Not sure how to cope

[vita_fragilis]

My friend, Kelly, has died. She hung herself.
Why didn't she tell me?
Why didn't she let me help?
What was the final straw?
I'll never know the answers to these questions.

Tomorrow is the 9th anniversary of another friend's suicide. She took an overdose aged just 16.

Am I such a bad friend? I couldn't save them.

I know God is here for me. At least, I know it in my head. My heart is screaming. The eternal question - why did He let it happen?

I'm not sure what to do next. I guess I'm in shock. I wish I wasn't alone here. I live alone. At times like this, I need a friend. But I'm scared. I don't want to burden anyone in case it's the final straw for them too. I can't be responsible for any more such senseless death. I guess people will say it's not my fault. I'm not sure of anything any more though.

 

[NoelAsa]

Welcome to Christian Forums. I am sorry that you have not had a response until now. Not to many people come to the grief section of CF.

Any death is terrible, but suicide is worse. The waste of someones life at their own hands is always shocking. It is a terrible tragedy. I don't have any experience with suicide, but there is a website for the family and friends of those who have committed suicide. Survivors of Suicide - Suicide Survivors - Survivors of Suicide Support Groups

I have never used it, but it looks like something that might be helpful for you.

Praying that you and all of those involved will draw strength and comfort from our Lord and Savior!

 

[mandelduke]

My best friend killed himself in 1989. My youngest daughter died on Aug 10th 2009, four days before her 19th birthday. Coping with death is very hard, God will comfort you if you let him. I am so sorry for your loss!

 

[BlueStarSkyMonkey]

hey hun, i'm late replying to this but it is in NO WAY your fault. Please don't blame yourself ok? I just lost my Grandma a few days ago and it is awful, truly awful.
i am here if you need to talk, just PM me <3

 

[WarmTribute]

I just wanted to let you know that the death of your friends were NOT YOUR FAULT! And you should not question how good of a friend you are.

I'm really sorry to hear how much you have to handle in such a young age, but stay strong. You are making the right moves by posting to this group and not bottling it in.

Warmest regards,
Fleming
Warm Tribute Online Memorials
WarmTribute.com

 

[devastated]

Hi, I just came across your post. I know that this is a really late reply and you may not read it. But I'm really sorry about the loss of your friends. I understand a little about what you're going through. I had a friend commit suicide when I was in high school and I remember walking around wondering how everyone else can still function and carry on with life when something so terrible had happened.

Other people's actions are never your fault. It is always their choice. I hope that you have found someone to talk to to share your grief. I pray that you will find comfort with God.

 

[SplendidTree]

Praying, sister.