No debates

[startingxthexjourney]

I tried to post earlier....but it never went through. So i'll reword and post again.
I struggle with SSA and am looking for some support and encouragement. i am working through it with a counselor, but need peers and other support too.
I do not want a debate regarding this, so please don't argue about whether being gay is a sin or whatnot.
Thank you
me

 

[davedjy]

Do you want to get rid of the attraction or do you want encouragement to live with the attraction and be Christian while doing that?

 

[startingxthexjourney]

Get rid of the attraction, for sure.
It goes against my beliefs on Christianity.

 

[Myriah]

Get rid of the attraction, for sure.
It goes against my beliefs on Christianity.

How long have you had this attraction?

And, do you have any attraction towards men?

 

[startingxthexjourney]

about 3.5 years.
and i definitely have an attraction to guys.
it's about 1/2 and 1/2, and usually leans more towards men. i would rather be involved with a guy than a girl anyday....
*shrug* its just hard to sort out

 

[PinkTulip]

Pray about it. Read the Bible.

 

[Myriah]

about 3.5 years.
and i definitely have an attraction to guys.
it's about 1/2 and 1/2, and usually leans more towards men. i would rather be involved with a guy than a girl anyday....
*shrug* its just hard to sort out

I'm heterosexual, so I like men a lot too, and my husband is the greatest, so I have to log off and make him dinner soon.

I have never struggled with SSA, though I have a relative who is "married" with children now. She never was attracted to guys while we were growing up into puberty, that's why I asked.

So, if you are attracted to guys, then I'd think you should keep your focus on that and Jesus. That's the best advice I have becuz I've never struggled with being attracted to my own sex, other than for friendship.

I don't have any answers for you. All I could really offer you is prayer, if you'd like that.

And I'm sure you will find some friends here, too.

 

[Jessica Lauren]

I've been there, and got through it. Well, I didn't go to any counselors or anything... but yeah. I'm praying for you.

 

[startingxthexjourney]

Thanks. How did you do it, if you don't mind me asking? because i don't know what to do....

 

[danstar]

if u ever want someone to spill your guts to about this im here, send me a pm if u like

 

[startingxthexjourney]

thanks so much! that means a lot....

 

[Mr.Cheese]

.

 

[startingxthexjourney]

thanks for that. struggling with this gets impossible though. that combined with other stuff i'm dealing with. gah, i hate it!
~me

 

[danstar]

talk to me on msn u have my address now im sure i can help

 

[BigToe]

I think for a lot of people who feel they struggle with this but don't want to, it might not be what your first conclusion is. It is possible to confuse other emotions and feelings for people as being a sexual attraction when it isn't. Finding people of the same sex attractive does not mean you are sexually attracted. Likewise, feelings of love for someone of the same sex does not have to mean you are romantically interested.

Relationships with other people can form on many different planes. Some are physical, some emotional, but there are also spiritual, intellectual and so forth types of bonds. Any one or combination does not necessarily mean anything about your sexuality. If you find you have various relationships of various types all it means is you are open to love and relationships (not romantic/sexual in this instance).

So is that what has you worried about same sex attraction? Or is it something else that has you concerned about it?

 

[startingxthexjourney]

i think what worries me is that i am physically, emotionally, and relationally attracted to the same sex. i don't want to be by any means, but am.

 

[BigToe]

Would you act on it? Because if not, it could very well be something else that is confusing the emotions too.

 

[startingxthexjourney]

i have acted on it, many times. -shrug- it stinks.

 

[startingxthexjourney]

**bump**

 

[GirlofGod33]

I think for a lot of people who feel they struggle with this but don't want to, it might not be what your first conclusion is. It is possible to confuse other emotions and feelings for people as being a sexual attraction when it isn't. Finding people of the same sex attractive does not mean you are sexually attracted. Likewise, feelings of love for someone of the same sex does not have to mean you are romantically interested.

Relationships with other people can form on many different planes. Some are physical, some emotional, but there are also spiritual, intellectual and so forth types of bonds. Any one or combination does not necessarily mean anything about your sexuality. If you find you have various relationships of various types all it means is you are open to love and relationships (not romantic/sexual in this instance).

So is that what has you worried about same sex attraction? Or is it something else that has you concerned about it?

That's very true, too. Part of the problem is that this world throws very confusing messages about love and sexuality at people.
Finding someone of the same sex attractive does not mean that you are actually physically/sexually/romantically attracted to that person. People tend to confuse this very frequently. You can think someone is the most gorgeous person on the planet, but that doesn't mean you are actually attracted to them. Girls, in particular, seem to notice how other girls look and tend to measure each other's looks. As girls, I think we're very aware of how we all look and compare to others.
There have been female celebrities--actresses, singers, whatever-- who I think are stunning. I wish I looked like them...call it being starstruck, perhaps. They just seem larger than life and so cool. But it's more of a "Gosh, I wish I could be like that," more than anything else.