I'm 40 years old and was married for 20 years and now recently widowed. I'm in need of some Christian books on how to deal with Controlling Parents. It's went on all of my life. My husband would usually run interference but now he's gone. I don't want my teenage son to deal with this issue. My mother has always thought she knows God's Will for my life. I've been attending another denomination on Sunday nights and Wednesday nights and when she finds out...it will hit the fan. How do I know this? Because a few years ago my husband, son, and I left the Baptist church she and my dad attend and joined another Baptist Church (of like faith and order) and you would have thought I had committed unforgivable sin. Another example: a few months ago a friend invited me to drive up north with her and be gone for 3 to 4 days and my mother told me I couldn't. I was thinking....excuse me. I was so upset, but didn't go. I ready to let her know how I feel, but I want to do it in a Christian manner. So if anyone has any book ideas that might help or even scriptures, I would be grateful. Thanks bunches!
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Parents controlling their adult child...Help!
- Thread starter 88keys
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Well, Exodus 20:12 on honoring your parents. Remember that honoring means speaking well of and politely to them and acting in a way that shows courtesy and respect. Does that mean obey them? No, you are an adult out on your own. God bless you in these trying times.
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superbear02
Senior Veteran
I believe you should try to communicate with her on it, sometimes parents don't listen...I certainly know that but trying can't hurt!
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sparrow1029
beauty for ashes
Just to give another perspective 
When I was little, my mom would take my brother and I to church with her. Now, at around that time, she was dealing with a diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis (MS), and this was scary for her, and it caused her to have a lot of questions. Long story short, the leadership in this particular church wasn't very compassionate. As a result, she started seeking another denomination, and she found one and started attending. Our whole family (aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins, etc) belonged to the domination that she left, and they were outraged. They made things very difficult for my mother, because to them it was like a betrayal ofhow they raised her. But, she persevered, and I am so glad!
The church that she'd been attending was very ceremonial, and didn't encourage its congregants to read the Bible. The new church did, and so I got the wonderful experience of being exposed to the Word of God as a child--it shaped me in ways that I can't begin to describe. The person I am now, and the faith I have now, is due largely in part to my mothers perseverance in getting us to a different church.
Be brave! Be compassionate, and kind, to your mother, too--maybe its for her as it was for my mothers family. They weren't upset because they thought we were falling away from God. They were upset because they felt like my mother was somehow betraying them. This may be an instance where all the arguments and all the logic won't sway your mom, and you just have to do this. Your mom will eventually come around, I think. The rest of my family isn't upset anymore, and the world didn't end because they were! If God is compelling you to go to a different church, then its God you need to obey
When I was little, my mom would take my brother and I to church with her. Now, at around that time, she was dealing with a diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis (MS), and this was scary for her, and it caused her to have a lot of questions. Long story short, the leadership in this particular church wasn't very compassionate. As a result, she started seeking another denomination, and she found one and started attending. Our whole family (aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins, etc) belonged to the domination that she left, and they were outraged. They made things very difficult for my mother, because to them it was like a betrayal ofhow they raised her. But, she persevered, and I am so glad! The church that she'd been attending was very ceremonial, and didn't encourage its congregants to read the Bible. The new church did, and so I got the wonderful experience of being exposed to the Word of God as a child--it shaped me in ways that I can't begin to describe. The person I am now, and the faith I have now, is due largely in part to my mothers perseverance in getting us to a different church.
Be brave! Be compassionate, and kind, to your mother, too--maybe its for her as it was for my mothers family. They weren't upset because they thought we were falling away from God. They were upset because they felt like my mother was somehow betraying them. This may be an instance where all the arguments and all the logic won't sway your mom, and you just have to do this. Your mom will eventually come around, I think. The rest of my family isn't upset anymore, and the world didn't end because they were! If God is compelling you to go to a different church, then its God you need to obey
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