One Tip

[Elizabeth Gray]

It seems like there are many here at CF who are first-time parents like me, and I would LOVE to hear one tip from each of you who are experienced parents on how to raise children in a Godly manor, raise them up healthy, happy, and to love the Lord.

Even if you're a new parent, you can give a tip as well. I know that we're still learning, but we know a few things about parenting, too.

So let's have it...what's your best parenting tip?!

 

[scaddigs]

Honesty. It takes only one time of lying to your child to cause him/her to never be sure to trust an answer you give.

That is what my grown children have said they most appreciated when growing up; knowing that what I said was the TRUTH. Whether good or bad, they knew I'd be honest with them & they found/find a comfort & security in that.
God bless,
Lynn

 

[lucypevensie]

Read the book Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp.

 

[EJO]

One tip....that is hard.

"Never let them see you sweat."

PRAY PRAY PRAY

 

[kimber1]

Get them and keep them in church. I ahve an 11 yr old and a 3 yr old adn although my oldest sometimes fights me about goign to church, he goes anyway adn 9 times out of 10 will tell me on the wya home he's glad that he went in teh first place!!

 

[Christmasguy]

The first thing that came to my mind, was be consistant, in everthing.

No is No and Yes is Yes. No doesn't mean Maybe nor does yes mean maybe.

 

[Elizabeth Gray]

One tip....that is hard.

Well, giving more than one is ok!!

Great responses so far guys! I'd have to agree with "Be consistent" the most..that's what we are working on and one thing I've always been determined to do.

 

[ukok]

never, ever, go to sleep on an argument with your children.

 

[Reformationist]

Well, giving more than one is ok!!

Great responses so far guys! I'd have to agree with "Be consistent" the most..that's what we are working on and one thing I've always been determined to do.

Absolutely. Be consistant. However, be consistantly biblical in training them up. It's possible, and detrimental, to be consistantly wrong in your technique. Remember, just because your children have opinions doesn't mean their opinions carry the same weight as your authority.

Here's my tip:

For every one time you have to discipline them, show them that you love them, either by hugging them or spending time with them, ten times. Obviously you don't do these back to back or you could confuse the child.

I don't know if you disagree with spanking or not but if you don't here's a very sound biblical method that will translate into alot of godly things that they should be doing later in life.

When my children break the rules I have them apologize to whoever was affected by their disobedience and make them be specific about what it is they are apologizing for. Kids often just want to say, "I'm sorry." Then, prior to the discipline, I tell them I love them and that I hope they can obey next time. Then, I follow through. I also try to pray with them after and teach them that they should ask God to forgive them for disobeying mommy and daddy.

I also try to make the punishment relate to the offence, if possible. For instance, my daughter would regularly "forget" to put her dirty clothes in the hamper. So, I spanked her (this is to deal with the rebellion), and then I punished her. Her punishment was that she had to put everyone else's dirty clothes in the hamper for a week.

This has helped them learn responsibility for their actions and understand that when they do break the rules there will be a consequence. And, they learn that no matter what they do I will never stop loving them and forgiving them for their mistakes.

In addition to this, if I make a mistake and it affects my family, I make sure I, too, apologize to them. This is a shining moment in a child's life. "Daddy is apologizing to me? You mean daddy makes mistakes too? Well, I forgive you daddy." IOW, set the example.

God bless

 

[Fritzpw]

Be consistent.

Children tend to be gamblers... if there's a 10 percent chance they'll get away with something they'll take the gamble.

Be consistent.

 

[JohnR7]

It seems like there are many here at CF who are first-time parents like me, and I would LOVE to hear one tip from each of you who are experienced parents on how to raise children in a Godly manor, raise them up healthy, happy, and to love the Lord.

One thing I did was to sign up for the teacher training classes at my church for the sunday school teachers. I don't plan to be a sunday school teacher, but it helped me a lot to learn how to teach the Bible, and Bible truths to my son.

Of course some churchs do not take a interest in their sunday school program and it's more of a baby sitting service than anything else. But there are lots of churchs out there with a lot of different programs for the kids. Esp. this time of year with all the different VBS programs. My son loves to go to the different programs. In fact he is at a VBS program right now at a church near to our house.

 

[Durango]

This evening there was quite a ruckus in the Durango household . . .

We have 3 boys around the house so having a ruckus going on is pretty
commonplace. . . .

Anyway, it seems the 2 youngest ones were fighting and yelling at one
another
so my oldest son decided to go and try to calm the matter down. . . .

Well before long, he was right in the mix yelling at his brothers.

So, I went upstairs to see what all the commotion was about.

And as I walked into the room I heard Bubba, my oldest son yell at Little Durango "why do you always treat your little brother that way?"

To which he answered, "take a look at yourself, look at how you treat me."

Well, I jumped in broke up the argument and explained to them how none of them should be speaking to each other in such a manner.

I also took the oldest one on the side and explained to him that regardless of whether he realized it or not the younger ones look up to him and model themselves after him. Therefore he needs to set a good example for them.

After everything was said and done I went downstairs, poured myself a cup of coffee, and thought about what had just transpired. . . .

That one line "take a look at yourself, look at how you treat me." It kept going through my mind.

And I thought about how maybe we all should take
a good look at ourselves and how we treat others.

Perhaps we should take a good look at ourselves, and stop pointing fingers at everyone else all the time. . . .

Then maybe, just maybe we will begin to see what Our Lord meant when he spoke of the "Golden Rule".

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

After all we claim to be Christians, shouldn't we be showing the world we are Christians through our actions as well as our words?

Just a thought over coffee.

Durango

 

[49erfan]

Take your children to church!

Make going to church as a family a normal and regular occurance. Hillary Clinton said that "it takes a village" to raise a child. She was right and that village should be your church.

 

[jayswife29]

Don't let other family members(especially non-christians) tell you how to raise your children, if it goes against your better judgement. Been there done that, my mother in-law thinks she knows it all, I guess thats why none of her kids talk to her!!

 

[Trisa]

I would say be slow to anger. Also read the book
To Train Up A Child by Michael and Debi Pearl.
They also have a free newsletter at NoGreaterJoy.org.

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

Momma don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys.

evidently this is so important that they wrote a song about it...

 

[Risen Tree]

I'm not a parent, but from what I have observed while watching people's behaviors (a personal pasttime), I must advocate:

Swift and temporal punishment. When the child breaks a rule, he or she must immediately receive the appropriate punishment. Warnings are dumb and ineffective. After the punishment is administered, the child should be released with no further due.

 

[Trisa]

Yes I agree that you should NOT keep giving
your children warnings. They should do what you tell them to do
when you tell them to do it. None of this if I have to tell
you one more time Im going to spank you. Who is the boss?
Things like that lead to you as a parent losing your temper
because you kept giving warnings until you finally snap.
I see it all the time. being a parent is a hard job and we must pray daily
for God to help us and guide us Everyone has days when they think I
can't do this anymore, don't feel guilty just pray for God to help you deal with
it the right way.

 

[water_ripple]

Momma don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys.

evidently this is so important that they wrote a song about it...

It's true! It's true! My hubby's a cowboy!

 

[water_ripple]

I do not know if this one has been suggested yet so if it's a repeat my apologies....

Discipline with love.