panic attack induced derealization and depersonalization

[curlysouffle]

hi all I'm new to the forums and decided to post on here because I need help figuring out why I'm going through derealization and depersonalization and what if anything I can do to help get back to normal. it happened back in late April one night I came home and was reading tthe bible a lot during those times , and I went and googled how many chances does Jesus give and a page came up on the search that said only two, so I panicked because I haven't been repenting after having come to the truth and it had been as far as I know my second chance. I panicked so bad that I was having intrusive thoughts saying I was going to hell for my past sins and it was not my voice that i was hearing in my head,and I felt this immense burning pain in my forehead that felt like it was being compressed.then suddenly my thoughts seemed far away [the depersonalization set in] and I was scared to fall asleep so I tried to fall asleep in the living room with my parents. I got about two hours of sleep and woke up startled and remember saying 'no' to whatever the thing I saw was that was threatening to take my vision. it looked like a white light but i dont know what it was. needless to say I was fearful of what had just happened from me just reading a page off Google saying I wasn't able to be saved.. for the next few days i had trouble sleeping scared that something worse was gonna happen to me in my sleep and with depersonqlization and derealization it is so hard to have faith in God. well now fast forward today I am still experiencing anxiety, derealization, depersonalization, sensitivity to light, floaters in vision, lightheadedness, obsessive thoughts, fear of judgement from.others, etc.. im able to fall asleep easier but i don't know what to do to get back to being normal. im so mad at myself for googling any of that and getting myself into this mess. should i see a pastor? get on anxiety meds? im reading the bible, Christian books, and praying but I feel i need some more guidance. any help is greatly appreciated. i just wish more than anything to be able to see the world with correct depth perception and feel alive again

 

[DeerGlow]

hi all I'm new to the forums and decided to post on here because I need help figuring out why I'm going through derealization and depersonalization and what if anything I can do to help get back to normal. it happened back in late April one night I came home and was reading tthe bible a lot during those times , and I went and googled how many chances does Jesus give and a page came up on the search that said only two, so I panicked because I haven't been repenting after having come to the truth and it had been as far as I know my second chance. I panicked so bad that I was having intrusive thoughts saying I was going to hell for my past sins and it was not my voice that i was hearing in my head,and I felt this immense burning pain in my forehead that felt like it was being compressed.then suddenly my thoughts seemed far away [the depersonalization set in] and I was scared to fall asleep so I tried to fall asleep in the living room with my parents. I got about two hours of sleep and woke up startled and remember saying 'no' to whatever the thing I saw was that was threatening to take my vision. it looked like a white light but i dont know what it was. needless to say I was fearful of what had just happened from me just reading a page off Google saying I wasn't able to be saved.. for the next few days i had trouble sleeping scared that something worse was gonna happen to me in my sleep and with depersonqlization and derealization it is so hard to have faith in God. well now fast forward today I am still experiencing anxiety, derealization, depersonalization, sensitivity to light, floaters in vision, lightheadedness, obsessive thoughts, fear of judgement from.others, etc.. im able to fall asleep easier but i don't know what to do to get back to being normal. im so mad at myself for googling any of that and getting myself into this mess. should i see a pastor? get on anxiety meds? im reading the bible, Christian books, and praying but I feel i need some more guidance. any help is greatly appreciated. i just wish more than anything to be able to see the world with correct depth perception and feel alive again

Where'd you get two?

“Then Peter came up and said to him, "Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?" Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.”

‭‭Matthew‬ ‭18:21-22‬ ‭ESV‬‬

This is often understood as however many times someone sins against you, if they ask for forgiveness you forgive them no matter how many times they have done it. Look at what Jesus said here, it's not two fails and you're done.

 

[Solomons Porch]

Hello and welcome to CF

it happened back in late April

Were you or had you ever experienced any of this before April? Or was this the first time and the beginning of this torment?

 

[DeerGlow]

hi all I'm new to the forums and decided to post on here because I need help figuring out why I'm going through derealization and depersonalization and what if anything I can do to help get back to normal. it happened back in late April one night I came home and was reading tthe bible a lot during those times , and I went and googled how many chances does Jesus give and a page came up on the search that said only two, so I panicked because I haven't been repenting after having come to the truth and it had been as far as I know my second chance. I panicked so bad that I was having intrusive thoughts saying I was going to hell for my past sins and it was not my voice that i was hearing in my head,and I felt this immense burning pain in my forehead that felt like it was being compressed.then suddenly my thoughts seemed far away [the depersonalization set in] and I was scared to fall asleep so I tried to fall asleep in the living room with my parents. I got about two hours of sleep and woke up startled and remember saying 'no' to whatever the thing I saw was that was threatening to take my vision. it looked like a white light but i dont know what it was. needless to say I was fearful of what had just happened from me just reading a page off Google saying I wasn't able to be saved.. for the next few days i had trouble sleeping scared that something worse was gonna happen to me in my sleep and with depersonqlization and derealization it is so hard to have faith in God. well now fast forward today I am still experiencing anxiety, derealization, depersonalization, sensitivity to light, floaters in vision, lightheadedness, obsessive thoughts, fear of judgement from.others, etc.. im able to fall asleep easier but i don't know what to do to get back to being normal. im so mad at myself for googling any of that and getting myself into this mess. should i see a pastor? get on anxiety meds? im reading the bible, Christian books, and praying but I feel i need some more guidance. any help is greatly appreciated. i just wish more than anything to be able to see the world with correct depth perception and feel alive again

You recognise that you haven't been repenting as you should. So don't wait repent now, we are not promised tomorrow.

 

[Winken]

hi all I'm new to the forums and decided to post on here because I need help figuring out why I'm going through derealization and depersonalization and what if anything I can do to help get back to normal. it happened back in late April one night I came home and was reading tthe bible a lot during those times , and I went and googled how many chances does Jesus give and a page came up on the search that said only two, so I panicked because I haven't been repenting after having come to the truth and it had been as far as I know my second chance. I panicked so bad that I was having intrusive thoughts saying I was going to hell for my past sins and it was not my voice that i was hearing in my head,and I felt this immense burning pain in my forehead that felt like it was being compressed.then suddenly my thoughts seemed far away [the depersonalization set in] and I was scared to fall asleep so I tried to fall asleep in the living room with my parents. I got about two hours of sleep and woke up startled and remember saying 'no' to whatever the thing I saw was that was threatening to take my vision. it looked like a white light but i dont know what it was. needless to say I was fearful of what had just happened from me just reading a page off Google saying I wasn't able to be saved.. for the next few days i had trouble sleeping scared that something worse was gonna happen to me in my sleep and with depersonqlization and derealization it is so hard to have faith in God. well now fast forward today I am still experiencing anxiety, derealization, depersonalization, sensitivity to light, floaters in vision, lightheadedness, obsessive thoughts, fear of judgement from.others, etc.. im able to fall asleep easier but i don't know what to do to get back to being normal. im so mad at myself for googling any of that and getting myself into this mess. should i see a pastor? get on anxiety meds? im reading the bible, Christian books, and praying but I feel i need some more guidance. any help is greatly appreciated. i just wish more than anything to be able to see the world with correct depth perception and feel alive again

It is not about the "number of chances." Tuck that Truth away: Yield to the Holy Spirit as He convicts you of that blessed Truth.

Let me clue you in about newness of life, okay? God does not cause anxiety. HE does not will anxiety. You were doing okay, then you began questioning your salvation.

Once you sin, after being born again (John 3:3), you aren't "lost" again, you are still secure in Him. You repent (1 John 1:9) for "falling off the wagon" in your journey with Jesus. He gives you a hand up right back upon the Path that He chose for you the first time you confessed Jesus as Savior. Once again, your past is forgotten: He paid the bill (so much for a "number of chances.")

If you think you need to visit with a medical doctor, preferably a psychiatrist, check out what your insurance covers, then get on the phone to one, make an appointment.

 

[curlysouffle]

Hello and welcome to CF


Were you or had you ever experienced any of this before April? Or was this the first time and the beginning of this torment?

I did have mild depersonalization back in January but I didn't know it at the time, it went away. maybe I'm prone to it because I worry a lot..

 

[curlysouffle]

It is not about the "number of chances." Tuck that Truth away: Yield to the Holy Spirit as He convicts you of that blessed Truth.

Let me clue you in about newness of life, okay? God does not cause anxiety. HE does not will anxiety. You were doing okay, then you began questioning your salvation.

Once you sin, after being born again (John 3:3), you aren't "lost" again, you are still secure in Him. You repent (1 John 1:9) for "falling off the wagon" in your journey with Jesus. He gives you a hand up right back upon the Path that He chose for you the first time you confessed Jesus as Savior. Once again, your past is forgotten: He paid the bill (so much for a "number of chances.")

If you think you need to visit with a medical doctor, preferably a psychiatrist, check out what your insurance covers, then get on the phone to one, make an appointment.

yeah I know that's why I'm so mad at myself for questioning and getting myself into this mess. I might get on meds soon

 

[curlysouffle]

You recognise that you haven't been repenting as you should. So don't wait repent now, we are not promised tomorrow.

I will, I'm recognizing that I struggle with letting go of sin and will try my best from now on

 

[Solomons Porch]

I did have mild depersonalization back in January but I didn't know it at the time, it went away. maybe I'm prone to it because I worry a lot..

So this year things have been happening that never happened before? What are you so worried about? And are you on any medications? Or are you considering it now?

 

[curlysouffle]

So this year things have been happening that never happened before? What are you so worried about? And are you on any medications? Or are you considering it now?

yeah this year I've been more on edge I wish I could pinpoint the source of it all , but I'm not where I want to be in life and I've been feeling a failure because I'm not married and don't have a career at my age. i was deeply hurt by a guy i was seeing and his group of friends. he was an alcoholic and the habit rubbed off on me. also I was bullied a lot throughout mt life even at my last job, I feel I'm way too old to go through that and be scared of a bully. maybe all of these things combined contributed to it

 

[curlysouffle]

So this year things have been happening that never happened before? What are you so worried about? And are you on any medications? Or are you considering it now?

I'm not on any and I've always been anti prescription meds bevause of the adverse side effects but now I'm considering it if nothing else works

 

[Solomons Porch]

I'm not on any and I've always been anti prescription meds bevause of the adverse side effects but now I'm considering it if nothing else works

What are you so worried about, you said you worry alot?

 

[curlysouffle]

What are you so worried about, you said you worry alot?

things like being social, making enough money in the future, not ending up alone, my looks fading, my parents having to go back to their home country once my dad retires and me having to fend for myself

 

[Solomons Porch]

things like being social, making enough money in the future, not ending up alone, my looks fading, my parents having to go back to their home country once my dad retires and me having to fend for myself

Are you working now? Whats your goals? you are so young and have so much ahead of you, I would love to be 23 again. Oh man, I would take life by the horns and run. Seriously, the devil is just trying to weight you down kiddo. He knows your potential so he's fighting you to keep you down.

 

[curlysouffle]

Are you working now? Whats your goals? you are so young and have so much ahead of you, I would love to be 23 again. Oh man, I would take life by the horns and run. Seriously, the devil is just trying to weight you down kiddo. He knows your potential so he's fighting you to keep you down.

yes I'm working now I don't get that many hours but I like my coworkers. and I don't have any goals right now I feel like I can't accomplish them in this state it would be very hard as I have brain fog chronic fatigue and am not used to the symptoms

 

[Solomons Porch]

yes I'm working now I don't get that many hours but I like my coworkers. and I don't have any goals right now I feel like I can't accomplish them in this state it would be very hard as I have brain fog chronic fatigue and am not used to the symptoms

I had anxiety in my early 20's and I made up my mind that it wasnt gonna beat me, I had brain fog and all of that as well. I finally decided to fight it, because nothing was working, the medications made me "feel nothing" which was horrible for me. I began to get up early every morning and go for a hard walk, and did the same every evening, and it helped big time, and of course, I prayed and believed in God to help me and HE did, all I needed to do was make up my mind to fight and make changes.

 

[dougangel]

hi all I'm new to the forums and decided to post on here because I need help figuring out why I'm going through derealization and depersonalization and what if anything I can do to help get back to normal. it happened back in late April one night I came home and was reading tthe bible a lot during those times , and I went and googled how many chances does Jesus give and a page came up on the search that said only two, so I panicked because I haven't been repenting after having come to the truth and it had been as far as I know my second chance.

Hey curlysouffle

Bless you for the courage to confess that.
Matthew 6:25-34 [Full Chapter]
[ Do Not Worry ] “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? ...

We are being bombarded with the worry's of the world more than ever. I have to remind my self of Matt 6.

Have faith that Jesus is with you and loves you.
I have to remind my self that its not of God to have fear and continually harbour thoughts of fear.
Be Joyful no matter what we are going through is mentioned many times in the bible. THis is very important for a christian to realise.
Look up bible passages about fear and anxiety worry and joy in a concordance.And see what God says about it. Doing this has helped me alot

 

[curlysouffle]

Hey curlysouffle

Bless you for the courage to confess that.
Matthew 6:25-34 [Full Chapter]
[ Do Not Worry ] “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? ...

We are being bombarded with the worry's of the world more than ever. I have to remind my self of Matt 6.

Have faith that Jesus is with you and loves you.
I have to remind my self that its not of God to have fear and continually harbour thoughts of fear.
Be Joyful no matter what we are going through is mentioned many times in the bible. THis is very important for a christian to realise.
Look up bible passages about fear and anxiety worry and joy in a concordance.And see what God says about it. Doing this has helped me alot

thank you I am doing my best to not worry now, reading some book that's helping me with that. wish I would've stopped myself from worrying that day but can't change the past.