No one understands me

[ladylove86]

I go through a episode about every 2 to 3 months. After i snap and come back to myself, i get depressed and my brain feels so tired. And i have no one who understands me or my disorder. I know im a handful to my husband he doesn't give me any support and he is tired of it. It hurts because i feel alone by myself. This is not something that i can control and i don't think him or anyone else realizes it. I'm just tired and i feel like i need a break even from myself. i get suicidal because it hurts so bad. And im really tired i cant sleep at night i hate it and i hate me because i am so unnormal, i wish i had some one who really understood me and i don't. I just need someone who understands.

 

[BlueJay83]

my wife says exactly the same thing.. she feels nobody understands her or believes in her. I feel for you, it's tough.

I know i struggle with my wifes disorder. it's hard for everyone.

just know, you are loved, despite how you feel...

 

[ladylove86]

I feel for me too. He shouldn't be married to me if its a problem. I didnt choose this. He should look for someone NORMAL.

 

[BlueJay83]

........thats also exactly what my wife says...

infact, i'm wearing her wedding ring right now because she took them off.

I love my lady, i married her because i love her.
we didn't know this was going to happen... but it did.

we made a vow before God and man "for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health" I'm sure your husband feels the same.. he loves the lady he married.. and he's willing to fight through the tough stuff to see her inbetween episodes.

don't hurt him by rejecting him. it does hurt.. believe me.

Just remember, when we are raised from the dead at the end of the agw, we are given perfect bodies.
You can be together and be perfectly healthy for eternity.

sounds pretty good to me.

 

[ladylove86]

He knew this before he got married, He knew something was wrong with me. He refuses to let me get on medication. I'm just as tired as he his. But if he cant deal with it then he just leave it. I'm not rejecting him he is rejecting me. he hasent talked to me since last night. i didn't choose to be this way and if he really loved me then he wouldn't act they way he does toward me when i have a episode. He should show me love and support. And allow me to go get help.

 

[klatyla]

Cry to God, Call to God, he understands fully what you are going through, he created you therefore he knows exactly how you operate.

Every moment of your day he is with you, to guide and lead you, to give you peace that surpasses all understanding and love and support abundantly.

Looking for help, GOD IS YOUR HELP! Walk with him, then you will know the power of God.

 

[ladylove86]

thanks im just in so much pain i rather be alone. i have been abandoned and rejected my entire life. im tired of being thrown away by people. it just hurts. Im patiently waiting to see who is gonna throw me away next. thats sad.

 

[visionary]

Give God your hurt, our pain, and your feelings of aloneness, He is the only one who can truly heal the heart, the mind, and the emotions...

Quit handing a problem to your mate that he is unequiped to deal with.. that is not fair to him or you.. it would like asking him to do heart surgery.. or brain surgery.. he is just not trained or able to do this... but you can ask him to hold you, murmur sweat nothings in your ear... and offer you a cup of tea..

Let's not destroy a relationship .. that when you are feeling better.. it is good.

 

[klatyla]

I will never leave you or forsake you!!! Gods word to you !!!!!

you are never alone he is there with you whether you like it or not, why? because you are precious to him and you have something within you that is precious to all of us, you have a testimony that will bring life to people who are or will go through the same you are going through. It is not the comfort of man that we cry for but the comfort of a Father that loves us for who we are and knows our every need.

As he is there with you, reach out and take his hand, he loves and cares for you and he will take your broken heart and give you his....

 

[jsrdrnr]

I am sorry for what you are going through. Since he will not let you get help, I can only tell you to go to the One that can be your all. God knows what you are going though and what you are feeling. Go to him and he will lift you up. He can make you whole again and he can help you.

 

[mum24]

I'm sorry hon but if he is stopping you from getting help that is abuse. Get help anyway. You deserve to get help for your mental condition. Yes, also turn to God and all of that but please.... Get help for yourself. Your mate is probably scared of the cure more than the disease but once he sees the results will turn around. And if not that is his choice. But it is your right to get help. Even of you are a Christian. Even if you are in submission to your husband , you can still get help. Please do this.
Hugs

 

[SinkingShip]

I'm going to "join the chorus" and recommend that you go out and get help regardless of what your husband says or thinks. I have to deal with a parent who thinks this is all "in my head" and that I don't need medication and I should just stop taking them. The reality is, this is my life, its my mind, and its ultimately me who has to deal with the mood swings and thre crippling depression and then put up with her wonding why I'm depressed.

If you feel that you need help, and that seeing a doctor and getting some medication would help, then do so regardless of what anyone else says or thinks. This is YOUR life. and you're the one being hurt the most by this disease. I waited until after a suicide attempt before I sought out help and all I could think afterwards was how much easier my life would have been if I had sought out help earlier. Ultimately, we are each responsible for our own wellbeing - as the saying goes, "God helps those who help themselves". I've found that to be true so often in my life, its amazing.