Which is better or ideal?
Does it just depend on the person or is one morally wrong?
Does it just depend on the person or is one morally wrong?
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Polyamory vs Monogamy
- Thread starter ke1985
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[bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]tyness versus Monogamy for those of you who are uninitiated.
As for me, I guess it depends on how concerned you are about vernerial diseases.
As for me, I guess it depends on how concerned you are about vernerial diseases.
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haha, well at least we all know you are honest with your posts
Its an interesting topic. Lets see where it goes.
You might want to start one on peacocking or NLP for dating while you're at it.
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Skaloop
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What constitutes [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]tiness? How many partners are required? If one guy has two girlfriends, each of whom is monogamous with him, I don't see how that can constitute [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]tiness.
And if there is no concern for VD (you have two partners with whom you are exclusive, are exclusive to you, and all three of you are free from VD), that isn't even an issue.
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I have read from pro polyamory people that those who are monogamous are generally more insecure and not able to love like those in polygamous relationships. Do you agree?
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Poly means many. The community in which the word polyamorous is used uses the word to mean many. Maybe not legion-like many but more than a couple.
Check out one of their sites but I don't condone what they do:
fastseduction.com
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chingchang
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Skaloop
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Poly means more than one. Two is more than one. Some people may certainly want more than two, but the question was not about them specifically, but polyamory in general, which includes two. So what number constitutes many for you, and when does it become wrong?
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Verv
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Polyamory is so wrong I would not even just really call it 'morally wrong,' I think it is better summed up with merely being wrong.
Are humans capable of sharing each other without jealousy? Are humans capable of doing anything without a concept of possession or exclusivity?
And can mankind properly raise families having no idea whose kid is whose, etc.? I know this concept worked minimally in some tribal societies but it does not make sense on a larger scale.
Polyamory is merely some sort of contrived excuse for misbehavior by adults "in the name of love."
Furthermore:
I do not believe in the concept of romantic love, and neither does Christ.
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chingchang
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What makes it "wrong"?
Yes...as proven by the millions of people around the world living that lifestyle and loving it.
I believe so...not all humans...and obviously not you.
Actually...if it "makes sense" on a small scale then it can make sense on a large scale. However...it wouldn't work because we don't all live by the same ideals.
Some people don't consider sexual relationships "misbehavior". Actually...we're designed to have sexual relationships.
What does romantic love have to do with sex?
CC
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Fenny the Fox
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I, for one, will not say that one is inherently immoral.
Nor that one is ideal.
It depends on the individuals on the relationship.
I have known some who were very happy -and healthy- in a poly relationship. And a very complex one at that. (Ask me to explain it if you want more than just "complex", but otherwise I will leave it at that.)
And have known some for whom it did not work.
And, as for the comment on "[bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]tiness," etc. - I think that would be "open" and "free" relationships, not poly-amorous ones.
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I think exclusivity is important. Whether it is with one or several mates. I think the Bible backs this concept up.
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Some monogamous people would claim that poly people are similarly unable to love. I would disagree with both claims.
Monogamous or polyamarous, I feel that jealousy and posessiveness, and the associated lack of trust, are the most damaging things in a relationship. The idea of 'owning' another person is personally repellant.
Polyamarous relationships can work very well, in my own experience and from seeing other people's. It's not for everyone, and I wouldn't in a million years think any the less of anyone for how they feel about.
It simply requires trust and communication, which I feel are vital for any relationship.
And for the avoidance of VDs, as well!
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sidhe
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I don't believe in the concept of romantic love either. I also believe that jealousy is learned, as is the concept that we ever own another person. I also believe that we're capable of far more generosity and kindness and self-control than someone like you gives humankind credit for.
That's why I'm polyamorous - the notion that I only love one person is outrageous to me. The equation of "polyamory" with "multiple sexual partners" seems a little bizarre. If celibate monogamous relationships are possible, then celibate polyamorous relationships are as well. I'm sexually monogamous - that doesn't mean that my intimacy and my love are also confined to a single person.
That people are willing to reduce human relationships to sex so readily is, I believe, a big issue. A good conversation or a simple hug when needed can be far more intimate and bonding than sex.
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Polyamory = Loving more than one person. The key phrase there is loving. Love is a wonderful and freeing thing. Fear is the opposite of Love. Being afraid means you are not capable of loving fully. Jealousy - a form of fear - is the opposite of love.
Is it hard for people, especially conservative Christians, to fathom loving more than one person? Surprisingly. yes, it is hard for them, especially with the Catholic church being hell-bent on teaching life-long heterosexual monogamy, and this has found its way into the very core of our sociocultural beliefs. We also have evolutionary psychology working against us as well - mate guarding, but this is something that we can overcome and control with work. It can be unlearned and/or mitigated.
There is a great Google Knol article on Polyamory. There are lots of great resources out there to set yourself free from fear.
A few people above me have hit on some key points - trust, communication, and there is also a running theme of egalitarianism too.
I still find it baffling why conservative Christians have a problem with open, honest, and loving relationships...
Is it hard for people, especially conservative Christians, to fathom loving more than one person? Surprisingly. yes, it is hard for them, especially with the Catholic church being hell-bent on teaching life-long heterosexual monogamy, and this has found its way into the very core of our sociocultural beliefs. We also have evolutionary psychology working against us as well - mate guarding, but this is something that we can overcome and control with work. It can be unlearned and/or mitigated.
There is a great Google Knol article on Polyamory. There are lots of great resources out there to set yourself free from fear.
A few people above me have hit on some key points - trust, communication, and there is also a running theme of egalitarianism too.
I still find it baffling why conservative Christians have a problem with open, honest, and loving relationships...
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David Brider
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Personally, I don't have any particular problem with polyamory. It's not for me, I'm very much a one person man, but if other people feel that a polyamorous relationship is right for them, then I don't see it as being a problem.
David.
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