Prayer please

[krunk79]

Hey guys, I could use some prayer for guidance and encouragement if ya'll can spare the time.

My wife is pushing for divorce (read my profile) and not giving God, me, our pastor, or our counselor an opprotunity to even talk about why she's upset, let alone work things out.

The counselor told me last week that she is unwilling to try to work things out and refused to schedual another appointment for herself. The wife did not tell me herself, and did not communicate with me at all until today. Today she sent me an email stating that I need to send her a list of joint property that I want so that she "can get this over with" (keep in mind she never even told me she's filing). God has done a mighty work in my life the past few months, and I do not desire divorce at all, nor does He. However, I realize that if I allow things to get hostile and angry (i.e. being a jerk and fighting her every step of the way and thumping a bible in the court room) that there will be zero chance of reconciliation. I live in NV also, so she will get her divorce no matter what I do. I believe that God wants me to act in a kind and loving way, even in the midst of all the hostility.

Please pray that God will soften her heart and perform a miracle. Please pray that He guides me and comforts me in this heartbreaking time.

Thank you

 

[desi]

Hey guys, I could use some prayer for guidance and encouragement if ya'll can spare the time.

My wife is pushing for divorce (read my profile) and not giving God, me, our pastor, or our counselor an opprotunity to even talk about why she's upset, let alone work things out.

The counselor told me last week that she is unwilling to try to work things out and refused to schedual another appointment for herself. The wife did not tell me herself, and did not communicate with me at all until today. Today she sent me an email stating that I need to send her a list of joint property that I want so that she "can get this over with" (keep in mind she never even told me she's filing). God has done a mighty work in my life the past few months, and I do not desire divorce at all, nor does He. However, I realize that if I allow things to get hostile and angry (i.e. being a jerk and fighting her every step of the way and thumping a bible in the court room) that there will be zero chance of reconciliation. I live in NV also, so she will get her divorce no matter what I do. I believe that God wants me to act in a kind and loving way, even in the midst of all the hostility.

Please pray that God will soften her heart and perform a miracle. Please pray that He guides me and comforts me in this heartbreaking time.

Thank you

So if you stand up and defy her errant ways God will never fix your marriage? This is starting to sound like an old joke with divorce as the punch line.

 

[krunk79]

Desi,

God is in complete and total control of my life, and if He so leads me to make a spectacle of myself in court, I will. However, He has led me to be compassionate and loving, even in the midst of hostility from her, and fighting tooth and nail would only justify things in her eyes and harden her heart even further than it already is hardened. I find it offensive that you butt your nose into my business (and fluffy_rainbow's advise) with a critical and belittling attitude instead of with a compassionate and prayerful attitude (the point of my post WAS asking for prayer for guidance from GOD, after all). Matthew 7:9-10 comes to mind when reading your reply.

If you do not wish to pray for me and my situation, as I requested, that is fine with me. But I ask that you not be critical of a situation you know precious little about. I do not need to defend the path that God has told me to take and the attitude toward my wife He has told me to maintain. I came to this site looking for prayer and support--not hostility.

 

[desi]

Desi,

God is in complete and total control of my life, and if He so leads me to make a spectacle of myself in court, I will. However, He has led me to be compassionate and loving, even in the midst of hostility from her, and fighting tooth and nail would only justify things in her eyes and harden her heart even further than it already is hardened. I find it offensive that you butt your nose into my business (and fluffy_rainbow's advise) with a critical and belittling attitude instead of with a compassionate and prayerful attitude (the point of my post WAS asking for prayer for guidance from GOD, after all). Matthew 7:9-10 comes to mind when reading your reply.

If you do not wish to pray for me and my situation, as I requested, that is fine with me. But I ask that you not be critical of a situation you know precious little about. I do not need to defend the path that God has told me to take and the attitude toward my wife He has told me to maintain. I came to this site looking for prayer and support--not hostility.

Then don't be hostile with people who disagree with you. If all you want is people to tell you what you want to hear so be it.

 

[heartnsoul]

I will keep you and your wife in my prayers. I am sorry to hear you are going through a divorce. You have a good attitude and I hope you will continue to draw closer to God through these tough times. May God lift you up and give your wife wisdom and peace. Know that even if divorce happens, God will still be present in your life and your wife's life. God never gives up on us even if we choose to give up on Him. God is faithful and loves you both. In every bad situation, there are always lessons to be learned. If you can learn the lesson(s) well, it will make it all worthwhile. It sounds like you have come to terms with everything and have already "let go and let God" work. Good for you! God will help you move on with your life. Keep God close to your heart and He will take care of you. God bless you.

 

[MERCY@GRACE]

Welcome Krunk I am sorry to hear your wife's not budging. Is there someone else in the picture? I will be praying God's will

 

[krunk79]

Thank you everyone for your prayers! I want what God wants, so prayer is the most powerful thing I can do right now.

As for someone else being in the picture, it seems quite probable, but I am afraid to investigate. The results could only hurt me, and it doesn't seem to really matter. If that IS the case, and if she allowed God to get ahold of her, I know that He could work in both of us and get us through that (even though I would have biblical grounds at that point, I would allow God to restore our relationship). However, if it is the case, and she turns her back to God and our relationship, I'm probably better off not knowing.

 

[jenelis]

krunk79, sounds like you are hurting. I prat that God will heal your hurt and bring you peace irrespective of the deicisions your wife makes. And welcome to CF!

 

[Southern Cross]

As for someone else being in the picture, it seems quite probable, but I am afraid to investigate. The results could only hurt me, and it doesn't seem to really matter.

Krunk,

I am sorry you're going through this. You are doing the right thing by drawing closer to God. God can do miraculous things with someone's heart, but they at least have to be willing to let Him in.

I really think you SHOULD KNOW if someone else is involved. Like any battle, you have to know what you are up against. It's a battle for your marriage and for your wife. Often, exposing an affair will be enough to make the souse involved with another person rethink their choices. I can speak from personal experience in this - and from speaking to others who have dealt with it too. I don't know what your particular situation is, but at least knowing the facts can help you deal with it and to mold your actions, thoughts and prayer life around appropriate topics. Does that make sense?

I sincerely hope she's not involved with someone, or looking for the freedom to get involved with anyone else. Just dig a little deeper, that's all it takes to find out.

 

[jenelis]

krunk79--

Just be sure you can handle what you find out if you opt to investigate.

And remember, krunk and others who are going through similar situations, that God teaches us through each and every twist and turn of our lives. It's ALWAYS sad to see a marriage disintegrate, but you have to search for the lesson that's there to learn or its all in vain.

I think I can say this because I am a woman-- but we woman tend to hold issues inside so that by the time you men are let in on the fact that "we" want a divorce-- "we" are already past the point where "we" would be willing to work to fix the situation. And to reason with a woman in this situation is an arduous task! Plan wisely!

As I've said, you'll be in my prayers as well as others who are gonig through similar situations.

"Be strong in the Lord, put on the full armour of God."

 

[krunk79]

Thank you all so much for your prayer and support!

You've given me a lot to think and pray about. So far I have not felt God leading me to do any investigating, but if that is what needs to be done, I will do it when I feel God telling me its the right time. Right now I don't know if I can handle the results of an investigation. I will certainly reflect and pray about this issue.

Again, thank you for all the prayers--I can use all that I can get!

 

[MoeJangles]

Brother, I know your pain, I too am going through this. My wife has left me for another man, just a few weeks ago. I will pray for you.

 

[Yitzchak]

I have been where you are. I will pray for you. It is a hard thing to accept , but one truth is that you have to allow your wife to make her own decisions even about this sort of thing. I will pray that she changes her mind about it. You are right though in saying that you should not pressure her about it in any way.