Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.
ROFlWhether to pay for things on dates or not is so strange to me.
Before you read the first sentence in the next paragraph and think I'm in the wrong section you may want to know I am a widow. My husband died when he was kind of young.
When I met the man I married he paid for everything all the time. He wouldn't have had it any other way. He never expected anything in return for his doing what came natural for him to do. He never complained about it and he paid for things for all the women he dated before me, too. Like I said it was natural.
The Word of God says that a man should be a good provider. If a man does not provide for his own he is worse than an infidel.
A pastor's wife told me that women should be taught to look for a good provider.
If every date is a possible mate and I heard that phrase in church how is a woman going to know if the man is a good provider if he isn't willing to provide on dates?
I know it's a new day and age. I heard about girls paying for their own way when I was in high school. It just doesn't seem right in serious relationships.
Since my husband's death I have dated and I share paying for dates. It really doesn't bother me immensely but I don't think a woman should ever be EXPECTED to pay for dates unless she isn't seriously interested in the man.
It seems to be an insult to a real man to have the woman pay for things if he asked her out. It would seem a woman is taking advantage of a man if she lets him pay for things if she's gotten to know him and she isn't interested in him in a serious way.
Just the thoughts I have this morning. These thoughts can be altered as I learn more about dating again after years of marriage.
Oh yeah..... I do believe the man should pay for the first date if he asked her out.
Why the delay in equality?I think the guy should pay for the first few dates and then when its more than a casual thing and you're doing it regularly you cna take turns
So you are saying that if the prospect of intimate realtaions is not present then they both should pay, but if the prospect of intimate relations is present the man should pay. Sound a great deal like hooking to me.I sincerely feel as though it shows much weakness on the man's part if he expects the woman to pay.
It all depends on what kind of relationship they plan on sharing. If it's casual Christian friendship then things are different than if they are considering a stronger relationship.
Huh - interesting conclusion as I never saw the word intimate mentioned once in ElElena's post...So you are saying that if the prospect of intimate realtaions is not present then they both should pay, but if the prospect of intimate relations is present the man should pay. Sound a great deal like hooking to me.
That's a nice idea -- There are still those fellows out there that don't mind showing they are good providers by taking care of their woman from the start and they show more strength of character by never allowing the woman to be the one to have to pay.
I see a man providing for his woman as a very strong point for the fact that he is showing her he can provide for her in the future, too. It is also important that he never makes her feel like she owes him anything -- Money cannot buy love.
If a gentleman is asking a lady out on a date, I think it is expected that he pick up the tab.
Now, I think this has to start changing once this goes from dates to a relationship. At that point, I think it is fair for the parties to split checks, alternate who pays, pay on their own tabs, etc.... But during the initial dating phase, I think it is perfectly fine to assume the guy is going to pay and even to expect it.
Coach
I expect to pay for the first few dates, but when you've been going together a while, this is the modern world and women do work.
If women want to be equal in every way they need to start acting like it.
We use cookies and similar technologies for the following purposes:
Do you accept cookies and these technologies?
We use cookies and similar technologies for the following purposes:
Do you accept cookies and these technologies?