Needing prayer

[jfgm]

I have been looking for a Christian site that would have people who I could ask for prayer. I found this site last night, but it looks like there's not much action. I must post anyway, as I am so needing Christians to lift me up in prayer. I lost my husband of 48 years just over 4 weeks ago. My life is just one big empty hole. I know God is there, but my faith is so weak and my heart is so broken I can hardly function. I can't eat and I know my body is suffering. I've lost 25 pounds in the last 6-7 weeks. I am so ashamed that I haven't been able to give this to God. I gave my life to the Lord many years ago, as did my husband, and it is so hard to feel like He isn't near me right now when I need Him the most. I don't know what to do with myself, every day seems never-ending. I have no motivation to do anything. I am tired all the time. I feel like I am wallowing in my grief. I'm afraid I'm going to get stuck here. It feels like I must be getting mentally unstable and it scares me. Please God, let a strong Christian get this message so they will pray for me.
Jane

 

[nanajojothatsme]

hello jfgm, I am so sorry for your loss , I lost my husband in January, and I do know some of the things you are going through.
I go to a grief-loss group that meets 2 times a month ,there I can see there are others going through exactly what I am going through . I have learned alot by going there, if you have one near, you really need to check it out hospice usually have groups. this one I go to is by hospice.
I lost weight at first . but now all I want to do is eat
if you want to pm me I would love to help you if I can . as for the mentally unstable thing. yes it is normal especially for widows. no idea how old you are but I work still so that is what has helped me tremendously. it definately takes a large part of my day and when I am working I am not thinking .
God bless you , Jo

 

[FallingWaters]

I have been looking for a Christian site that would have people who I could ask for prayer. I found this site last night, but it looks like there's not much action. I must post anyway, as I am so needing Christians to lift me up in prayer. I lost my husband of 48 years just over 4 weeks ago. My life is just one big empty hole. I know God is there, but my faith is so weak and my heart is so broken I can hardly function. I can't eat and I know my body is suffering. I've lost 25 pounds in the last 6-7 weeks. I am so ashamed that I haven't been able to give this to God. I gave my life to the Lord many years ago, as did my husband, and it is so hard to feel like He isn't near me right now when I need Him the most. I don't know what to do with myself, every day seems never-ending. I have no motivation to do anything. I am tired all the time. I feel like I am wallowing in my grief. I'm afraid I'm going to get stuck here. It feels like I must be getting mentally unstable and it scares me. Please God, let a strong Christian get this message so they will pray for me.
Jane

Dear Jane,

I am so very sorry about your loss. *hugs*

I just lost my husband 12 weeks ago. My husband was only 50. He died suddenly and unexpectedly. He was the breadwinner. I am 50 also. I have never supported myself, and I have never had a full-time job.

I get scared every day. I am only able to take one day at a time. If I start thinking about the future, I get overwhelmed and panic. I have to start every morning with Bible reading and prayer. I read in a Devotional, and I put my armor on. Every night before I go to bed I read in my Bible and pray again... oh and I write in a journal, too, morning and evening... when I have something to say. I make sure I write down all the encouraging words I receive, all the things I think God is telling me, all the ways I see God's hand at work in my life, etc. so I can go back and remind myself and encourage myself.

I have noticed that when I get tired, that's when I get discouraged more easily, so I've been trying to make sure I go to bed early enough. Also, my body isn't reacting well to the junk food I used to eat, so I am eating healthy and drink plenty of water. I have children at home still (19 & 15), so I'm sure my responsibility to them is forcing me to keep on going even though I don't feel like it.

I have been letting the people at my church know of my prayer requests or other needs. They have been helping me. I have some friends on facebook who will pray for me, so I broadcast my prayer needs that way, too.

I also belong to a 12-step group for Christians called Celebrate Recovery. If you Google the name, you can find one in your area. The 4 women who came to my house and helped me the week my husband died were all women who I know from there. The friendships we have built there are much more intimate than what you can get on Sunday morning.

I went to a bereavement group a couple of times but it was in the first few weeks of my husband's death, and it was too soon.

Father, I pray for Jane, that You would make yourself real to her, that You would carry her through this time, that You would speak to her spirit through Your word, that You would bless her with friends who will pray for her, that You would wash away her shame, that You would pour Your love into her heart.



Jane~
You haven't told us much about yourself. How old are you? Do you have a job? What state do you live in? Do you have children near you? I have read some of your prayers on the forum. You seem to be a woman of the word and of faith... are you a member of a church?

 

[jfgm]

Hi FallingWaters,
Thank you so much for posting. You are going through your own issues, and that you took time to pray for me is so appreciated. You sound like you are really getting to a point where you know what to do when you start having a "moment". At 12 weeks, you are 7 weeks ahead of me. It gives me hope to see that you are leaning how to deal with all that you are dealing with. I cannot imagine how difficult it must be to have the added fears about not having worked before, having kids at home who are going through their own feelings of loss, losing your young husband so suddenly. Your time with God and His word and your devotionals are surely the sustaining factors. I need to learn from your good example!

I am a retired RN and Nursing Home Administrator. I worked for about 30+ years. I retired about 1 1/2 years ago so my husband and I could do more things together. We didn't get a lot of time to do things, but I'm thankful for what we did do over the years. He was the one person in this world that I shared all my memories, thoughts, feelings, weaknesses, strengths, etc. with. I have a giant missing piece in my life. It's like half of me (or more) is gone. We were married over 48 years.

We live in a small town, but I will check to see if there is a Celebrate Recovery group here. I have found one bereavment group that meets twice a month and there's supposed to be a 6 or 8 week course starting this fall. I have started attending some ladies Bible study groups and they have been a wonderful help to me.

Again, thank you so much for your thoughtfulness and your prayers. I know that God is my hope. About the first thing that came to my mind this morning when I got up was, "His mercies are new every morning". I cling to that for my very life.

Dear Heavenly Father, I ask you to visit FallingWaters with your peace and assurance that all will be well for her and her children. Give her confidence about her security, her well being, and her future. Thank you Lord, that you have given her wisdom about how to take care of her health, and how to turn to you for strength, and where to look for friends and support. I ask you too, to comfort her children who are surely feeling lost without their dad. Help them to look to you for healthy ways to deal with their grief as the deal with this huge loss in their young lives.

Thank you Lord, for leading FallingWaters to share her story and some of her coping mechanisms with me. I am so thankful that you can lead your children where you want them to go, sending the message that another of your children needs. Please bless FallingWaters abundantly. Help her to feel your sweet, healing spirit every day. We ask these things in the name of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

Sounds like everything you are going thru is normal. And because you say you are concerned about getting stuck in a rut, you won't. In times like these, we need to go thru the steps, even if they don't make sense in how we feel. It is truly devistating to lose your spouse as all or most of us here know. But remember, God knows what we are going thru and He will see you thru it. God gave up his Son Jesus on the cross for us, so he does know about loss. Of course he is God and knows the beginning from the end, and we don't have that luxury. But...because you are a Christian, you can have hope that you will see your spouse again in a WAY better body and world! That was the hope I hung onto in my first dealings with the loss of my husband. And it won't be that long either. It probably won't be as long as you were married even. We don't understand all the things that happen in this life, but we know that God is still in control and because of that, we WILL make it thru..with His mercy and His grace and His comfort. I know my husband is better off than me, he has completed his journey on this earth and only now has to wait until Jesus comes back for the rest of us. I am still here struggling, raising kids, and trying to manage my finances. But I have a great hope in seeing my family members that passed on the other side and in the meantime I look to God to get me thru. God Bless you sister!

 

[FallingWaters]

Sounds like everything you are going thru is normal. And because you say you are concerned about getting stuck in a rut, you won't. In times like these, we need to go thru the steps, even if they don't make sense in how we feel. It is truly devistating to lose your spouse as all or most of us here know. But remember, God knows what we are going thru and He will see you thru it. God gave up his Son Jesus on the cross for us, so he does know about loss. Of course he is God and knows the beginning from the end, and we don't have that luxury. But...because you are a Christian, you can have hope that you will see your spouse again in a WAY better body and world! That was the hope I hung onto in my first dealings with the loss of my husband. And it won't be that long either. It probably won't be as long as you were married even. We don't understand all the things that happen in this life, but we know that God is still in control and because of that, we WILL make it thru..with His mercy and His grace and His comfort. I know my husband is better off than me, he has completed his journey on this earth and only now has to wait until Jesus comes back for the rest of us. I am still here struggling, raising kids, and trying to manage my finances. But I have a great hope in seeing my family members that passed on the other side and in the meantime I look to God to get me thru. God Bless you sister!

Thanks for sharing, Michelle. *hugs*

 

[jfgm]

I am praising the Lord for bringing you sisters into my life. Your wisdom, trust in God, and willingness to share your experiences has lightened my heavy burden. I thank God for putting you in my path and for giving me the courage to share my burden which is so unlike who I usually am. I guess the Lord is working on me in ways I never would have expected.

Michelle, your comment that I will probably see Ken soon, "probably won't be as long as you were married even" was really a boost! I know how fast those 48 years went, and when you said that, it made me stop and think that it really could be very soon. I hadn't thought about it that way. It brought some longed-for joy and peace to my heart!! Wow! What a message from God.

My heart is full right now.

Thank you Lord, for sending these wonderful sisters my way. Thank you Lord, that your children know your voice and they do what you say. Help me Lord, to be as faithful and giving as these women. Bless their lives and the work they are doing for all of us here who need a spiritual sister in our lives. In Jesus' name. Amen

 

[FallingWaters]

Jane, I just wanted to say that I respect and honor you for the 48 years you were married. In this day and age, long marriages are not as common as they used to be. Congratulations.

I was married to my husband for almost 27 years. We stayed together through thick and thin. He was a faithful husband and devoted to serving our family.

I have an uncle who lost his wife 3 years ago after 62 years of marriage. He's having a hard time getting used to her not being there any more.

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

jfgm,

Thank you for your kind words. The words that I speak reflect how my feelings have played out in my own life, so they are sincere. And I would hope I am being guided by the Lord with anything I share. He is the one that deserves all the glory.
In life, we don't get to choose the hand that we are dealt, but we CAN choose to play that hand with God right by our side. Time does not heal anything, but what it DOES do, is, as time passes, so does some of the pain, and as we concentrate on fulfilling our purpose here on earth, and glorifying God in all we do, we can begin to trust in the hope that was given to us as we received our salvation. As we do that, we don't think as much about the pain we are in now, because our eyes are fixed on Jesus and OUR future hope. There is no getting around the fact that the pain is real, it really hurts, and there will be lots of other raw emotions that we don't even want to feel, but can't help it. BUT....our hope is not in the pain that we feel. Our hope is in Jesus Christ, in fact He is our ONLY hope! So, it's just something that we all have to go thru when we lose someone we love. Keep that in mind, and keep your mind focused on the Lord and He will bring you thru it, of that I am sure! God bless you and comfort you during this time.

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

Jane, I just wanted to say that I respect and honor you for the 48 years you were married. In this day and age, long marriages are not as common as they used to be. Congratulations.

I was married to my husband for almost 27 years. We stayed together through thick and thin. He was a faithful husband and devoted to serving our family.

I have an uncle who lost his wife 3 years ago after 62 years of marriage. He's having a hard time getting used to her not being there any more.

Falling Waters, so sorry for your loss as well. I was married for almost 25 years and my husband died a day after his 55th birthday (won't be hard to remember that anniversary). Anyway I just wanted you to know I was thinking about you too.

 

[FallingWaters]

Falling Waters, so sorry for your loss as well. I was married for almost 25 years and my husband died a day after his 55th birthday (won't be hard to remember that anniversary). Anyway I just wanted you to know I was thinking about you too.

Hi Michelle,

I'm so sorry for your loss, too.

*hugs*


ps: my husband died the day before my son's birthday. :-/

 

[singingwife]

Thanks for sharing, Jfgm. It has been almost a year for me, and we didn't have nearly as many years together. But I know how it is when you're just tired all the time, and wonder what to do next.
My prayers are with you. Please feel free to share more in how you have been, with every step. As well as read what's been posted here before.