Performing Christian wedding?

[Nick L]

Hello all!

My brother asked me to officiate his wedding because I am: "the only religious person he knows", which I guess is nice. It gives me a good opportunity to witness a little to him and his girlfriend, but also bring a bible message to the wedding.

My problem - all the places to get ordained online are goofy non-religious websites with no doctrinal statement or serious church affiliation. Some are "spiritual" and talk about humanism... but NONE of them talk about God in any serious way.

What should I do? I want to perform the ceremony, I am honored. But I do not want to add my name to the many non-religious organizations that treat the covenant of marriage like a carnival prize.

Thanks in advance! Nick

 

[Michie]

Why not go for a real ordained minister instead? They could just go to the courthouse otherwise.

 

[Nick L]

Thanks for your reply.

I don't believe I am called to preach, and I wouldn't have time to go to school to become an official Christian minister. My brother doesn't want to get married at a courthouse. I really believe this is his way of inviting the Lord into his wedding and I don't want to let that opportunity go.

 

[Albion]

What should I do? I want to perform the ceremony, I am honored. But I do not want to add my name to the many non-religious organizations that treat the covenant of marriage like a carnival prize.

It sounds like you cannot do both of those, Nick.

On the other hand, some states don't require that the officiant be a minister or government official...anyone can perform the ceremony. So if that applies to you, and it obviously wouldn't offend the brother who has already asked you to be the officiant, you might approach the problem that way.

 

[Benam]

When my wife and I married, we wanted a certain person to officiate, but he could not do the legal side of things. So the night before we had an "official" marriage done by a marriage commissioner with just us and two witnesses, and the next day we had what we consider our proper marriage ceremony. It was everything one would expect from a wedding minus the signing of the certificate.

 

[tampasteve]

In many states you do not have to be ordained. For example, in Florida one can be a Notary Public and perform weddings. In that case you could become legally able to marry them, while also not pretending to be a minister. You could find inspiration in how to do the wedding out of minister's handbooks and books of prayer/worship.

 

[PloverWing]

When my wife and I married, we wanted a certain person to officiate, but he could not do the legal side of things. So the night before we had an "official" marriage done by a marriage commissioner with just us and two witnesses, and the next day we had what we consider our proper marriage ceremony. It was everything one would expect from a wedding minus the signing of the certificate.

I like this approach quite a bit. The legal contract can happen the day before, presided over by a judge or a similar civil authority, and then you can preside over the marriage ceremony the next day, with the dresses and flowers and reception, without worrying about whether you're "official", and without pretending you're a member of the clergy in a religion that's not yours.

 

[Nick L]

Thank you all for your sound advice!! I think I am going to talk to my brother and explain my conviction and let him weigh-in.

I am so glad I found this online community.

 

[GirdYourLoins]

Personally, I would say dont worry about the content of the course and just do it so you can officiate the wedding. Whether you do it or not is only going to affect you, they wont be bothered about one less person. You are doing it for your own reasons and as you said it will give you the chance to witness to them bring a bible message. If you dont do it you will be letting them down and denying yourself that opportunity. At the end of the day the online ordination is just a means of doing that.We are surrounded by secular opinion and teaching every day, did you learn evolution in school? I also know a minister who encourages Christians to learn about other beliefs so you can witness to believers of that belief from a position of knowledge. I dont really see a reason not to do it.

 

[NomNomPizza]

Hello all!

My brother asked me to officiate his wedding because I am: "the only religious person he knows", which I guess is nice. It gives me a good opportunity to witness a little to him and his girlfriend, but also bring a bible message to the wedding.

My problem - all the places to get ordained online are goofy non-religious websites with no doctrinal statement or serious church affiliation. Some are "spiritual" and talk about humanism... but NONE of them talk about God in any serious way.

What should I do? I want to perform the ceremony, I am honored. But I do not want to add my name to the many non-religious organizations that treat the covenant of marriage like a carnival prize.

Thanks in advance! Nick

Ye u don't need any of that nonsense for just piece of paper from goverment to "allow" you get married.
Simply u need witnesses , they make vows , future husband and wife make vows , then you ask if anybody has something to stop wedding , if nobody object then you proclaim them wife and husband simple.

You don't need any piece of paper from somebody to do marriage....
They did it in Vegas called 15min marriages.