Please pray - spiking badly

[zingiber]

Please pray for me. My OCD has been beginning to flare; please pray that I do not tip over the edge, because that is very nasty for me and those around me. I have been quite good for a while, and I know that my thoughts are OCD, but as usual the fear is hard to handle and predisposes the mind to a wrong view of reality. Please pray that I may know God's peace.

 

[RuthD]

I am praying for you to get peace through Jesus Christ. If you have a doctor I would call him/her. Maybe a doctor would help. My doctor has come up with the right medications that have brought me peace. All the best to you.

 

[HopingForJesus]

Praying for you. Try to relax in God's peace if you can at all so you can hopefully clear your mind. I hope he grants you some peace of mind soon. God bless

 

[zingiber]

Thanks both of you, very much. Prayer is what helps most.

I have been distracting myself (a little bit hard to relax) and giving the OCD little attention, but I can't really escape the background anxiety. I feel a bit more hopeful now, because it is the morning, and I always feel better in the morning! Hopefully I can use this to jump on top of the OCD horse (it is easier when it isn't bucking!) and then hopefully I can stay there.

RuthD - as to the doctor, I am due to meet my psychologist soon, before christmas. She always helps me - it is like shes sees things that I can't. Then again, she probably does! I just wish she was a christian.

Again, thankyou, and God bless you both

 

[HopingForJesus]

You do sound more positive I wish I had a Christian therapist too. I haven't been back to mine in quite awhile. I hope you feel better soon. Peace

 

[zingiber]

Thanks HopingForJesus.

I am not too bad. The OCD is just under control, but is continually simmering. I'm sure you all understand! I am just always so scared of God - feeling unforgivable. I'm sure you all understand that too! The worst thing is, I am no longer praying much, so I am not even talking with him. Praying leads to spikes, and I am being sort of cowardly (or compulsivey) and trying to avoid the fear.

Thanks for the prayers.

 

[HopingForJesus]

Yeah I know what you mean about avoiding prayer. I have been able to pray a little but my mind still plays games even if not as bad as it used to. I finally read a little of my Bible last night amidst the OCD trying to rear its ugly head. It is good that we can come to this forum which is a true blessing and we can find out we are not alone in suffering this way. It helps me at least to know I am not alone. I guess I always expect to be dealing with the OCD at one level or another. Thank goodness God knows us better than we know ourselves. Have an awesome day...

 

[zingiber]

Thanks again, and Amen!

 

[Dogperson]

I too suffer from OCD. I also have panic attacks & general depression. I know exactly what you mean about not knowing if your thoughts are reflecting reality or not. I have trouble judging the seriousness of situations. Something will happen that sort of upsets my balance & then I'm into a continual obsessive thought about one problem until it becomes gigantic. I lose all perspective about it. Like right now I'm obsessed with health. I had a sinus infection that started in Oct & took 3 rounds of antibiotics to cure & also was sent for CT scan which (Praise God!) was normal. Then I came down with a kidney infection & am on antibiotics again. My sinuses are still bothering me but everyone I've seen thinks they are just dried out from the low indoor humidity. I start panicking because last year I really feel sure the Lord led me to allergy shots & they have worked like a miracle. I felt like He promised me I would not have to suffer the rest of my life (I'm about to be 40) with these allergies. This was the first year of my life I ever felt like a normal person. Now that I've had some sinus issues I am panicking & doubting what I believe the Lord said. I have had to go back on Paxil & Klonopin. I'm trying to pray but I notice that my prayers become repetitive when I'm like this & the panic makes me feel distant from God. When I have trouble reading the Bible or praying I sometimes find it helpful to read some of the Psalms out loud. David prayed many a prayer when he was in deep distress & we know that God delivered him over & over again, so I use the Psalms when I can't find the words. It is difficult sometimes to read the Bible when I'm so depressed & upset but I feel that's the only way to work through this, just stay in the Word as much as possible. I just don't believe God wants me to live a life of defeat & despair. It goes against everything He promises in His Word. I do feel guilty for not having more faith, like I could beat this disorder if I just believed enough. I sometimes beat myself up over that. I don't know if I will ever be healed of this or not but I feel certain there has to be some way to achieve a better quality of life through my relationship with the Lord. I wish I had the answer as to how to do that. I feel for every one of you who is suffering with OCD. It runs in my family & many of us have been robbed by it of the peace & joy that should be ours in Jesus Christ. Heavenly Father, I pray for each one here who deals with OCD. Father, you've seen the anguish we've suffered because of it and I ask that You lay Your mighty hand of peace on each one of us, that we would be made whole mentally, physically & spiritually. I ask that You would help us to be so in love with Your Word that we can't stay out of it. Help us to feel Your presence when we call out to You in prayer. Father, Your word says You have not given us a spirit of fear but of power and love and a sound mind. Help us not to be deceived by thoughts that are not true but to be built up & comforted in Your truth. Make each one of us more than a conqueror through Jesus Christ our Lord. In His name & for His eternal glory. Amen!

 

[zingiber]

Thanks Dogperson, and again, Amen to what you wrote!

I am pretty much under control. I almost had a panic attack this evening, but just skirted it. Otherwise, I have been flatlining, really.