OCD about what others think.....

[aflower4God]

I have had OCD most of my life (according to mother) and I have been on meds for several years now that has helped me with most of my OCD issues, but there is one area that I am struggling with OCD.
That is when someone hurts my feelings I repeat this over and over again with my best friend and I agonize it and stew about it for litterally HOURS, asking what did I do wrong aka blaming myself for it ALLLLLLLLLL the time, it gets so bad that sometimes I have to sleep to "recharge" my mind to stop thinking about it.
Has anyone suffered this or is suffering through this part of OCD? PLEASE give me your advice as to what helped you get through it.
Thank you.

 

[seajoy]

Hi....and yes, I used to do this very same thing. Have you tried ERP therapy on these obsessions? I still have to watch out for this one if I'm depressed at all. But what works is to just say to yourself "big deal" and let the wave of anxiety pass. Keep doing this each time you get the thought that you did something wrong in a friendship. If you do a lot of "sorrys" to friends, allow yourself only one sorry from here on in.

 

[frank1234]

Knowing 3 things might help:
1-We are commanded by The Lord to forgive others when they hurt us(we can do this in prayer and keep doing it until our feelings catch up),
2-The only person we are going to hurt by rehersing the negative emotions is ourselves,
3-we should know that non of us is perfect, and that God can forgive us when we do wrong and that we can ask for forgiveness and receive the pardon and can move forward with life and learn from our mistakes for next time around; so pondering too much about our imperfections is being harsh on ourselves. God knows we are not perfect and all He wants from us to learn from our mistakes and move on. He is forgiving and merciful and graceful towards us and we should be the same with ourselves. God bless you.

 

[aflower4God]

Thank you both my dear sweet loving brother, God bless you and LOTS OF LOVE to you ((((((((((((BIG HUGS)))))))))))))

 

[shelovesChrist]

hey aflower4God, Frank is right . the hardest thing for me to do is feels like is forgiving myself . and the false guilt and accusations can have you in a critical state of self evaluation which is hard . but we just have to ask the Lord to help us move on, something big to us is so small to Him, and He is able in ALL . the Holy Spirit does convict us but we have to be careful we don't let OCD trap us into false guilt . Jesus said His sheep hear His voice, the more we know Him, the more we know what's not Him. praying for you .

 

[OCDS]

Hey aflower4God ,

I was brutalized growing up and harassed severely by my friends growing up. My temperament is very delicate and I am very sensitive in nature. So when I used to get verbal jabs, it hurt, but most of the time, it was just something inconsiderate, rude, or hurtful someone would say to me. And it always made me think "How much longer Lord? Why me? Its so painful...ect" I used to lose comfort over it for a day or 2 before I get better. Mostly because like you, my compulsions are mental. I would always think "what happened that this person should say that" or "what did I do to deserve that?" It would basically shoot down my day.

I remember two thing that helped me get through it--

1) Remembering that if they knew how much of an effect it had on me, they would not have said it. At the end of the day the things people say that hurt us, are nothing but ignorance.
2) Exposure therapy. This was a new one for me: Instead of trying to find out WHY they said it, or commiserate with my friend over it or try to understand what would provoke them, I would expose myself and say "who cares, I know it is OCD driving me to get these answers and to get these feelings in order, and I know it won't matter within 24-48 hours. Hope this helps. God be with you! I know how cruel and hurtful people can be!