Punishment from GOd

[Habiibii]

Questions to you all:

Does God punish us for our sinfulness?

Does God keep certain blessings & desires from us as a result of not walking with Him they way we should... or should I say...living a worldly life as opposed walking with HIM?

Background:
I am 41 & accepted Christ as a young girl. I turned my back on Him, so to speak, in college and all through my 20's & half of my 30's. Here and there I would come back to Him just for a while... bascially when I got really down and felt the need for Him. When I began to feel better it was off on my own again. I came back to Christ around age 36. And now, here I am at 41 years and still single. (never wanted to get married in my 20's & early 30's, by the way...) No Christian mate in sight and can pretty much kiss off ever having any children.
I realize some people are blessed with the gift of singleness. This, however, is a gift that I do not desire. There is a desire in my heart to be married. If it is in my heart then God must have put it there. So, what I have been trying to figure out for the longest time is ... Is God punishing me for turning my back on him for so long? Is he not giving me the desires of my heart because I did not follow Him for so long? I have discussed this with a few friends (some who know Christ and some who don't) and all of them say that God doesn't work like that. But the Bible clearly tells of Him punishing His children for certain deeds. So I do feel as though I am being punished and feeling depressed because I fel I soooo deserve it. Am I looking at this completey wrong??? This has been on my mind for years now. I would really love to see what some of you have to say. Especially, posters who are 30 years or older. Certainly, no offense to younger posters... God Bless You. I guess I am wondering what people with a bit more life experience would say to this.

Thanks!!

 

[tapero]

Questions to you all:

Does God punish us for our sinfulness?

Does God keep certain blessings & desires from us as a result of not walking with Him they way we should... or should I say...living a worldly life as opposed walking with HIM?

Background:
I am 41 & accepted Christ as a young girl. I turned my back on Him, so to speak, in college and all through my 20's & half of my 30's. Here and there I would come back to Him just for a while... bascially when I got really down and felt the need for Him. When I began to feel better it was off on my own again. I came back to Christ around age 36. And now, here I am at 41 years and still single. (never wanted to get married in my 20's & early 30's, by the way...) No Christian mate in sight and can pretty much kiss off ever having any children.
I realize some people are blessed with the gift of singleness. This, however, is a gift that I do not desire. There is a desire in my heart to be married. If it is in my heart then God must have put it there. So, what I have been trying to figure out for the longest time is ... Is God punishing me for turning my back on him for so long? Is he not giving me the desires of my heart because I did not follow Him for so long? I have discussed this with a few friends (some who know Christ and some who don't) and all of them say that God doesn't work like that. But the Bible clearly tells of Him punishing His children for certain deeds. So I do feel as though I am being punished and feeling depressed because I fel I soooo deserve it. Am I looking at this completey wrong??? This has been on my mind for years now. I would really love to see what some of you have to say. Especially, posters who are 30 years or older. Certainly, no offense to younger posters... God Bless You. I guess I am wondering what people with a bit more life experience would say to this.

Thanks!!

God does not punish us. He gently corrects us called chastising in the nt in the niv version. That is correction like you would recieve from a loving healthy father. There is no punishment from God in the nt. If you find a verse let me know.

If we were all punished when we sinned we couldn't last a second. Even the non-christian is not punished.

The secret is..there is a reaping to all we sow. God set this in motion, and even then we see people do bad things and not reap bad things.

I don't believe that God withholds blessings from us, but because of our walk blessings are not recieved because we are not walking in the light. There is a consequence to all our actions, though we may not experience them now, or maybe never. But sin always has a consequence. We may not recognize the consequence.

When I don't read the word, I suffer loss. Is God not blessing me? No it's not that God is not blessing me, it's because I am not being blessed by being immersed in the truth.

There are many Christians who suffer poverty, illness, persecution, etc. It is not because they have done something wrong. It is the result of the curse on the world, a result of sin from Genesis. Please keep in mind Job who did nothing wrong and suffered greatly.

I hope that helped some.

God bless you,
Tapero

 

[UnitynLove]

God does not punish us. He gently corrects us called chastising in the nt in the niv version. That is correction like you would recieve from a loving healthy father. There is no punishment from God in the nt. If you find a verse let me know.

If we were all punished when we sinned we couldn't last a second. Even the non-christian is not punished.

The secret is..there is a reaping to all we sow. God set this in motion, and even then we see people do bad things and not reap bad things.

I don't believe that God withholds blessings from us, but because of our walk blessings are not recieved because we are not walking in the light. There is a consequence to all our actions, though we may not experience them now, or maybe never. But sin always has a consequence. We may not recognize the consequence.

When I don't read the word, I suffer loss. Is God not blessing me? No it's not that God is not blessing me, it's because I am not being blessed by being immersed in the truth.

There are many Christians who suffer poverty, illness, persecution, etc. It is not because they have done something wrong. It is the result of the curse on the world, a result of sin from Genesis. Please keep in mind Job who did nothing wrong and suffered greatly.

I hope that helped some.

God bless you,
Tapero

Rightly said!

 

[Jeshu]

Questions to you all:

Does God punish us for our sinfulness?

Does God keep certain blessings & desires from us as a result of not walking with Him they way we should... or should I say...living a worldly life as opposed walking with HIM?

Background:
I am 41 & accepted Christ as a young girl. I turned my back on Him, so to speak, in college and all through my 20's & half of my 30's. Here and there I would come back to Him just for a while... bascially when I got really down and felt the need for Him. When I began to feel better it was off on my own again. I came back to Christ around age 36. And now, here I am at 41 years and still single. (never wanted to get married in my 20's & early 30's, by the way...) No Christian mate in sight and can pretty much kiss off ever having any children.
I realize some people are blessed with the gift of singleness. This, however, is a gift that I do not desire. There is a desire in my heart to be married. If it is in my heart then God must have put it there. So, what I have been trying to figure out for the longest time is ... Is God punishing me for turning my back on him for so long? Is he not giving me the desires of my heart because I did not follow Him for so long? I have discussed this with a few friends (some who know Christ and some who don't) and all of them say that God doesn't work like that. But the Bible clearly tells of Him punishing His children for certain deeds. So I do feel as though I am being punished and feeling depressed because I fel I soooo deserve it. Am I looking at this completey wrong??? This has been on my mind for years now. I would really love to see what some of you have to say. Especially, posters who are 30 years or older. Certainly, no offense to younger posters... God Bless You. I guess I am wondering what people with a bit more life experience would say to this.

Thanks!!

If you feel guilty and unforgiven than it can easy seem that God is punishing you for your misdeeds.
Faith in God however has no such fears, forgiven means no guilt (any longer) and no inner misery. Rom 8:1 says it all, strife for that.

 

[jsimms615]

Questions to you all:

Does God punish us for our sinfulness?

Does God keep certain blessings & desires from us as a result of not walking with Him they way we should... or should I say...living a worldly life as opposed walking with HIM?

Background:
I am 41 & accepted Christ as a young girl. I turned my back on Him, so to speak, in college and all through my 20's & half of my 30's. Here and there I would come back to Him just for a while... bascially when I got really down and felt the need for Him. When I began to feel better it was off on my own again. I came back to Christ around age 36. And now, here I am at 41 years and still single. (never wanted to get married in my 20's & early 30's, by the way...) No Christian mate in sight and can pretty much kiss off ever having any children.
I realize some people are blessed with the gift of singleness. This, however, is a gift that I do not desire. There is a desire in my heart to be married. If it is in my heart then God must have put it there. So, what I have been trying to figure out for the longest time is ... Is God punishing me for turning my back on him for so long? Is he not giving me the desires of my heart because I did not follow Him for so long? I have discussed this with a few friends (some who know Christ and some who don't) and all of them say that God doesn't work like that. But the Bible clearly tells of Him punishing His children for certain deeds. So I do feel as though I am being punished and feeling depressed because I fel I soooo deserve it. Am I looking at this completey wrong??? This has been on my mind for years now. I would really love to see what some of you have to say. Especially, posters who are 30 years or older. Certainly, no offense to younger posters... God Bless You. I guess I am wondering what people with a bit more life experience would say to this.

Thanks!!

I think there is a big difference between punishment and discipline. I do believe that God sometimes disciplines us for our best. Punishment seems to suggest that there is no redemptive quality to it. When God disciplines us it is to help us to grow closer to him and to teach us, not just for vengence.
I don't know if that is your situation or not. Look at Hebrews 12:4-11 for further reference.
God bless. Don't just settle on someon just so you can get married by the way.

 

[Habiibii]

Tapero, Unitynlove, Jeshu and Jsimms615,

Thank you so much for you thoughtful responses. I have read each of them and will post my thoughts.

Tapero, so much of what you wrote is what I know in my head and in my heart. I believe that when I start to feel down about my situation it is because I am listening to the lies that the enemy is telling me. I know this is the case. You are so right about reading the Bible and immersing oneself in God's word. That is indeed something that I have slacked off with during the past several months. When I am not reading the word, I definitely notice a change in myself, my outlook on life and my attitude towards myself and others. So why do I slack off on this? I suppose it's called laziness and putting other things on the forefront, which should not be. So, in this sense, I am not allowing myself to be blessed by the Lord because I am not making the choice to immerse myself in Him.

You mentioned that many times we see people do bad things and they are not punished. Or, what I notice notice a lot is that so many people seem to reap wonderful benefits in life yet they do not know the Lord at all. I guess I look at this and wonder why? Why are these people blessed with some things that I so desire in my life when I know that they are about as far away from the Lord as one can get. Granted, it is not for me to judge what is in someone else's heart. I know that it is also not for me to question why God gives something to one person and not to another. Yet, it is the human part of me that does ask why.

Tapero, you also mentioned the fact that God chastises (gently corrects) us as opposed to punishing us and mentioned the NT. I guess I always think of God's punishments in the OT. Now, as we all know, different denominations tend to focus on different things within the Bible. I had never really heard of the reference of the old law and the new law growing up. I only really heard of this while attending an AOG church while living overseas. Are you referring to this when you mention that there is no punishment in the NT? Why should I not consider the punishment in the OT? Is this because in the NT, Christ died for our sins? There was punishment in the OT so are you saying that because Christ died for our sins in the NT that He no longer punishes? I have never really understood this. I know he forgives us but I still thought that we receive punishment for our sinful actions. Can you elaborate?

Jeshu, you mention that if one feels guilty and unforgiven then it may seem as though God is handing out punishment. Maybe that is part of my problem. I do feel guilty for many thigns I have done in my past. I know in my head that God is a forgiving God but I guess much of the problem is that I can not easily forgive myself for certain things. You may be wondering what could this person have done in this world that is so bad. Well, one thing is that when I was 19 I had an abortion. Here I am, now, at 41 with no children. As horrible as it is to know that I will likely never be a mother, I feel that I don't deserve to be a mother. I had my chance and did what I did. It is very difficult to forgive myself for this. I feel that not blessing me with a child is punishment for the abortion I had many years ago. How can I have no inner misery regarding this even though I know that God has fogiven me?

Jsimms615, I read Hebrews 12:4-11. God disciplines us for our good. I guess I am just wondering, if I am indeed being disciplined, how long will this discipline endure? For so many years when I was not walking with the Lord, I dated non-Christians and wasted so much time. I don't want to waste anymore time. I have always tried to look at it like this... it took me many years to get back right with God... about 17 years, in fact... so I figure that God waited a very long time for me to come back to Him... so now it is my turn to worship and love Him and wait on Him to fulfill the desires of my heart. I suppose I am simply tired of waiting but it no one's fault but my own.

By the way, you sweetly warned me not to settle on someone just to get married. Thanks for the reminder. I don't think that is something that I would ever do. I did have the opportunity to get married once, by the way. I dated a man from Brazil for over four years. He did not know Christ and I was not walking with the Lord at the time. However, I know God never left me and I know to this day that it was His gentle voice telling me not to marry this man that kept me from doing so. He was very intelligent (a doctor), handsome and a lot of fun. But I knew in my heart that, although I was not walking with the Lord at the time, that I would one day be back with Him. Therefore, I knew I could not marry this person. Kind of like that old saying... there's a kind of girl you date (in my case, a man) and a kind you marry. I was having fun with the kind "you date" but not the kind "you marry". I did love this person, but I think God sort of helped that love to dissipate so that I could, inevitably, break up with him. This relationship ended in 1998 and there has been no one in my life since. I have become quite lonely.

Interestingly, while visiting an old girlfriend in NYC earlier this month I met her brother-in-law. She has sinced called me and asked if she could give him my phone number. I told her no and explained why. He is very nice but Hindi. I have been friends with this girl since college and she understood and was not offended as her husband is Hindi also. I told her that as flattered as I was from his interest, I could no longer date anyone who did not share my faith in Christ.

Overall, I guess I just need to remember Hebrews 11:1..." Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" NIV.

Thank you for reading this BOOK! God Bless you all.

 

[Gentle]

It doesn't sound like a God to me and those kind of thoughts are no good for a person. It's a delusion than can keep you from feeling or seeing God. You aren't being punished, things 'just are' good or bad and why do you make 41 sound as if it's old or something? You are probably accusing yourself, guilt is useless as we already know when we mess up and can fix it or not.
With depression these are the last ideas you want in your mind, God is pure love and we all know that deep inside.
bless you and don't punish yourself, just live
there could be billions of reasons you aren't married but doesn't mean you won't be nor would it make you happy b/c it's not really the problem
judge yourself on all the good things you have done in life and remember God see's that too
peace
Gentle

 

[tapero]

Hi, Habiibii,

I'll write you in pm, because depression is not really for theological discussions only because it could lead to debate. And I want to explain the answers to your great question.

Love
tapero

 

[Bay]

Uh I think He waits to punish as He see's fit on judgement day.Just a thought.We punish ourselves.

 

[bumpkin1]

I agree with all of your good inputs. I personally have seen my Father correct me, and I know I needed it. I have also seen satin tell me lies. I didn't know the difference at the time, but now I do.

 

[JohnLocke]

Habiibii,

I'd be careful to ascribe to God, really anything at all, particularly if you feel depressed. If you want, we can go 'round with the theological stuff, but, if you'll forgive, I'm drawn to a more secular approach.

My question would be, are you attracted to anyone? It's a serious question, because it may mean, as much as I hate to say it, the reason you're not married is you simply haven't met anyone compatible. That's okay. It's a big decision, to promises your life and worldly goods to a joint enterprise with another until death (even if you believe in civil divorce, which I heartily do). Another aspect could be, if you're not attracted to anyone, at all, that it is a symptom of a mental disease such as depression or generalized anxiety, and there are ways to help with that.

If you're just bummed that you haven't found the right person, I'd suggest networking, attending parties, meeting more and new people. Eventually, you should find at least someone who is interesting to have coffee with. And, as in all things, small steps, small expectations. In my experience if you concentrate too much on huge goals that are of necessity a long way in the future, it doesn't go so well.

And as my good buddy used to say, "The root of all sorrow is attachment. Detach yourself from the ends of your actions and you will know peace."

Cheers!