Hi! I just recently turned 16 years old, so naturally, hormones are a flowin'. And I want to be the best Christian I possibly can, but I'm having trouble overcoming overwhelming feelings of lust. It's an issue that lots of my friends are also dealing with. I understand that masturbation is a sin, but in my state, it is often times an undeniable urge. I pray to God for forgiveness, and for strength, but the urge just never goes away. Anyway, I'm sure a good portion of you have dealt with something similar, and I'd like to know what you did to remain pure. What does one do, in order to abstain from masturbation? At the moment, it looks like an impossible task.
Dear fellow classical music fan (I assume),
Firstly, there is no consensus about understanding actual masturbation as sin:
Some Christians, especially in European traditions including myself, have been
educated that the Biblical passages discussing masturbation have a metaphorical or historical rather than literal meaning.
The specific passage some people use to label masturbation as sin talks about a man, Onan, whose brother passed away and whose widow needs to be "taken care of" - in ancient Judaic tradition, it was common for a brother-in-law to reproduce with a widow. Onan, however, doesn't inseminate her for various reasons (pride?) and instead "spilled his sperm on the ground".
Genesis 38 NIV 1984
Some people interpret that as "masturbation is sin" in any occasion and circumstance.
According to my religious education, that has very little to do with masturbation itself, but rather, it is a metaphor of someone "refusing to do God's will".
Some think it is specifically associated with "non-procreational" or "interrupted" sex. Wikipedia gives a very brief overview of different interpretations:
Onan - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
It may be a metaphor for "getting wasted" in general, wasting resources, money, time on useless things (booze, drugs, lust etc.).
Now, this is
what we learned in class as
Roman Catholics. I know that
other denominations have extremely different views about masturbation (and I think most people on this forum are of other denominations).
Secondly, having discussed the above, I must say the following about my personal experience:
I have "onanated" a lot as a teenager and shared the common belief that it was natural and even necessary. However, even as a teenager I noticed that if, for random reasons, I forgot to do it for a couple of days, or if I did it
without lust (e.g. it happened by itself, without me doing anything or thinking about sexy women), I had a strong feeling of power growing in me.
Thinking back, I think that feeling could have been part of how it feels to be "pure" and "holy" and "in communication with God".
Another thing I noticed is that whenever I had a serious crush on a girl, the urge completely vanished. Like, I completely felt no need.
Today, I am 10 years older than you and I have had several "spiritual transformations". One of them was knowing love, or rather the woman I love.
And ever since my feelings for her developed (ca 4 years ago), I rarely feel the urge - unless I am in extreme cases of stress, anxiety and paranoia.
My conclusion from this is that while I share the idea that masturbation itself is
not sin, I keep experiencing and seeing in others that NOT masturbating is associated with a greater sense of spiritual purity, clarity of mind and nurturing love - and I mean love for a woman.
Putting 2 and 2 together, one can find sense in it.
I think the actual bad guy is lust, promiscuous desire.
If you touch thinking of your neighbors wife, or someone whom you don't love but only desire sexually -- that is sin.
I hope my text gave you a wider insight about the topic.