Title: Agony
What is this I feel....
Stabbing... deep pain,
The hurt beyond the hurts...
It makes my world dizzy...
I pant... I pant...
Breadth..... Breadth.
Who can ease my pain?
I am stubborn,
I know it,
The traits of my ancestors,
What I have been born with,
Pain, despair.
Pain comes when love
Goes unfulfilled,
Betrayal I never feel,
Caused by my own misunderstanding.
Tears...
I don't need them....
What I need is strength,
The will to succeed.
My life that belongs to someone else,
I have no choice but to live it.
Woes... pain ... sorrow.
The devil's hands upon me,
He knows I am vulnerable now,
In my anger at somebody else,
I cannot resist him.
A helpless babe....
Trapped in a situation,
She doesn't look for.
My world... a heap of ruins.
I do not know where
To find that courage to live.
Failures after failures
committed by my flesh...
my hands.... ah..... unclean! Unclean!
My heart, anger and mind....
They don't mix.
I hate to see lies,
Bear false hopes....
The person I loves never answers....
Written: 06/02/2004
Brief comment: I am in anguish. I am in pain. The Somebody refers to in this poem is none other than God. In my anger and in my pain, I refuse to call him, God. The pain is there because I think God betrays me. I know he doesnt betray me, I know the pain is caused by my own misunderstanding but that doesnt ease my feeling of being betrayed by someone I love. God, who is usually full of words to guide me, is unusually silent in the midst of this great pain. This is another one of my pain poems.
What is this I feel....
Stabbing... deep pain,
The hurt beyond the hurts...
It makes my world dizzy...
I pant... I pant...
Breadth..... Breadth.
Who can ease my pain?
I am stubborn,
I know it,
The traits of my ancestors,
What I have been born with,
Pain, despair.
Pain comes when love
Goes unfulfilled,
Betrayal I never feel,
Caused by my own misunderstanding.
Tears...
I don't need them....
What I need is strength,
The will to succeed.
My life that belongs to someone else,
I have no choice but to live it.
Woes... pain ... sorrow.
The devil's hands upon me,
He knows I am vulnerable now,
In my anger at somebody else,
I cannot resist him.
A helpless babe....
Trapped in a situation,
She doesn't look for.
My world... a heap of ruins.
I do not know where
To find that courage to live.
Failures after failures
committed by my flesh...
my hands.... ah..... unclean! Unclean!
My heart, anger and mind....
They don't mix.
I hate to see lies,
Bear false hopes....
The person I loves never answers....
Written: 06/02/2004
Brief comment: I am in anguish. I am in pain. The Somebody refers to in this poem is none other than God. In my anger and in my pain, I refuse to call him, God. The pain is there because I think God betrays me. I know he doesnt betray me, I know the pain is caused by my own misunderstanding but that doesnt ease my feeling of being betrayed by someone I love. God, who is usually full of words to guide me, is unusually silent in the midst of this great pain. This is another one of my pain poems.
