knows the heart.

He knows mistakes are made and repented for.
He doesnt expect you to make yet another mistake 10 years down the road by ditching out on yet another spouse for no reason.

SirKenin said:

There's always the option of leaving the man until he gets help and then go back. It's not like you don't have choices. You just opted not to use them because they didn't suit your lifestyle or make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

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Its not like you dont have a choice not to flirt with women youre not commited to, either.
You do it of your own free will.
We are to treat our ladies with honor and coheirs in Christ.
I just dont see Peter being married and flirting with Priscilla

Grishnak said:

Better yet, we can stay married and just flirt with someone other than our spouse

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Flirting=being friendly, giving a hug or kiss, complimenting them. Hitting on them=making sexual passes. First is ok and the second one is not.

hehe

Personally I won't date tightwads or insecure control freaks. If they find that to complain about or try to control you because they're too frail to stand on their own two legs they'll always find something else. They aren't worth my wasted time.

heartnsoul said:

Good point babyangel. Sometimes people fail to use common sense. If God is against murder (one of the 10 commandments), then God would surely hate physical abuse. That's a "no brainer." So, be rest assured that you are doing the right thing. God favors godly marriages, not ungodly marriages.

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Problem is that some are so stuck in those 4 verses they use, that they have neglected the rest of scripture.

Id much rather face a merciful God for havnig to leave a abusive man, then remarrying a good one, than worry about sirkenin and his advice and go rushing back to be beaten some more.

SirKenin said:

Flirting=being friendly, giving a hug or kiss, complimenting them. Hitting on them=making sexual passes. First is ok and the second one is not.

hehe

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And its not these ladies fault that you have confined your scriptural knowledge to those 3 or 4 passages that you use.

Im not dumb enough to think that repetitive flirting is not testing sexual waters

babyangel said:

Thanks Although Sirkenin is the attitude that alot of churches follow I can understand that. But for me I need biblical proof of that. Sirkenin is one who is being quick to say no divorce/remarriage ever but no backup. I can not just accept one scripture to be the be all and end all of divorce. I have given much scriptural back up as to why I feel the I do.

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The problem is that one cannot take a passage here and another there and even hope to have the truth.

In Mathew Jesus is dealing with a problem of divorce ''for any cause'', divorces that would still be legal, but were unfounded.

Moses had permitted the Jews to interpret Deut 24:1 very loosely, it seems and they men were casting out their wives over all sorts of silly issues.

Whats funny is, Deut 24 was to protect the woman from a corrupt husband.
I dont thing sirkenin even cares to bother to know that.

Moses wanted to make sure these clownballs couldnt just toss the wife out leaving her destitute, just becuase they were tired of her.
She needed to be provided proof that she was no longer married to them, so she could possibly find someone else to marry.


All one has to do is actaully READ Matthew and see what the conversation is about.

Its not about the differences in the words ''divorce'' and ''put away'', either.

The Pharisees were asking Jesus if Moses was permitting them to divorce ''for ANY cause" (bad breath, stinky feet, oily hair, etc)

Jesus said it was becuse of their hardness of heart that Moses had done this.
A man didnt want her anymore over her stinky breath or whatever and would just send her packing.
Moses demanded PROOF so she could be remarried if need be.
Moses was protecting the wife in that he was just allowing the man to send her with her divorce papers so the husband wouldnt start mistreating her or actaully Kill her so hed be free to remarry.


Jesus responds a a fantastic way in that He doesnt do away with divorce, He just makes it much harder for the Jewish men to cast out a wife.
Jesus says ''no more can you cast her out for stinky breath, etc...she must break the marriage coventant before you can do so and then either of you remarry"

Whats really funny is that these people who are going so overboard on this passage should go all the way.
Jesus is speaking to the men, women from what I understand werent even permitted to file a divorce at all.
They had to have permissoin from the husband.

As usual, there is always more to the story than what 4 verses presents.

Repetitive flirting means absolutely nothing.

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Keep your CF account open for a few years.

If you marry your current ladyfriend at some point, and continue flirting after, Id really like to know the outcome of your marriage say in 5 years

Deuteronomic Law does not apply to us, so you can not quote it to make your case Grishnak. That is precisely where your argument falls apart, voiding the rest of your presentation. Jesus gave us a new act to follow, and he was very VERY specific in his wording about divorce. He even said "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that any man that divorces his wife except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery".

"...And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery"

Grishnak said:

Keep your CF account open for a few years.

If you marry your current ladyfriend at some point, and continue flirting after, Id really like to know the outcome of your marriage say in 5 years

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I have flirted all my life because it is my very nature. I have well over 80 female friends and I'm still going strong. I have several women that are eager to date me. Several more that would like other things. I never have any problems getting a girlfriend. They act quickly so they don't get beat to the punch and have even stated as much. My current girlfriend is flirty just like me and NONE of my relationships disolved for flirting nor was it EVER brought up as a problem.

Soo. You were saying?

SirKenin said:

Deuteronomic Law does not apply to us, so you can not quote it to make your case Grishnak. That is precisely where your argument falls apart, voiding the rest of your presentation. Jesus gave us a new act to follow, and he was very VERY specific in his wording about divorce. He even said "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that any man that divorces his wife except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery".

"...And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery"

Jesus VOIDED the very Law you are trying to preach, so you are preaching nothing but an outright lie.

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You are a funny little man.

As I said, SK, just keep jabbering out those 4 verses you know by heart now.
Im quite sure youll be content with what little truth youve found.


Jesus admitted that the pharisees had followed the law. But then told them that they had neglected the weightier issues such as justice and mercy.

I dont think you even know the law, but Ill grant you that one.
I am convinced, however, that you too neglect the weightier matters of justice and mercy.

All true the OT God demanded sacrifice.
But you know, we come to Hosea and its funny, God didnt want sacrifce at all.

Hos 6:6 For I desire mercy, and not sacrifice; and the knowledge of God more than burnt offerings.

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He would have prefered mercy and knowledge of Himself for us.

NO offense, but people like you are the reason we had to sacrifce, in part, as you dont offer what God really wanted....mercy.

You only offer what the pharisees did... hard, cold law.

SirKenin said:

I have flirted all my life because it is my very nature.

I have well over 80 female friends and I'm still going strong.

I have several women that are eager to date me.

Several more that would like other things.

I never have any problems getting a girlfriend.

They act quickly so they don't get beat to the punch and have even stated as much.

My current girlfriend is flirty just like me and NONE of my relationships disolved for flirting nor was it EVER brought up as a problem.

Soo. You were saying?

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Now pretend I wrote this post and tell me whats very wrong here

It doesn't just come from me Grishnak, it comes from the most well known sources in the world so I hate to say it but you're looking kind of silly to me right now because I know better.

Jesus HATED divorce. He wiped out this Deuteronomic Law you're so proud of because it was being abused, just like you preach people to abuse it in this forum. He eradicated it and put a new Law in place. One you are counciling people NOT to follow because you think you're so smart and you know better.

We are called to live in peace, but that means only one of two things. If the unbeliever leaves, let him and remarry. If you are leaving for any other reason than adultery, stay single. That's it. That's how we live in peace. We don't dance around it justifying our actions in the name of "mercy" or "sacrifice" or any of these other ridiculous terms you're throwing around that don't apply. You're taking something entirely out of context in Hosea and then pretending you know what you're talking about. It's a joke.

Showing mercy on someone or making a sacrifice for God does not mean counciling them to violate Jesus and Paul's teachings or ditching your husband for any old reason and jumping on another man. That's defrauding them and being a false witness. Not showing mercy.