Not thinking its 'okay'

[Silver-winged Flyer]

Hi

I used to self-harm a few years ago but stopped when I scared myself by hurting myself badly. I started again last year sometime and I don't do it regularly but I see it as a 'normal' way of dealing with my emotions.
I know other people would find it shocking so how do I change my thinking so that I recognize it as a bad coping mechanism?

I'm housesitting this weekend and the last time I housesat for this couple, I self-harmed. I'm going through a bad low now and even though I promised the guy that I wouldn't self-harm at their house again, I realised that I may break my promise because I'm not doing well and being on my own for the weekend, there'd be nobody to catch me, I still live with my parents. I've asked him to hide what I used to cut myself with so I don't have access to anything I can use this weekend.

 

[Criada]

I know how hard it is to do this... because at the end of the day, it *is* a coping mechanism, and as such, it's better than not coping!
My therapist has compared it to smoking... you know it is bad for you, but the immediate positive effect overcomes that knowledge. So for you, it is a good thing.
The only way to change that, I think, is not to try to stop, but instead to focus on developing other mechanisms which work, and help you through the difficult emotions. You can't put down a coping strategy, however bad, and leave yourself without one.
I don't know what else might work for you... I find writing (usually very bad poetry) can help 'get the emotions out'... some people find physical exercise helps... you need to explore what works for you. Once you have other things in place, the need to cut won't be so desperate.

I haven't really managed this very well myself yet, but I'm getting there, and you will as well