Dear McW,
You ask great questions. I know my answer will fall far short of what you ask, but here is a start.
When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?
She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more. (John 8:10,11)
Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the LORD (Lev. 19:18)
But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you
(Matt 5:14)
Seeing ye have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit unto unfeigned love of the brethren, see that ye love one another with a pure heart fervently. (1 Peter 1:22)
Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous: Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing. (1 Peter 3: 8,9)
Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone. Yea, a man may say, Thou hast faith, and I have works: shew me thy faith without thy works, and I will shew thee my faith by my works. (James 2:17, 18)
The Scriptures say a whole lot more about how we should love one another and act toward one another. It also tells us to love those who are opposed to us. I know that I fall far short of the mark, but in my walk with Christ the goal does not change and we are called daily to be Christ like in all that we do, say and think.
We are to love our neighbour, our enemies and most especially our bothers and sisters in Christ. Good, solid theology is important, but it is as or more important that we live the Live that Christ calls us unto.
Coram Deo,
Kenith