Today i viewed pornography on my computer again. I feel empty and depressed. Why do i keep doing it? In the end i get no pleasure from it. I just can't seem to stay away from it. I've been an idiot during my short time here. I might quit this forum. I just can't seem to find God or Christ like others can. I'm in a hell of my own making.
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Porn addiction
- Thread starter Elgibbor
- Start date
Dianna_Child of God
He is my All in All
It is hard when we are addicted to something like that. Do you have a Pastor or someone that you talk to for counseling? Don't leave. It is not easy to start a relationship with the Lord, just don't give up on that.
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You might want to check out Shiloh place website...specifically Jack Frost.
He has tapes and books on his own porn addiction and how , for him , it was rooted in a breach within himself from being a boy, where he craved affection from his mother, who wasn't healthy in her relating, she was alcoholic, leaned on him emotionally...not his dad...
I heard once that if a male child is leaned on heavily emotionally by his mother, this is not fair because the child is not grown emotionally yet. It is too much. It puts teh child in a position of coping...not safe....brings on a need for comfort.
Also, I learned in a counselling course once that when a woman opens up emotionally to a man, it tends to open him up physically . It's a kind of men and women difference thing.
Jack Frost is a preacher who had real painful emotional abuse from his alcoholic mum and his perfectionistic father.....and all he wanted as a kid was her love and her to be there and to comfort him and make it safe.
Jack frost makes the point about his own addiction to pornography -as a little boys need for his mothers love ...now looking anywhere and everywhere to get what he can't find a solution for, because the mum still wont play ball.
He has real revelation on God as Father and also as Mother to your heart.
Please don't think I am suggesting anything he has been through automatically means you are too...addictions can be for many reasons.
Just wanted to share about Mr Frost because I really rate the work God does, of healing through His Father Heart and Healing the Orphan Spirit encounters.
Maybe have a look...see if there's anything there for you.
One thing I will say , about my own struggles with my own sins....whatever sin i struggle with...is proof that I don't really know God in teh way I truly need to.
Only He can fill the need.
Sometimes finding out what the true need is ...can be half the battle.
If a person has had problems with their earthly dad...then they will feel fear and struggle to relate to God...they w ill turn to their old security blankets, how they coped....cos that is how they had to do it..it is familiar.
so sort of safe in a strange way.
but its not ..as you say...helping.
it makes you empty and not joyful and truly alive.
God sees your heart really wanting things to be the right way.
He loves your heart.
Jesus has got what you need...and you may have to understand yourself and the belif you hold about God...which may well have things transfered from your earthly parental expereinces....
Your sins are covered by the blood. God is not focussing on yoru sin. He is focussing on you.
Who needs real love and acceptance...who needs to really be able to be loved as you are , warts and all....
Who needs to have space to learn and grow and feel that you having a learning process is not somehow forbidden and that God is expecting perfection.
God sent Jesus and it was His perfection that stepped in for you on the cross...so that you would never have to be perfect ...or worry about it.
His perfection is His gift to you. All you need to do is belive in Him and receive His perfection as a free gift.
Then your sins are forgiven and there is a loving Father , wanting to teach you His love and acceptance...with no conditions.
Get under the blood my friend and simple honesty is sufficient.
God needs to reveal Himself to you...and He knows how to..and He will spell it out so you , with your way of seeing and tastes and evertthing...he will reach you in a way you can relate to.
He loves you so much.
and He wants to to know it. Its His job to show you.
and you seem so hungry to find Him.
Check out that website...see if there's any gold for you there .
Godbless you
Loved
He has tapes and books on his own porn addiction and how , for him , it was rooted in a breach within himself from being a boy, where he craved affection from his mother, who wasn't healthy in her relating, she was alcoholic, leaned on him emotionally...not his dad...
I heard once that if a male child is leaned on heavily emotionally by his mother, this is not fair because the child is not grown emotionally yet. It is too much. It puts teh child in a position of coping...not safe....brings on a need for comfort.
Also, I learned in a counselling course once that when a woman opens up emotionally to a man, it tends to open him up physically . It's a kind of men and women difference thing.
Jack Frost is a preacher who had real painful emotional abuse from his alcoholic mum and his perfectionistic father.....and all he wanted as a kid was her love and her to be there and to comfort him and make it safe.
Jack frost makes the point about his own addiction to pornography -as a little boys need for his mothers love ...now looking anywhere and everywhere to get what he can't find a solution for, because the mum still wont play ball.
He has real revelation on God as Father and also as Mother to your heart.
Please don't think I am suggesting anything he has been through automatically means you are too...addictions can be for many reasons.
Just wanted to share about Mr Frost because I really rate the work God does, of healing through His Father Heart and Healing the Orphan Spirit encounters.
Maybe have a look...see if there's anything there for you.
One thing I will say , about my own struggles with my own sins....whatever sin i struggle with...is proof that I don't really know God in teh way I truly need to.
Only He can fill the need.
Sometimes finding out what the true need is ...can be half the battle.
If a person has had problems with their earthly dad...then they will feel fear and struggle to relate to God...they w ill turn to their old security blankets, how they coped....cos that is how they had to do it..it is familiar.
so sort of safe in a strange way.
but its not ..as you say...helping.
it makes you empty and not joyful and truly alive.
God sees your heart really wanting things to be the right way.
He loves your heart.
Jesus has got what you need...and you may have to understand yourself and the belif you hold about God...which may well have things transfered from your earthly parental expereinces....
Your sins are covered by the blood. God is not focussing on yoru sin. He is focussing on you.
Who needs real love and acceptance...who needs to really be able to be loved as you are , warts and all....
Who needs to have space to learn and grow and feel that you having a learning process is not somehow forbidden and that God is expecting perfection.
God sent Jesus and it was His perfection that stepped in for you on the cross...so that you would never have to be perfect ...or worry about it.
His perfection is His gift to you. All you need to do is belive in Him and receive His perfection as a free gift.
Then your sins are forgiven and there is a loving Father , wanting to teach you His love and acceptance...with no conditions.
Get under the blood my friend and simple honesty is sufficient.
God needs to reveal Himself to you...and He knows how to..and He will spell it out so you , with your way of seeing and tastes and evertthing...he will reach you in a way you can relate to.
He loves you so much.
and He wants to to know it. Its His job to show you.
and you seem so hungry to find Him.
Check out that website...see if there's any gold for you there .
Godbless you
Loved
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I will add this too.
Try doing this before you go to the computer. If you get the urge to do it again...just make yourself take a piece of paper, before you go to the computer, as write down these words
I need to feel...
write it out 5 times and each time without thinking too much...just write what you need to feel.
write it dont judge it
You might not want to carry on to teh computer..or you may want to still.
it's immaterial really. The blood of Christ handles all your failures, past present future. You can have peace if you agree with God and agree with His mind that sin was dealt with...it's love that matter now, and being known and getting to know.
teh main thing is , you are listening to yourself. You are wanting to listen to the unheard 'you' underneath that can only express through a 'language ' of pornography.
Just be allowed to say 5 things you need to feel, one at a time. then put it away.
each time , do the same thing.
you may be 'sinning' but you are also now allowing 'new' 'love' in.
Love for your true self...that needs to be heard and listened to and taken seriously..not left out and hiding under an addiction.
I speak from my own experience of addiction.
you may then want to explore these feelings with a counselor or pastor, someone that you have taken the time to sound out , that you trust.
Blessings
Try doing this before you go to the computer. If you get the urge to do it again...just make yourself take a piece of paper, before you go to the computer, as write down these words
I need to feel...
write it out 5 times and each time without thinking too much...just write what you need to feel.
write it dont judge it
You might not want to carry on to teh computer..or you may want to still.
it's immaterial really. The blood of Christ handles all your failures, past present future. You can have peace if you agree with God and agree with His mind that sin was dealt with...it's love that matter now, and being known and getting to know.
teh main thing is , you are listening to yourself. You are wanting to listen to the unheard 'you' underneath that can only express through a 'language ' of pornography.
Just be allowed to say 5 things you need to feel, one at a time. then put it away.
each time , do the same thing.
you may be 'sinning' but you are also now allowing 'new' 'love' in.
Love for your true self...that needs to be heard and listened to and taken seriously..not left out and hiding under an addiction.
I speak from my own experience of addiction.
you may then want to explore these feelings with a counselor or pastor, someone that you have taken the time to sound out , that you trust.
Blessings
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miss-a
Newbie
Many wonderful loving things have already been said here. The only thing I want to add is that no one else here is any better than you. We struggle with faith, all of us. Even the great prophets in the Bible struggled to believe at times. The Bible says that the things we struggle with are "common to man." That means many people battle what you battle. You do not have to carry the burden that says you not as good at this as others are. We all have something we battle. Please don't put that heavy weight on yourself. The battle belongs to the Lord. We have a role to play in it, but ultimately He is the Healer. He will heal you. It is usually a journey, sometimes a long one, but He will finish what He started, if we will keep coming back to Him.
Don't leave the forum. Jesus is here. Loving people who will share with you and pray for you are here. We want to help.
Prayers for you,
a
Don't leave the forum. Jesus is here. Loving people who will share with you and pray for you are here. We want to help.
Prayers for you,
a
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Victorium
Well-Known Member
Drakkar don't leave as you can get support here from Christians going through the same things as you. Christ is there it's just this sin is condemning you and putting up a wall between you and God. When you conquer this thing - and you will - and the further away you get from it the closer you will come to God (James 4:7-10). There is a section on this forum for pornography addiction and I think you have to ask the chaplain on how to post there. Also ask the chaplain for help on this matter as he is qualified in this area. Furthermore like any addiction prayer will help you to overcome. Pray always about this! Ask God for forgiveness and to cleanse you of unrighteousness also learn to forgive yourself. Don't give up you can beat this thing! If you fall just keep getting up.
Open a thread here to ask the chaplain about your problems: Ask a Chaplain - Christian Forums
I found this for you that may encourage you, read here: How can I overcome an addiction to internet porn? Can addiction to pornography be defeated?
My prayers are with you. Keep in contact with us and let us know how you are going?
Open a thread here to ask the chaplain about your problems: Ask a Chaplain - Christian Forums
I found this for you that may encourage you, read here: How can I overcome an addiction to internet porn? Can addiction to pornography be defeated?
My prayers are with you. Keep in contact with us and let us know how you are going?
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Praying for you, brother.
The important thing is not that you fall, but that you get up again
Don't give up.
The important thing is not that you fall, but that you get up again
Don't give up.
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Dianna_Child of God
He is my All in All
Praying for you, brother.
The important thing is not that you fall, but that you get up again
Don't give up.
Totally agree!
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Thanks for all your posts and advice, everyone. I know my journey out of the darkness and into the light will be a long and hard one, but for the first time in a long time i am feeling hopeful. I said a small prayer last night for the first time in years and felt better for it. I won't be leaving the forum after all, thanks to the kindness i have recieved i feel able to stay here now.
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M
Mr. Runningfish
Guest
I was going to PM, instead of post, but since you're being brave, open and sharing, I guess I will too. Hang in there, keep praying. For me, it took over 10+ years to break my addiction, but with His help, I was able too. And it's certainly not easy. BUT- once you start breaking it, it does become easier. I don't always win out against it, but He'll definitely be your rock if you choose to lean on Him. That's the hard part. When you feel that dark urge, visit this forum, read through some posts, open up a bible (virtual or physical). It'll be hard at first (oh, but you know that already) but it is doable.
I've never heard of Jack Frost, but he sounds like someone who has some great advice.
My prayers are with you tonight DraKKar.
I've never heard of Jack Frost, but he sounds like someone who has some great advice.
My prayers are with you tonight DraKKar.
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I've been doing well over the last couple of days, but last night and today i have struggled. Not with the porn, i haven't had the desire to view any, but in trying to find Jesus. I keep thinking of things i read in 'The God Delusion' and on Atheist websites that are making me have doubts again. Surely science has proved many things in the Bible to be false? Hasn't it? I'm feeling very down now.
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Winter
Jesus, let it be ok
Read books by Lee Strobel.
He was a hard core atheist who set out to prove that God didn't exist. He started his research on this ---- he was the last person in the world you could ever convince that God existed --- and while he was on his research journey to disprove God, he actually found proof - logical proof - of God. He instantly became Christian because through his studies in anthropology, linguistics, history, even philosophy and psychology, he found that the existance of Christ did indeed (and still does) exist. He uses logic and reason - perspectives used by atheists - to make his claim on the existance of Christ.
Read his books if there is ever any doubt.
He was a hard core atheist who set out to prove that God didn't exist. He started his research on this ---- he was the last person in the world you could ever convince that God existed --- and while he was on his research journey to disprove God, he actually found proof - logical proof - of God. He instantly became Christian because through his studies in anthropology, linguistics, history, even philosophy and psychology, he found that the existance of Christ did indeed (and still does) exist. He uses logic and reason - perspectives used by atheists - to make his claim on the existance of Christ.
Read his books if there is ever any doubt.
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Dianna_Child of God
He is my All in All
I just watched the movie he did. He spent 2 years of research trying to prove Christ wasn't real, that it was all fake. At the end he said it would take more faith for him to still be an atheist than it was to follow the Lord. Very powerful movie, I want to read the book too.
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Victorium
Well-Known Member
DraKKar,
You won't find Jesus on an Atheist website. Read the New Testament books of: Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. Pray to God with an open heart. Ask God to show you who Jesus is. Ask God to open your eyes and show you truth. We can't save ourselves as everything comes from God, our faith comes from God and it is through his words and faith in Jesus Christ that our lives and minds are transformed, being born again as new people, freed from sin and all doubt will disappear. This is the power of the Gospel to save!
Of course those atheists will find fault in the Bible because their minds are already made up before they read it. Their hearts are hardened to the point that they can't see truth, they are the one's that are in fact deluded by their own egos and pride, they hide behind this facade and this has made them blind to God and become ignorant to the facts of their own lives. Yes, they are intelligent and have intellect and come up with some compelling arguments, but these answers can never fill in the emptiness in their hearts which only God's love can do. Jesus had to deal with such people in his day and they nailed him to the cross for speaking truth. They wanted signs and miracles as proof, but Jesus gave them proof of God's existence in his words. His words have power and speak to our hearts and show us truth. The Bible is a truly unique book, it is a spiritual book and to be read with spiritual eyes, you won't understand it if you read it with your mind like the atheists do. Science is the study of the physical world and therefore not a good benchmark for judging spiritual matters.
There most definitely is a God DraKKar, you can be sure of that! You can see evidence of him working in his people - true Christians. Find a good church so you can be moved by their love and faith. Put your faith in him and let your life be transformed my his great love.
Things for you to read:
Is God a delusion: Is God a delusion?
Something also on science: Do faith in God and science contradict?
SALVATION: What are the steps to salvation?
You won't find Jesus on an Atheist website. Read the New Testament books of: Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. Pray to God with an open heart. Ask God to show you who Jesus is. Ask God to open your eyes and show you truth. We can't save ourselves as everything comes from God, our faith comes from God and it is through his words and faith in Jesus Christ that our lives and minds are transformed, being born again as new people, freed from sin and all doubt will disappear. This is the power of the Gospel to save!
Of course those atheists will find fault in the Bible because their minds are already made up before they read it. Their hearts are hardened to the point that they can't see truth, they are the one's that are in fact deluded by their own egos and pride, they hide behind this facade and this has made them blind to God and become ignorant to the facts of their own lives. Yes, they are intelligent and have intellect and come up with some compelling arguments, but these answers can never fill in the emptiness in their hearts which only God's love can do. Jesus had to deal with such people in his day and they nailed him to the cross for speaking truth. They wanted signs and miracles as proof, but Jesus gave them proof of God's existence in his words. His words have power and speak to our hearts and show us truth. The Bible is a truly unique book, it is a spiritual book and to be read with spiritual eyes, you won't understand it if you read it with your mind like the atheists do. Science is the study of the physical world and therefore not a good benchmark for judging spiritual matters.
There most definitely is a God DraKKar, you can be sure of that! You can see evidence of him working in his people - true Christians. Find a good church so you can be moved by their love and faith. Put your faith in him and let your life be transformed my his great love.
Things for you to read:
Is God a delusion: Is God a delusion?
Something also on science: Do faith in God and science contradict?
SALVATION: What are the steps to salvation?
Hope this helps you out somewhat?
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Update: I started viewing pornography again the other day after months of not doing so. Afterwards i felt bad about it. I am angry and depressed all the time and push God away. In fact, i have gone back to being an Atheist. I have been trolling trying to annoy people on various websites, but i feel bad about that too. Come to think of it, my whole internet identity is one big lie. I picked up my Bible today. It's the Christian Community Bible: Catholic Pastoral Edition. I've started reading it and i am going to try reading it cover to cover.
I've also started to look at this website: Welcome to AntiPornography.org - Your home for anti-pornography, anti-prostitution, and anti-sex trafficking education and activist resources It's non-religious though. If anyone can give me the address of a Christian anti-porn website, i promise i'll check it out.
I've also started to look at this website: Welcome to AntiPornography.org - Your home for anti-pornography, anti-prostitution, and anti-sex trafficking education and activist resources It's non-religious though. If anyone can give me the address of a Christian anti-porn website, i promise i'll check it out.
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Setting the captives free is a Christian website where you can follow a 60 day course of bible study and accountability to escape porn addiction. It's very good - have a look and see what you think.
Can I suggest that rather than reading the bible cover to cover, you start by reading one of the gospels and the psalms - I think you will find it easier to find Jesus there initially.
Praying for you
Can I suggest that rather than reading the bible cover to cover, you start by reading one of the gospels and the psalms - I think you will find it easier to find Jesus there initially.
Praying for you
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Non sequitur
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Sorry to hear you are having problems.
You keep doing it, because it provides you 'something' for where your conscious (probably sub) says 'something' is missing and should/would like to be there; people rarely just randomly do things for no reason or purpose.
What is the satisfaction you get from it, prior to feeling empty and depressed?
Do you... "arrive at some completion" or just visibly browse, and nothing more?
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I think i only look at porn because i have no one in my life at the moment. And it's an outlet. I don't really even enjoy looking at it after the initial excitement has worn off(usually after a few minutes). It's like something takes me over and i just keep clicking from one site to the next and before i know it a couple of hours has passed.
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gav1nzdad
Somewhere in the middle
Hey brother. You know, your honesty is appreciated. I have a hunch that this is a more common problem that most men are willing to admit.
You can read all the books you want, and I'm not saying that is a bad thing, necessarily. But what is really needed to break the bonds of this type of addiction is to stay in constant prayer with God. He is ALWAYS with us. He hears our pleading when we are facing temptation.
I can tell you that you can not break this stronghold on your own. Only by focusing completely on Him AT ALL TIMES, will you be victorious through His power.
I am praying for you man.
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